


Gold and copper, silver and coal

by Follow (OceanFoam)



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Fantasy, M/M, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Build, junbin by the water again, this is a mess and i know
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-13
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-01-30 02:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 49,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21421003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OceanFoam/pseuds/Follow
Summary: It all starts with an odd string of deaths... Actually, it starts with a troubled fishing trip... No, it really starts with two brothers... Or would it be those two ill fated lovers?We could trace it back to months, years and centuries if we wanted to, but for now we'll keep it simple: It all starts with a storm...
Relationships: Goo Junhoe/Kim Hanbin | B.I
Comments: 7
Kudos: 16





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there. I don't know if I should be doing this. Maybe I should've kept this one as a wip until I had it done but I'm tired of having it locked up. It's getting way longer and more convoluted than expected and I'm afraid to let it grow stagnant (like many of my other wips did) if I don't post something asap. So yeah, this could backfire badly if I get stuck after posting (which has also happened before) but, well, risks were taken. 
> 
> I'm dropping the first part I have more or less polished for now, hopefully I won't have to modify anything as I go on with the whole story but don't discard that posibility, I'm a MESS when building plot. This moves kinda slowly, so I hope you can still enjoy this first part. Please do let me know if so? I'm kinda lost in it and very unsure so, yeah, it'd help a lot.
> 
> Lastly, there are other groups mixed in because I needed more characters and didn't want to go for OCs. But this is iKON centric. Wasn't sure to tag the other groups/idols because I'd make a mess of the tags and they're secondary characters at best, although some will have interference in the general story. So heads up, you'll just see them pop up here and there, surprise!
> 
> Alright, enough self-justifications and excuses. Last important reminders:
> 
> \- This is ongoing and far from done, please be patient  
\- English is not my first language  
\- Not beta'd (I'll start putting this one in the tags, it is NEVER beta'd)

087

Nope, not a specle of water yet. The air was so heavy with humidity though, it was bound to rain buckets any moment. 

“Is it raining yet?”

He looked back at his friend beside him, eyeing him sidewise while the young man slowly stirred his over the top caramel milkshake. 

“No, not yet” he said softly, watching as the huge tower of whipped cream slowly melted into the thick shake, wisps of caramel sauce dripping down. His teeth almost hurt at the simple sight “It’s gonna rain cats and dogs by the time it does”

“You tell me, the humidity is so fucking thick it’s disgusting” the other grumbled, stirring with a bit more force until a little of melted cream dripped over the side of the tall glass “My hair is a mess”

“Sure, blame the weather for that” the third of them chuckled softly.

The lighthearted bickering that was to follow inevitably worked as backdrop noise as Junhoe averted his eyes back outside. It was bound to rain soon, that was for sure. The sky was heavy with bulky clouds, the sun was hidden so high up the afternoon looked grim and dark. And still they were enjoying a respite in the cold, now sipping at ice teas and milkshakes when two days prior they had been huddling close to a radiator like mice to a corner. His own body thermostat was confused, sweating and shivering at the same time, making him go from jacket to short sleeves to blanket in the span of an hour.

A flash of light snapped his attention to the far side of their gloomy bay, over the low roofs of the houses all the way back to the climbing heights of the rocky walls at the south. It was bright and quick, and it left him with the slight foreboding expectation of the thunder running behind. 

“Oh, oh, you saw that?” Yunhyeong patted his shoulder softly “Did you see that-?”

The sharp slap of thunder cracked so loud in the sky Junhoe startled away from the window, watching in mundane surprise as the glass shook along the tremors of the air. Just seconds later, the crescendo of falling water accompanied the blurring sight of the street. It was finally starting to rain. 

“Ah, there we go” Chanwoo sounded almost relieved “Now it’s raining”

“It was time already” Yunhyeong grumbled, slurping noisily at his sweet drink.

\--

Good thing, the rain should be taking all the heavy moisture in the air soon enough. Bad thing, it was, indeed, raining bucketloads. Bad thing number two, the cafe closed early that day and they hadn’t seen the A4 paper notice stuck to the door when they entered.

“Ah crap”

“Didn’t you want the rain?”

“Well yeah, but it could have stopped already”

“What were you expecting? We had two days of faux summer, of course now we have a flood”

They had managed to hurry their way out of the cafe and under the nearest roof, which was a protruding balcony over a closed flower shop. 

“And can you believe it’s  _ still  _ warm? What the hell?”

“Give it time, it’ll go”

The inside of the store was cramped with big vases and crates filled with buckets, pots, bags, sacks and whole plants. The dim light of the day still crawled in, all the way back to the counter, where this little pile of books climbed up against the wall. The bits of floor that were not covered in things were splattered by the shadows of the rain sliding down the window, flickering along the stray lightnings litting up the sky outside. Junhoe laid back softly against the side of the door and shivered a little. It was an odd sight, cramped but vacant, dry but rained in shadows, dim but shined on. With the rumbling thunder and steady white noise of the rain, Junhoe felt it a bizarre way of cozy. But also a lonely type of sad. Like a giant aquarium.

“ _ June! _ ” Yunhyeong’s voice called a bit drowned in the heavy buzz of the rain, and Junhoe turned to find him and Chanwoo already sprinting across the street to the bus stop ahead. A quick look over the street made evident why; the bus was coming.

Junhoe jumped forward, splashing cold water over his ankles and breaking through the heavy curtain of rain. He followed the opaqued figures of his friends to the bus stop, braving the downpour and damp clothes in the reassurance that they were minutes away from home and a shower. He didn’t really mind, the storm would take away the abnormal warmth and maybe even help him sleep. 

Sputtering some water with a chuckle, he laughed and shivered when the bus splashed them up to their waists as it stopped on the flooded street.

* * *

097

**Yoyo**

Guys!! did you hear? 

**Chanumon**

What?

**Yoyo**

It happened again, another one washed up

**Chanumon**

…?

Oh you have to be kidding

**Yoyo**

Am not

Check the news

Well?

You see?

Chanu

So?

**Chanumon**

Yeah yeah wtf man, this is insane

**Yoyo**

Right?? and like after a storm again, what are the fucking odds??

**Chanumon**

idk man, this is freaky. what if its some kinda psycho on the loose?

**Yoyo**

Nah dont think so? i mean… i mean i hope not? 

these dudes were drunk off their asses, its not that weird that they end up down with the fishes if they try to go for a swim in the storm 

right?

**Chanumon**

wtf

what u talking abt? its been three dudes! three??

**Yoyo**

yeah but srlsy, three drunktards who said were going to the beach in the middle of a storm?? 

**Chanumon**

are u again on ur freaky mistiq theory??

**Yoyo**

Im just saying?? and i doubt thats the spelling

**Chanumon**

shut up

June! 

Wake up! Help me with this nutcase!

**Yoyo**

watch that mouth you little shit

but yeah, Juneeeeee

wake uuuup~

**Chanumon**

if you keep this up im gonna start suspecting its you drowning these guys

**Yoyo**

wtf Chanu!! how could you say that??

This was what he woke up to after feeling his pillow chime and hum for minutes on end. He peeled his face from the pillow, moved his feet around to get them tangled in the blankets. He stretched long and hard, feeling his back pull nicely and something in his arms pop weirdly, then slammed down on the mattress with a groan. He had slept so nicely, some solid eight hours of uninterrupted sleep, if his phone was on time. Bless that storm…

That brought him back to the subject in their groupchat though. They had found another one. Another man drowned by the shore, apparently drunk again? It was the third. The third one to wash up dead after a freak storm. He agreed with Chanwoo, it was weird as hell, and very worrying if they were to pin the reason of these deaths on some perturbed person roaming their town.

Feeling the pleasant fuzz of the good sleep slowly turn into unease in his stomach, he decided he should top the wonderful night with some actual breakfast before his appetite was ruined.

But he did open his chat just to drop a hi, knowing if he didn’t he would be getting a call soon enough.

\--

He was coiling a length of humid rope, feeling his fingers start to prickle slightly from the coarse fibers poking out. The bucket serving the times as a stool under his ass was rather small, the edges cutting into his butt and making him shift from time to time; the air was damp and mixed with sea water, humidity, gasoil and fish.

“You done there yet?” Chanyeol asked from down the pier, hoisting a sack over his shoulder as he walked up to Junhoe. Probably what was left of his cousin’s belongings in the ship, and by the pull on the fabric, probably weighting more than what the tall man made it look like “Come on, I’m starving! How long does it take you to roll a goddamned rope?”

“Almost done, it’s just coarse and my fingers are cold”

“Bullshit, gimme here” the other yanked the rope from Junhoe’s hurting hands in a firm tug, dropping the sack unceremoniously on the ground, and started rolling it on a loop over his hand and elbow. In seconds it was all neatly coiled “See?” he pushed the roll of rope back into Junhoe’s hands “There you little bitch. How do you sail with those doll hands?”

“Uh, I don’t?” he scoffed, admittedly offended “I’m fucking helping you here, you know? You’re welcome”

“Yeah, yeah, alright. Thank you, for whatever it is you did” Chanyeol shrugged, then picked up the sack and resumed his walk “Come on then, Junmyeon won’t wait for us”

Junhoe started after him, hooking the coil of rope and another similar up to his shoulder and carrying a bucket with rain boots in his other hand. 

“What’s his hurry anyway?” he asked “He bolted outta Sally before she even moored, since when does he ditch so quickly?”

“Beats me” his friend shrugged “He’s done so last time too. I think he’s getting skittish with the whole dead floating we’ve had recently”

“What does it have to do with anything? There’s no storm coming or anything”

Chanyeol eyed him weirdly, the way he did when he was, in his words,  _ trying to measure his current level of stupid _ . It goes unsaid that Junhoe did not appreciate the look very much. But before he could protest, Chanyeol was shedding light on his doubts.

“Nothing to do with storms, pal. You know ‘bout the bloke washed ashore the other day, yeah?” he waited for his nod, then continued “Well, you know how guys like them, Junmyeon and the sailors and fishermen are, yeah? They sometimes get a bit…” he waved a hand in circles, as if looking for the right expression “Uh… Superstitious? Weird? You know…” he shrugged “Anyway, this fellow, and the other two before him, were all in the same ship ´bout month ago? A bit more maybe. Thing is, they were like five in total or so, and when they returned from the trip they were… Well they were a bit high on the cabin loopiness, I dunno. They were saying some weird shit of a giant fish, or a shiny dolphin they had seen and tried to catch…” he trailed off, a weird grimace on his face. Junhoe said nothing while they walked away from the docks and to the parkings, waiting for him to resume the explanation, but Chanyeol seemed to have gotten unsure all of a sudden.

“Yeah… And?” he prompted, walking up to Chanyeol’s red truck and dropping the ropes and bucket in the back “They came talking drunk tales of glowing whales, what about it? It’s nothing really odd for this place honestly”

His friend dropped his sack (definitely heavier than it looked by the way the shit on the floor of the shell quacked) and hesitated for a moment before speaking “Nah, it’s just they were not really there, y’know? They really looked spooked and like… Out for this shiny thingy”

Then Junhoe understood “You were there!” Chanyeol shrugged at that, pursuing his lips a little and walking around the truck to the driver’s seat. Junhoe followed to the other side, waiting for the passenger’s door to unlock before jumping in “Right, you helped them unload, I remember you complaining about them being more annoying than usual, was that what you meant?”

“I guess, I dunno. But that’s not the thing. Or well, it kind of is?” ignition roared and he pulled the truck out of the parking, relaxing back into the seat as he drove into the town “Thing is, a week after that, freak humid storm comes crashing down, and the first bloke shows up floating near the long rocky chains down south” there was a pause, maybe Chanyeol was waiting for him to comment or something but Junhoe had nothing to offer just yet. The other just clicked his tongue and spoke, tone slightly exasperated “I mean, come on! They come talking about this weird thing, all of them, crazy talk but like so intense about it? Next week a weird ass storm hits and one of them suddenly drowns? Week after that another one, again drowned around the same place? And now  _ again _ ?” he looks at Junhoe, eyes round and questioning for a second before looking back to the road “Huh? I’m not into the superstitious shit, but man, you gotta admit there’s something odd as fuck there”

Junhoe admitted it looked a bit suspicious… Scratch that,  _ very _ suspicious. But he wasn’t about to pin it down to drunk talks of a glowing dolphin, what the heck? It did give him the chills though, when you put it all together like that. What was wrong with these guys? Maybe something did happen during their trip and now they were breaking down? Or what if they were killing each other? Trying to hide something? And anyway…

“What does it all have anything to do with Junmyeon bolting out of Sally?”

Chanyeol sighed loudly, as if he were to repeat something for the fourth time “The crew, those five dudes, three are dead, yeah? Well, one of the two still kicking was in the Sally with him in this trip. Guess he got itchy around the bloke”

“Oh...” he elongated the sound into a breathy chuckle, earning a mild chastiting glance from his friend “Alright, I get it now. I’m guessing he was too last time, if he also bolted?”

“Yeah, like half of them just want nothing to do with these guys, you know? They think they brought or took something they shouldn’t or whatever and now they’re being...” he visibly struggled to find a word “Uh, I dunno, what? Cursed? Hunted? Punished?” he sighed “These people”

“Huh” he nodded, but then immediately shook his head “That’s stupid. These guys could be into something serious, someone should try talking to them instead of avoiding them like the pest”

“And you think no one  _ has _ ?” Chanyeol’s voice grew loud and annoyed, and in response Junhoe shrinked a little bit into his seat. 

“Well, now I don’t” he mumbled, looking out of the window to the streets. They were almost at Junmyeon’s place.

There was a huff from his side, then a sharp but soft slap to his arm “Don’t sulk, you big baby. How is it that you run that big mouth so freely if you can’t take a little barking?”

“It’s not like I  _ try  _ to make people mad, you know?” and Chanyeol’s bark was not just any bark, for the record. You’d understand if you knew the dude in question. Junhoe was often told he himself looked big and intimidating, but he was a big softie. Chanyeol, on the other hand, was big but didn’t look intimidating… Until he got intense, then you reconsidered your life choices. But Junhoe just mumbled “And you’re loud”

The other scoffed softly “Rich coming from you” but then shook his head mildly and pulled his mouth a little bit to a side, almost a conceding smile “But yeah, I know,” he poked a single index finger against Junhoe’s temple, albeit softly “that brain-mouth filter needs time to recharge”

He swatted the hand away just in time for his friend to take the last turn into Junmyeon’s street “Alright, don’t go yapping about any of this to him now, got it?”

“Got it” he grumbled, snapping his seatbelt lose while Chanyeol parked “Not a word of glowing dolphins”

Chanyeol barked a single laugh as he pushed him out of his truck.

* * *

107

“Careful, it’s kinda hot” Yunhyeong said softly as he passed him the cup.

“How it’s supposed to be” he mumbled without bite, wrapping both his hands around the warm mug and shifting slightly to the side to make room for his friend to sit.

“So? How was it?”

“What?”

“Dinner with the fisher heartthrob”

“What?” he repeated, brows pushing closer in confusion.

Yunhyeong just waved him in dismissal “I’m kidding. I’m just asking how was Junmyeon last night”

“Oh, uh… Ok? I guess” he shrugged, taking a tentative sip from his coffee.

“I heard he had to deal with one of the Emerald guys again”

“The what?”

“The Emerald, the ship that got the weird missing catch?” Junhoe started frowning again, seriously lost in the conversation. Yunhyeong mirrored his expresion “The one with the guys now disappearing? The fucked up one? Are you serious?” 

“Oh-Ohhh, that one? Didn’t know that was the name”

“Of course not, when are you ever aware of your surroundings?”

He gave his friend a dirty look for that, but it was kind of true.

“Whatever, what about this ship then? The guys from it? Yeah, I think he’s had to go with one of them twice” He shifted in his place on the carpet, resting his back against the couch. They could be sitting properly on it but they were just way too accustomed to the floors, porches and carpets whenever they visited Yunhyeong’s little home, even when they were just two and could perfectly fit on the couch “But what missing catch?”

Yunhyeong seemed to be about to complain, probably about Junhoe’s lack of attention or something, but then just huffed and explained.

“The second week of June, when they sailed for a, I guess usual route of theirs… How little do you know, really?”

“I just know they had some issues mid sail and came back at the third day or so talking crazy shit about a glowing sea lion or whatever”

“What sea li-? You know what? Never mind” Yunhyeong waved a hand in dismissal and went back to the explaining “As far as I know, yes, they had some problems with the equipment right after the second stop and thought of cutting the trip short. They kinda took a wild shortcut through the open water and there’s where they say they found this weird fish. They tried to, well, catch it. Lost a harpoon, a net and part of their regular catch in the ordeal. Seems like the fish fought quite a bit, and if the size they said was true then, well yeah. They should have let it go, actually”

“So big? Chanyeol said something about a whale”

“So he probably said a big fish, knowing you”

He shrugged “I don’t remember, just that it was weirdly big and shiny”

Yunhyeong hummed in thought “Yeah, I mean I guess that’s why they didn’t let it go. Like, why would you try and catch a, I don’t know, a shark maybe, in the middle of the night when you know you need to get to shore asap? It must have been something really weird, right?”

“That or they were too drunk to realise they were trying to harpoon a rif?”

He startled as Yunhyeong snorted into his coffee, little splats of hot liquid exploding all over. He grumbled in displeasure under his breath, but admitted himself a smile at earning some laughs.

His friend seemed to be chuckling half against his will as he wiped his coffee stained hands on a napkin “Sometimes it’s hard to know when you are joking and when you are honestly just an idiot”

“Keeps you on your toes, huh?” he smiled, getting a friendly slap for his efforts “Well, anyway, what’s all about the missing catch then? They didn’t get it and...?”

“They said they did. Kind of. They said they had actually caught it but at the last moment some weird shit happened and made them lose it” he shrugged, face pinched with obvious disbelief “I heard my uncle say they had brought pieces back, but lost those too”

“Pieces?”

“I don’t know, I guess like a chunk of it?”

“Like a fucking fillet or something? And what, it escaped too?” he could help but laugh “What the fuck?”

“I don’t know” Yunhyeong protested in between chuckles “I’m just telling you what people say”

“Are they really going around saying this shit?”

“They were, at least” the laughter stopped abruptly, when the reality of the current situation came back to them “That’s why it’s all so strange, they were really talking crazy shit and then this started to happen, it’s all so weird”

“Chanyeol didn’t say a thing about any piece of magic dolphin, though, and he helped them unload”

“Huh, weird. He’d remember something like that, he loves weird stuff”

“Maybe this one got too creepy”

“It did” Yunhyeong nodded “What about Donghyuk?”

“What about him?”

“He was there too. He helped them dock”

Junhoe blinked in slight confusion “He was? Since when is he helping fishers outta his clique? And at such hour? Here at the north coast?”

His friend shrugged “Beats me. But apparently he was waiting for them at the docks”

“Well… I mean he’s kinda odd anyway but…”

“I don’t know, maybe he was around and noticed they had problems, who knows. Thing is he helped them, apparently”

Junhoe hummed, shifting a little to get more comfortable. Yunhyeong took his phone from his pocket and mumbled something about Chanwoo and a baseball game, occupying himself with their younger friend and what looked like an official ticketing page.

Junhoe on his part stared right into the black screen of the tv on the wall, trying and failing not to get more creeped out by the whole drowning crew thing. What if these guys had gotten themselves involved in some really shady shit? But how? At one of the only two ports they stopped at? What if they brought some kind of gang troubles into their small city? What if this was some weird mainland mafia adjusting matters? He really hoped not.

* * *

137

It was just days later when he got a call from Yunhyeong at 11pm. He wasn’t really surprised as it wasn’t that out of the norm for them to talk to each other until very late, but just not through phone calls. He was surprised, though, when the first thing his friend said was-

“ _ Have you seen Chanyeol? _ ” 

He frowned slightly, putting his tea mug down on the table “Uh, no? I mean, when?”

“ _ Today, the last hours? Have you talked to him? _ ” he sounded slightly agitated, and that in turn made Junhoe nervous.

“N-no, last time I saw him was yesterday when I helped him with his truck, why? Something wrong?”

“ _ Uh, no, I mean nothing happened, it’s just- _ ” the other sighed sharply “ _ It’s… It seems someone tried to attack Junmyeon and now he can’t reach Yeol and he’s kinda worried _ ”

“What? What do you mean  _ attack _ ? What happened?”

“ _ I don’t know for sure, seems like someone tried to knock him last night near a pub. He says he didn’t make much of it because there had been some ruffle inside before, but now Chanyeol went MIA and he’s worried… I don’t know, he’s worried it has something to do with these Emerald dudes somehow _ ”

“How? Why would-?”

“ _ How would I know? _ ” Yunhyeong complained in a whiny tone “ _ He thinks they might be targeting anyone involved with them. Myeon worked few times with one of them this last month and Yeol helped them unload that time-... I don’t know _ ”

“So you say this might be a gang thing after all?” he might have sounded a bit more agitated than he wanted.

“ _ I don’t know June, he’s just worried _ ” he heard a sharp puff of air from the other side “ _ I mean, Chanyeol has gone under the radar for hours on end before, it’s just that given the whole situation… _ ”

“Yeah I-I get it” he stuttered, admittedly uneasy at the idea of his friend being in trouble just for being the helpful oaf he always was “I’ll try to call him of something”

“ _ Alright, call Myeon if you know anything, ok? He was really out of it _ ”

Well it’s not like Junmyeon didn’t get worried half the time anyway. He was kind of a mother hen to his siblings. But it was true that the last month’s situation painted everything a different color. 

He tried calling Chanyeol a few times, but his call would bounce to voicemail immediately. Nothing unheard of, actually. His friend, much like he himself honestly, oftentimes forgot his charger or failed to notice his low battery and ended up with a dead phone at random points of the day. Junhoe tried reassuring himself of this as he tried calling some of the young mechanic's friends, but by the third call without signs of his friend, he was admittedly worried. 

He stood up impulsively when he heard the fourth call connect and an unknown voice speak, but as he did so he caught the hem of his hoodie on a crooked nail sticking out from the back of the chair, pulling at it and dragging the chair noisily a few inches. He cursed under his breath and tugged his clothes free sharply. That goddamned chair, he really needed to fix it- 

“ _ Hello _ ” the deep voice rolled the word out, probably for the second time, and Junhoe’s brain blanked for a second.

“Uh, hi, I’m… T-This is June, I’m…” he cleared his throat, trying to ease the tension out of it and get his nerves sorted. This dude was not an acquaintance of Junhoe himself, he only got his number because of a one time ocasion group chat Baekhyun had made for Chanyeol’s last birthday and remembered this particular guy being a close friend of the mechanic. He didn’t even remember the name and now felt all kinds of weird suddenly calling him, especially with such introduction. His worry for his friend had made him hit the contact without hesitation but now he was kind of regretting it, maybe he was overreacting and now he was bothering a total stranger at almost midnight. Shit, well, too late for regrets now “I’m a friend of Chanyeol?”

There was silence on the other side, and Junhoe started fidgeting with his socked toes as he hovered near his bedroom door “Uh-um, hello?”

“ _ Yeah? _ ” the voice was back, and he wasn’t sure if the guy was sleepy, annoyed or just talked with such apathy normally.

Junhoe huffed away from the phone before trying to sort things out “Y-yeah, look I’m sorry for the hour I just… We’re trying to, uh, contact Chanyeol and he’s not answering his phone and… M-maybe you know of him? Or… I don’t know” wait, was the guy even from their town? What if he was from the mainland and here was Junhoe asking if he had seen Chanyeol and-?

“ _ Oh _ ” the guy chuckled, soft and deep and… Strangely unbothered “ _ Is Junmyeon looking for him? _ ”

“Uh… Yeah”

The chuckles continued and then “ _ Yeol, you big dork, check your phone _ ”

Then Junhoe heard him in the distance, another deep voice, just louder and less elegant “ _ What? My phone? _ ”

“ _ Oh god _ ” the first voice laughed softly “ _ I’ll get him to contact Junmyeon, don’t worry. I’m sorry he’s like this _ ”

“Oh! Oh no, it’s ok, we know he’s an idiot” he admitted, way too relieved and annoyed to care “Just, geez, just tell him I said he’s an idiot please”

“ _ Ah, _ ” the littlest sound, some rustle and then the smooth voice again, calm as ever “ _ This friend of yours says you’re a big fucking idiot and next time you do this shit I’m allowed to kick your ass _ ” then Chanyeol was loudly complaining unintelligible things and the unknown friend was back to Junhoe “ _ Done, thank you for your worry June” _

“No, thanks for…” for what? Picking up? Maybe? “For helping”

The soft chuckle was back, and Junhoe found himself smiling, breathing easily again. 

* * *

147

“But do you think we should worry?” he asked, walking up to the edge of the rocky outcrop and flopping down on his ass.

“I don’t know, I still believe it was just a dude mistaking Junmyeon for somebody else” Chanwoo sat beside him, then Yunhyeong at the far end “Is he still worried?”

“Yeah” Yunhyeong commented “Seems to be really uneasy about this whole thing. But I get it, he works with these people and they are actually showing up dead. It’s really bad”

“Has anyone contacted the two other dudes?”

Chanwoo peered down to the water washing up the rocks, meter or so below “I don’t know, but they’re still around. I saw one yesterday at the port market” he leaned back again quickly, a visible shiver running over him.

“What about Donghyuk?”

“No clue” the younger shrugged “Haven’t seen him for a while now”

Junhoe couldn’t really say that was surprising, the guy was rather evasive and kept to his own a lot, worked the south docks with a rather specific group of people and no one else. They weren’t really sure what was his deal but he seemed to be a decent guy. The very few times Junhoe had seen him he had found him somehow grim and lonely looking, with sharp eyes set cold and a small frowning mouth. But talking to him proved a very different story. The Donghyuk he had met was warm and kind and had a very soft voice and honest eyes. It’s just that his demeanor could take very quick turns and he just kept to his group of people very tightly since he arrived to the island some years ago. Didn’t help that he came up north only once every three weeks or so, apparently to visit some acquaintance or purchase some specific goods or other speculations of the sorts.

“Not like we see him that often” Yunhyeong was saying softly, almost tentatively “but… I mean he does have like a schedule, and he hasn’t been... Maybe we could…? You know, just to be sure” Both Junhoe and Chanwoo turned to look at him in question “Well, I mean, it’s not like he has a lot of friends around here or whatever, right? I’m just saying we could just… Make sure he’s still kicking”

“I’m sure he has friends, Yun, you just don’t know them”

Junhoe shrugged “He surely has some down south, right?”

“I just mean-” Yunhyeong huffed exasperated “Forget it”

Chanwoo side glanced Junhoe, a funny expression on his face that Junhoe couldn’t really fathom. He raised an eyebrow in question but his friend only raised both to him. It was confusing but Chanwoo didn’t seem to care, he just turned back to Yunhyeong.

“Well, if you really want to make sure we could go check on him. If the hill will not come to the prophet, the prophet shall go to the hill, right?” he said, his voice weirdly sing-songy, a foreboding sign of mischief in the waters. Junhoe was still out of the loop, though “Want to pay him a visit?”

“No, no” the older of the three clicked his tongue in mild annoyance “I was just saying, you know, we were worrying about the people involved and just thought, has anyone thought of him? That’s all but-”

“I thought we had ruled out that theory?” Chanwoo interrupted, smile evident in his voice “Chanyeol was just with a friend after all-”

“Listen, forget about it, ok?” Yunhyeong stopped him, frantically waving both hands between them as if to disperse the topic.

The youngest of them snickered but dropped the subject, glancing down the rocks again and kicking his legs funnily before dragging his ass back a few paces “We are we sitting on the edge?”

“Ah, you big coward”

“What, is there any need? We could go to the pier of maybe a park? Why are we always around here, it’s all humid and sticky and yuck”

“Don’t be like that, Junhoe likes to come by the ocean, we go to parks and cafes too. We even go with you to that gamer cafe you like”

“You can’t fall and drown in a cafe”

“Don’t be dramatic”

“I’m being realistic-”

“ _ Oh! _ ” Junhoe gasped, turning towards Yunhyeong and pointing a very accusatory finger to him, big smile on his face “You like Donghyuk!”

* * *

177

If he had to be honest, he liked the south coast. Odd opinion? Maybe for a guy like him; he loved the city, enjoyed being able to go out at ass o’clock and find a store open, having the cinema and the mall and all the cafes he needed plus one. He got the buses (although something could be said about the night service of  _ some _ ) and taxis and delivery food that his lazy ass wanted and enough people to not really care for people. Enough youth and noise to feel just about fine in his skin. The ocean, though, was a bit sad on their side. The harbors were, for starters, a little far away, and then took over the majority of the accessible shoreline. It left him with only so many little nooks to sit and relax by the water, hearing it murmur and rock, smelling it removed from the fish and the boats, feeling the mist without the smoke and the noise. 

Now, as he walked towards the docks at the south coast, he could see differently. The vast blue stretching in sight long and wide, only a handful of boats docking to the piers. The port was small, much smaller than the one at the north. The whole town was smaller, quieter. It felt older and, in a way, uncanny. But that might be his city boy soul feeling out of place. The shores, on the other hand, were his respite. Just from the bus he could see the long line of water touching the rocky beaches below the line of trees following the road. It was open and clear, unlike the cluster of buildings on his north. It felt somehow more free, clean, restful. His own peace of mind, the same he could feel in his little rocky outcrops back home, here felt wider and deeper, as if he could  _ hear  _ the ocean better.

Now they were walking up to the little shack near the last fishing pier of the lot, where he could see in the distance a few figures holding their fishing rods. The seagulls were even calmer here, maybe because there wasn’t as much fish and trash piling around.

“No, wait, wait” Yunhyeong’s voice brought him back from his thoughts “I-I think we better go back, yeah”

They were just few meters away from the shack, the little cabin beside the tall walled shed that seemed to keep several parts of boats of varying sizes. They had been told by Junmyeon that Donghyuk was often hanging out around there, as he was close with the mechanics of the area. The little cabin had its door open, and Junhoe could hear people inside, voices filtering out merrily, young.

“Ah, come on, Yun. Don’t tell me you are getting cold feet now? We came all the way down here!” Chanwoo pushed at their friend’s back, looking and sounding the most enthusiastic of the three so far “Come on! Let’s go, we can’t turn back now” he whined, high pitched and stubborn. 

Yunhyeong didn’t seem convinced though, he was already pulling out of Chanwoo’s hold and stepping back towards the road.

“No, this was a stupid idea, I shouldn’t have agreed to this. Let’s go back, this is pointless-”

“We’re literally steps away, Yun, come on!”

“Why are you so insistent, Chanwoo? I’m telling you I don’t want to do this, it’s not gonna go well” 

“Yun! Come on, you can’t give up without trying-”

“Guys…”

“Stop it, Chan!”

“But-!”

“Excuse me, is there a problem?”

Junhoe startled at the new voice, felt a little spike of embarrassment at their silly bickering getting attention from a local. He turned to see a pair of young looking guys staring at them. At least they looked more curious than annoyed. Both were on the short-ish side, or maybe it was Junhoe’s perspective, he’d hurt quite a number of prides in his young-adulthood by voicing these type of thoughts. But nevermind that, these two were shorter than him, at least. One of them was looking at his friends with a curly, almost kitten-ish smile on his face, the other had heavy set eyebrows over big eyes set unwaveringly on them all. No smile on that one, just a minimal frown on his mouth.

“Uh…” he looked back at his friends, but they looked still a bit too caught off guard to respond. Time to be a functional social individual, then “I’m sorry, we didn’t mean to cause a scene”

The first guy hummed something like a question, then smiled wider, his eyes curving gently “Oh, don’t worry, just tryin’a make sure you were not fighting”

“No!” Yunhyeong coughed a little, clearing his throat “No, sorry, we were just… Having some disagreements”

“We-we’re friends, it’s ok” Chanwoo butted in, uncharacteristically shy while sticking to Yunhyeong’s side “Sorry for being loud”

The guy laughed kindly “Oh, don’t I know of friendly banter, eh? Don’t you think?” he elbowed the guy at his side (who was still eyeing them, by the way, and it was getting unnerving).

The second man hummed deeply, a single nod of his head “Sure” he agreed curtly.

That seemed good enough for the smiling one, who turned back to them “Alright, so, was there any particular reason you were playing fight right outside the cabin?”

The smile was still there as his tone was pretty much still friendly, but something felt suddenly tense in Junhoe’s spine. It was like being slightly scolded by someone you didn’t know. He looked at his friends again and noted that Chanwoo was shaking his head vehemently while Yunhyeong looked embarrassed and annoyed at the same time. 

Well, there went their plans. If he didn’t meddle.

“Well,” he started quickly, before Yunhyeong could drag them away “we were actually looking for someone. We were told he usually spends a lot of time here”

He could feel his friends’ eyes on him, and the two strangers were now zeroing on his face too. Junhoe was very sure he was starting to get a bit red on the face.

“That so? Who?” the smiling man asked, still in a pleasant tone that Junhoe, for some reason, feared to lose. Were they looking suspicious in any way? Maybe they came across shady because they were not from the town? The way the two locals were both standing squared in front of them, staring them down almost without blinking, it was a bit scary, smile and all.

“Uh, um, it’s… We were just trying to… We wanted to know if he was ok, actually” he blurted, trying his best to appear as inconspicuous as possible “We’re not looking for trouble, I promise” he finished, his voice fading as he immediately regretted his words.

This seemed to have caught both men off guard, as even the one behind lifted his thick eyebrows in slight surprise. A melodious laugh bubbled out of the first one, big mouth smiling in amusement.

“Oh no, I’m sorry, is this guy scaring you?” he pointed his thumb over his shoulder to the now confused second guy “He just has one of those resting bitch faces, don’t feel threatened if you didn’t do anything wrong”

“Shut up” the guy said at a length, voice deep but soft, calm.

“So, who were you looking for?”

“Uh,” he dared a last look to his friends, but they were both staring at him expectantly. Apparently he was now in charge of diplomacy “His name’s Donghyuk? Kim, I think. Kim Donghyuk?”

It was very quick, if he wasn’t so irrationally nervous and attentive he would have missed it. But the eyes of the second guy shifted slightly, very quickly, his mouth pulled minimally at a side. The first one, though, clapped his hands sharply.

“Dongdong!” he said loudly “Yes, of course, he’s here half the time. Why were you worried about him?”

“Oh, nothing, just-” how was he supposed to explain this? He barely even knew the guy in question, he wasn’t going to spill the weird deaths or his suspicions of mafia doings in the island. Should he?

“Actually,“ Chanwoo spoke up, springy and confident all of a sudden “it’s my friend here who kind of knows him and as we haven’t seen him the last days he got worried. He doesn’t have his number and-”

“Chanwoo” Yunhyeong butted, sounding alarmed for some reason.

“We just wanted to help him maybe get it” the younger finished, and Junhoe could almost see the moment the color left Yunhyeong’s face. He didn’t really understand why.

The smiling guy hummed long and light “Well, well, our Dongdong, huh?” he was now pinning his smiling eyes on Yunhyeong, who on his part looked about ready to bolt “Well, we can’t really disclose his contact information without his explicit consent but-”

Yunhyeong yelped “Ah! No, please don’t misunderstand-”

“No? Should I not? Oh sorry, I thought we were about to play matchmakers” the guy sounded almost disappointed, if only maybe exaggerated. Junhoe was already confused.

“No, no, no” Yunhyeong waved his hands frantically “I was just concerned-”

“Well then, don’t be. He’s just fine. As weird and bouncy as always, just not here right now. He must be talking to the fishys somewhere along the shore back at the rifs, I suppose”

The guy was rocking back and forth on his heels, hands on the pockets of his parka. There was a moment of silence between them all, the only person unperturbed and not confused seemingly the merry man watching Yunhyeong in amusement. After some awkward seconds, he pointed behind him, towards a trail opening between the trees at the far end of the lot. 

“He usually goes through there, some minutes of walk to the first section, if not then he walked past to the second. He likes that one because it’s lower and he can dip his feet in” he said easily, his voice much less teatrical, his smile just as kind.

Junhoe looked between them, not sure if he was understanding what was going on. Yunhyeong for his part was flaming red and looking to the trail, then back to the stranger. When he started to shake his head slowly, the man shrugged “Or we could wait for him here. We were about to have some tea, wanna join?”

\--

Junhoe often wondered if this was how normal people made acquaintances or if he was just winging it and bouncing around aimlessly until someone found him amusing enough to keep around. 

After the painfully awkward encounter moments before, they were now all sitting on crates and stools in the shed behind the cabin, tin cups and two mugs of tea in hands. Yunhyeong seemed to have overcome his mortification and was now chattering animatedly with the smiley guy, who happened to be named Jongdae, while Chanwoo butted in from time to time. 

Junhoe on his part was content enough with listening and sipping at his drink, running his eyes through what looked to be a mechanic’s workshop. And a very tidy one, if he had to admit. He was used to Chanyeol’s place, a whole natural disaster of the entrails of cars and bikes alike. This one, on the other hand, despite being full of chunky pieces of foreign engineering, looked way more structured and methodically arranged than his friend’s clutter of personal organization. Granted, this place was considerably bigger, but bigger were also some of the parts of vessels inside and out.

It was in his half hearted exploration that something picked his attention. Right behind a wide work table, was a parked bike. It wouldn’t be weird at all, could be anyone’s, the mechanic’s, whoever. But it wasn’t. It was actually Chanyeol’s. Junhoe would know, he hated it with a passion. Had hated it since the first (and last) time Chanyeol offered to give him a ride home with it. Worst experience ever, would not recommend. 

He turned around, ready to ask Chanwoo to make extra sure, but instead found himself confronted by the hard stare of the second guy, Kyungsoo. He seemed to be less scrutinizing now, at least, but equally intense.

“What?” the guy asked, no beating around the bush whatsoever.

“Nothing,” he started, then figured might as well try for some bluntness too “That bike back there, it’s Chanyeol’s, right?”

A fleeting look over Junhoe’s shoulder and then a curt nod “Yeah, that’s his. You know him?” he asked, but immediately after his eyes went round, shifting his entire face to something way softer and less threatening “Oh, wait a minute, are you June?”

Slightly taken aback, Junhoe missed the connection until Kyungsoo smiled at him, turning himself into a fucking kid and laughing quietly “I thought your voice sounded familiar, are you or not?”

He nodded, still trying to connect the dots.

“You called me the other day, asking for Chanyeol, remember?”

Oh. 

“Oh”

\--

The day was really turning out to be full of surprises. Barely half an hour after they had joined the two mechanics, the sky had started grumbling and darkening at alarming speed. This time there had been no warning of damp spell or warmth, simply a building sense of humidity and tense static in the air, distant thunder deep in the sky, the sun went off behind the clouds and the next thing they knew, thick curtains of water engulfing the whole view.

They pondered waiting it out, as they had brought no umbrellas nor raincoats along. Wind was starting to pick up quickly and the local mechanics had told them it was not the best to stick to the workshop if the storm didn’t let on. They had to close up and secure everything in case the weather got worse.

“How did you get here?” Jongdae was asking while pulling thick plastic covers over some of their equipment.

“By the inter bus”

“Oh boy” he secured the cover and turned to them “You do know it has limited service, right?”

“Yeah,” Yunhyeong said, checking his phone “We missed the one we were supposed to take but I didn’t expect this storm. I thought we could just wander around the town until the next one but-” as if on purpose, the loud thunder cracked above, the wind hitting at the shut windows “Well…”

“Tell you what, let’s go get some food, it’s almost time for dinner anyway”

“How?”

“My truck’s around, we fit” Kyungsoo said calmly, locking the shutters of the big window on a side “We can go to Jongdae’s, has more space”

The three of them exchanged a very brief look, there was still some misgivings, the two men were little more than strangers to them still. But having one of them be close to Chanyeol did bring some reassurance to Junhoe, at least. Should be ok.

\--

The night bore no better weather. On the contrary, the sky had turned a very tumultuous texture of bulky clouds, flashing angrily along the thunder. The rain had stopped for a moment, but only to give way to a wind sharp and insistent as gelid and wet. It wasn’t looking good in the long run either, or so had Jongdae said.

“It’s in for a while, I gamble” had been his words, looking from the window in his tiny kitchen, hands deep in the warm soapy water of the dishes.

The bus was to set out in ten minutes, but if the storm didn’t subdue at least some, it would be actually dangerous to try and drive them, not to mention going on foot. They were all pendant on some window, watchful of the very moment the sky would give them some respite to make a run for the bus terminal. It just wasn’t coming.

“Guys this is getting worse by the minute. I think it’s-” Chanwoo stopped abruptly in time with a thunder, just before the howling and pushing of the wind was joined again by the cushion of white noise of heavy rain. He sighed and looked away form the cascading water on the window “Well”

Junhoe felt his shoulders drop, eyes going to Yunhyeong for some help, but the guy in question was running a hand over his face in apparent exasperation, uncovering his eyes only to look in frustration at the pouring rain outside.

“What now?” Junhoe asked anyway, trying to keep his annoyed tone at bay “Do we borrow a boat or what?”

Yunhyeong chuckled but looked to be still very much upset “I don’t know, we could try make a run but I seriously doubt we’ll make it on time anyway”

“If the service is not suspended at this rate” Jongdae piped from the kitchen.

“Right” he sighed, dropping down on a pale, worn out couch beside Chanwoo.

“Listen, just wait it out some more” the mechanic offered.

“We already lost our way back until-” Yunhyeong checked his phone, but the local walked in, smile on, and saved him the trouble.

“Nah, don’t bother. Next one is first hour tomorrow morning”

The collective groaning from the three of them seemed to amuse their host to full laughter. It was his friend who offered them a solution.

“Just wait the night” he said, calm and soft as all Junhoe had heard of him so far. At their questioning looks, he added “Look, just wait until this storm settles, then I take one of you with me, I have a big couch at home. The other two stay here, Dae must have extra blankets or pillows around for you”

“Sure thing” the guy nodded enthusiastically.

Junhoe was not entirely sure about the arrangement, they barely knew these guys. But he was also very sure he was not going to be able to word these concerns in a polite way, so, as usual, he turned to Yunhyeong for directions. 

His friend, on his part, seemed also doubtful “But… I mean, we just met each other, are you really letting us stay?”

Well… Not exactly Junhoe’s concern, but close enough.

Jongdae didn’t seem bothered in the least “Nonsense! Come on, tall and handsome here is friends with Yeollie, you know Myeonnie and I don’t know about the little one but I can’t distrust such a cute face”

As much as his statement made little sense and seemed held together by nothing but thin air, the other mechanic was nodding along with a little smile on his face. Despite the oddity of it all, Junhoe was secretly relieved, it was really cold and the storm was getting really worrying, he wasn’t complaining for getting a place to sleep it through.

They agreed on varying levels of hesitation, but before things could get awkward again, Jongdae clapped his hands and announced he was making a round of coffee and he was letting them pick a movie to spend the time. When he added he had chocolate chip cookies to share Junhoe shed all his remaining doubts about the arrangement.

\--

It was still raining, but the weather was immensely milder than two hours before. The sprinkle of cold water was running quickly over the windshield, and Junhoe kept track of some stray drops before the wipers swiped them all away. Mind numbing but distracting, as he was trying to overcome the discomfort of being alone in a car with an almost stranger who seemed to be as socially awkward as him. Or just seriously quiet.

He had agreed to be the one driving with Kyungsoo under the sound logic that he was Chanyeol’s friend. If he didn’t protest staying at their houses by that same logic he couldn’t for this either, he supposed.

Yunhyeong and Chanwoo had stayed at Jongdae’s with the reassurance of a call to Junmyeon under the pretense of letting him know they were stuck in the south with the storm, just in case he had another sudden episode of motherly worry. It ended up bringing peace of mind to everyone involved. It was, in Junhoe’s opinion, a genius move from Chanwoo’s mastermind.

So now here he was, considerably more settled but still feeling very much out of place as they drove on the dark, dead streets of the town, nothing but the rain and the truck’s rumble to make noise. Junhoe considered starting conversation several times, but the stoic aura of his companion just wouldn’t let him unwind enough to utter a word. That’s why it came as a mild surprise when the mechanic himself started one, clearly not nearly as uncomfortable as Junhoe was feeling.

“So, you guys know Donghyuk?”

It was a weird call back on a topic they had barely discussed, but it was the reason they had traveled all the way down there after all. It was reasonable to be curious, he supposed.

“Well, not really?” he shrugged lightly, throwing a side glance at the other, who kept his eyes firm on the road “He’s more like an acquaintance, we’ve spoken a few times but he doesn’t really frequent the north bay much”

“No, he doesn’t” Kyungsoo agreed quietly “So, why suddenly come down here?”

“We told you guys, we were just trying to help Yunhyeong… Uh, know him better, I guess?”

“Quite a trip to do so”

“No, not really. It’s not… I mean, if not for the storm it wouldn’t have been such a long one”

“Donghyuk does go regularly, if not frequently, up north, though. Why not wait until he showed up?”

“I just-” he shrugged again, feeling a little put out by the mild interrogatory “I guess he didn’t see him when he was supposed to and got worried, I don’t know”

“Your friend?”

“Yeah, look he really just wanted to be sure he was fine. He’s kind of a worrywart like Junmyeon, and… And well, he kind of…” he stumbled a little over his thoughts, wanting to stop the guy’s questioning but not sure if it was his place to speak. Then again, they had kind of already spilled, hadn’t they? Should be ok “He does kind of like this guy, so…” 

Kyungsoo hummed deeply, face set on a neutral scowl. Junhoe wasn’t sure what to make of it, but a sudden idea came to him and made him very uncomfortable all of a sudden. He hadn’t really thought of it before, maybe over accustomed to the friendly, welcoming aura of the other mechanic, Jongdae.

“That’s not an issue with you, is it?” he asked, blunt as he knew to be when he cared to.

To his surprise and relief though, Kyungsoo chuckled easily “Oh no, don’t you worry” his face settled down back to his severe neutrality “Just curious, Donghyuk isn’t really a people’s person when out of town, usually doesn't even like traveling outside. It struck me odd to have people coming down to look for him at all”

“Oh” he offered “I guess you are right, he really doesn’t talk too much with anyone” 

Junhoe only knew Donghyuk because of Yunhyeong, in fact. His friend was a very social, friendly guy and he worked at his family’s restaurant near the docks. Donghyuk just happened to have few meals there the times he visited and Yunhyeong, being himself, engaged him in conversation. Or, that’s what Junhoe had thought all this time. Now though, he understood that his friend’s perseverance on talking with the other guy had had some ulterior motivations. Absolute valid motivations, anyway; as far as he knew, Donghyuk had never turned Yunhyeong’s company down. In fact he had made a habit of having at least a meal at the restaurant every time he passed through town... And Yunhyeong always looked especially chipper when that happened… Well, Junhoe  _ was  _ really a bit blind, wasn’t he?

“He’s a good kid” he heard Kyungsoo’s voice, low and deep, mumble from the side. He wasn’t sure he was meat to hear or respond, so he just nodded his head in silence “He just…” 

Junhoe waited for the rest, but after some seconds of quiet driving, he looked to his companion to find him completely absorbed back on the road. 

\--

Chanyeol was still rolling on the wide couch, face scrunched in laughter.

“Your face, I can’t-” he wheezed, slapping some cushions for good measure.

“Why was I supposed to assume you’d be here?” he protested, loudly, face flushed “What are you even doing here?”

“And what about it?” Chanyeol rebutted, also louder than just a moment ago.

“Keep it down you two” the short mechanic chastited crossedly “Of course I get the earthquakes, I always get the earthquakes” he mumbled grumpily, carrying the extra blankets from the hallway.

They made quick work of the couch for Junhoe and before he realised he was on borrowed soft joggers and a worn tee, looking at a small but cozy looking improvised bed.

Kyungsoo was washing up for bed while Chanyeol was fuzzing some extra more over Junhoe.

“I could lend you a hoodie, you are close to the window, maybe you’ll get cold”

“No, I’m fine, there are like four blankets there already”

“Sure? I’m not having you sick, dude, it’s like you’re under my responsibility or some shit, no?”

“No” he frowned in confusion “Why would I be?”

“Dunno, just feels weird having you here… I mean what are you guys even doing here?”

Oh, here it went again “We were just trying to check on someone”

“Someone from here? Who do you even know around?”

“Just… It’s not like I know him much, but… You know Donghyuk?”

“Dong… Oh, the kid- Yeah, I think I know him”

“You  _ think _ ? He helped the crew of the Emerald with you that last time, didn’t he?”

“Uh” Chanyeol inclined his head slightly to a side, like a dog trying to figure something out “Oh, you’re right, he was there! But he just-”

“Yeol, you need to be up early, come on” Kyungsoo interrupted suddenly, peeking from the short hallway and looking ready for bed “You too, June, if you guys want to catch the early bus”

“Ah, sure, yeah” he shifted in place before finally sitting on the couch-bed, while Chanyeol simply called a loud  _ ‘night! _ and sauntered to the hallway.

Kyungsoo hovered at the threshold for a moment longer, eyes on Junhoe, as if unsure about something he wanted to say. Junhoe himself felt slightly uncomfortable under the heavy stare and cleared his throat “Uh, thank for letting me stay” he ventured.

That seemed to bring his host back from his musings, he nodded and stepped back “Good night, June” he said, already gone.

* * *

187

“Stop being a baby, it’s less money!” the tall mechanic waved a toast in his direction, voice loud even drenched in sleep.

“I don’t care, I’m not riding on that cursed bike all the way back home!” he argued, equally loud and equally sleepy, just not waving his hand because there was coffee there.

“Kyungsoo, speak some sense into this idiot!”

“Leave him alone, Yeol” was his answer, sounding for all accounts resigned but somehow still soft. The short man was in the kitchen since they all woke up, had only approached to give Junhoe his mug and toast, then returned to his place by the stove, completely immersed in his phone. There was a slight pinch in his brow, but Junhoe was in no place to make assumptions on someone he barely knew.

Chanyeol protesting under his breath was background noise while he checked his own phone, reading the messages in their group chat.

**Yoyo**

Good morning June~

Slept well with the scary one?

We’re up and ready to go any minute, Jongdae is driving us round 9

Im up since 7

**Chan**

is the world ending?

shut up, i just woke up, dunno why

**Yoyo**

Prolly bc it’s an unfamiliar place, slept well?

Yeah actually. like a rock

**Yoyo**

Great! see you at the terminal then, please behave!

He didn’t dignify that with an answer, opting to focus on his breakfast and the pleasant warmth of the sun coming from the window just beside him. The sky had cleared up amazingly, now bright blue with barely a wisp of clouds in sight. The sun was heavy in its morning warmth, and Junhoe was soaking up on it like a fucking plant. He wondered if the storm of the previous night had served to clean up the air, and if maybe it had wrecked any type of havoc somewhere. The winds had been really scary, he thought for a moment of the workshop down the docks, they were so close to the shore, would it be alright? But the short local seemed unperturbed last night. Only now he looked concerned, maybe someone had told them the bad news? Oh, Chanyeol’s bike was down there too, so it wasn’t likely or he’d have said something along their bickering. 

He was about to ask Chanyeol when the man turned in his seat toward the kitchen “Soo” he called softly, waiting for the other to answer. When that didn’t happen, he repeated, slightly louder “Soo?”

Junhoe glanced the same way, seeing as the petit mechanic simply stared at his phone, brow still furrowed.

“Kyungsoo” Chanyeol insisted, deep voice now asking attention. It sounded demanding, but Junhoe knew it was just him being concerned. The big oaf was intense but truly a worrywart on his own way.

The short man finally looked up, and noting both visitors staring he apologized and walked closer. 

“All good?” Chanyeol asked, voice unusually mild.

“Yeah, yeah, what did you need?”

“Just wanted to ask if there was any coffee left but you look-”

“I’m fine Yeol, and yeah, there’s still some left” he placed his phone on the table and pulled a chair to sit, just stopping last second to ask “Want me to get you some?”

“Nah, I can, was just asking” he said, standing up and positively towering over the other, but dropping a big hand on his shoulder. 

For a moment they stopped, looking at each other straight to the eyes, and it felt so strangely private that Junhoe felt all kinds of uncomfortable looking. He dropped his eyes to the table, fixing his attention on the tablecloth and then the short mechanic's phone resting on it. This was why he was able to catch just the moment it started ringing, or rather humming, vibrating as the screen lit up with an incoming call. It was just a flash, a second before Kyungsoo’s hand was snatching it from the table and walking away, the name  _ Donghyuk  _ ghosting in his eyes just for a blink. Junhoe heard the mechanic picking up the call, tackling the person down with an urgent “ _ Where are you? Where have you been-? _ ” that was cut off the moment he shut the door to his room.

Junhoe didn’t want to assume anything, but he was kind of starting to pile up the oddities.

He didn’t dwell on it, though, breaking from his thoughts at Chanyeol’s voice hollering from the kitchen, mere meters away “ _ More coffee? _ ”

\--

It’d be around nine in the evening, his home smelling of coffee and the mexican take out he had just finished, when his phone buzzed with a new message in their group chat. Chanwoo had sent them a news link of some sorts, as odd as that was. He opened the chat in mild curiosity, almost expecting a gaming tournament announcement or something of the sorts, then felt confused for a short instance, and finally his stomach dipped in unsettling heaviness. 

How had it not crossed his mind at all? 

**Chanumon**

Guys

_ -Breaking News: Another body found at the south bay this early morning- _

_ The body of Park Hongsuk (38), former regular crew of... (keep reading) _

He set the phone down on the table, sighing in unease.

“Well, fuck”

* * *

_ 187 _

The water was calm, reverberating deep and placid in its continuous flow. The moon was bare and bright, lonely and up in the dark sky, surrounded by pale, shredded clouds that isolated her from the stars, dim and speckled apart. But alone and all, she shone so bright and white that the glitter in the water came to life as far as his eyes could see. And that, you should know, was really far.

But it was not the lively shimer of the ocean what was holding his attention hostage. It was another glimmer, silver but also dull, void of its color in the pale night, ripped from its life by silvers more cruel and blunt, but sharp and vivid. A handful, barely half his palm, of thin, shiny scales reflecting the sad moon on their discolored surfaces. He shifted his hand, the light moved languidly over the little pieces, it didn’t jump anymore, didn’t have where, they were dead.

They were, but not  _ him _ . He closed his fist, breathing deeply. He felt the eyes on him, had felt them for a while. Silver. More silver, but very, very different. Deep, intense, threatening silver reflecting the light like nothing else did. Not the water and not the dead glimmer in his hand. 

Water splashed gently, something wet tapped the rocks beside him. Softly.

“How is he?” he asked, voice caught and tight. He hadn’t realised how worked up he had gotten.

The water splashed with a little more force, a spec of silver, the playful one in the water, the work of the moon. 

“He’s a’ight. He’ll be a’ight” the voice was a rough sound, rocks against rocks, coarse and thick with accent “Let those go, ‘s nothin’”

Half an advise, half a warning. Another man, another person, another creature would have felt and abided to the taut pull of danger in the voice, in the air moving between them. Not him.

“Have there been words from that old bastard?” he pushed further, feeling the tiny pieces digging into his palm. Dead, but still resilient.

The water rushed, splashed, just a little, a moment of air in movement. More silver, the playful one, and now also the dangerous one. Full and deep, like fluid mercury deep in the darkness. Sharp but round, yet narrowed. The eyes of a cat you would say if you didn’t know. A very perilous assumption, the last cat you would ever see, probably.

“Let go of those” the voice insisted, rough and harsh. It held a warning but not a threat “He’s fine. Promise. ‘S no point in keepin’ those, those’re nothin’. They dead, kid, dead skin, dead scales”

He worked his throat, parched and tight, his eyes smarted a little “But he’s-”

Something shifted, water splashed, a weight on the rocks, the presence suddenly closer, heavier. The silver was at his side. Deep mercury in the night, the pinkish glimmer in the silver eyes. Soul piercing disks of stolen light pinned on him like blind mirrors. A cat’s eyes, but not.

He barely blinked at this all, but avoided looking into the cold liquid silver of the one looking at him. 

“Give’em to me” a shape poked into his sight, palm up, demanding “Give me, enough”

He did. The command was as clear as the bright moon above them. He reached out, downturned his fist, opened his fingers and let the scales fall, feeling as if something else was leaving him too. He sniffed sharply, pushed his hand, now humid and void, into his pocket, swallowed forcefully and blinked the tears away.

“I just wanna know what’s gonna happen-”

“He’ll be fine” sharp and intrusive, clearly an annoyed tone. Then a moment, stretched in a silence that meant pondering “Go home, get some sleep. ’S not your fault kid, dat's dat”

“You-”

“He says so, enough. Go”

Before he could say more, the presence was ripped off, a movement of air, a void at his side. Water splashed, glimmers of silver, playful silver under the moon. Then it was all gone. 

The forever ocean swaying under the moon, bright and bare in the sky. The sound of the silence mere sloshes and bugs. The glimmers now only on the water, the only silver left.

The water was calm, Donghyuk wished he could say the same for himself.

  
  



	2. II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright. I don't know if this was truly ready, but I just wanted to make this story MOVE. I might be one step closer to writer's-block-land and total regret, I hope and wish and pray to Junhoe's eyebrows that it won't be the case but... We'll see.
> 
> Anyway, something I didn't mention before but maybe should because it kinda matters and I don't know if it'll be confusing so just in case: ITALICS. They will mean something else in this work, besides the usual. Keep an eye out for when they get *weird*, there's a reason for that~
> 
> Reminder that this is a work in progress and a very messy one. Also that it is not beta'd, and that feedback is still appreciated, I'm blind in the fog here ;_; 
> 
> But onwards to the chapter!

237

The wall was a bit hard to grasp, cold and humid, but luckily no moss was growing on this side, so he could plant his hands flat and grip onto the grooves to help his balance. His feet were not very stable, the ground uneven and slippery and worn by water into smooth surfaces, so he was treading with more care than his usual trips to the outcrops right near the beach. Call him stubborn, but he really wanted to enjoy his time and the people gathering over the pale sand was pretty annoying. 

He was really considering giving up and going back, but he also really didn’t want to. His special spot was honestly ruined by the noise and ruckus of the people, and he was admittedly angry at that. It was _ their _spot. Was it silly? Maybe, who cared. He had a right to be pissed off, it had taken him a while to find the perfect place to enjoy the ocean away from the pollution of the ports but still close enough for it to be convenient. And since then it had never failed him. 

Now that he thought about it, how long had it been already? Like four years? Yeah, it had been that time he had broken up with his last girlfriend. It’s not like he'd gone to cry by the beach no, he was out to get drunk. He hadn’t always been a water fairy, as Junmyeon had once innocently called him, he had been just a normal brat with normal aversion to the smells and humidity and birds yapping near the ocean. He had enjoyed his minutes at the beach and that was enough. It’s just that at some point, things started to change. That particular time he had stormed in frustration to the docks just to get himself some liquor without questions asked, he knew Chanyeol was helping around and the guy had never failed to shortcutting some good booze for few bills for him there.

Strangely he never made it to the drinks. On his way, walking along the tracks to the market, he felt himself cooling off. His mind let go of his agitation, of the looping memories running through his head, and simply tuned into the quiet from below the rails. He saw the docks, and then the open water. And then he stopped walking. Something in the vast blue soothed his temper like a waterfall on a lit match. Immediate. Like its immense extension dwarfed his silly problems and tantrums, snubbed his impulse for numbness and called for him to breathe and stop, to contemplate and rest his soul. 

That night he had sat himself on the very tracks and watched the boats and little ships glide, the lights reflect on the dark water as night fell. When he returned home, he couldn’t even remember he was upset before.

From then on, everytime he was troubled, he went to the shore, and it never, not once failed to soothe his nerves. Soon he was walking down the wooden walkway on any day, for any reason. Looking for a place where he would not be bothered by the noise of people and motor of boats. Then he was taking Yunhyeong and Chanwoo along. At some point it became their place, _ his _ place, his space, his respite. Just him and the ocean and that something that spoke to him in a language and a frequency he could not entirely pick up, but for sure felt. 

But now here he was, wobbling his way over wet rocks, risking breaking a bone just to find a place where to sit his ass and relax for a moment. It was all because that stupid fair, probably. It had taken the whole fucking lot adjacent to the actual beach and got the north side crowded and loud and now these invaders took over his poor little, rocky side over to the south of the bay. 

Sadly, he was so focused on grumbling and cursing at the usurpers that he didn’t notice the huge patch of moss he stepped on, and then he was slipping straight down a slope. He dropped almost expecting immediate pain, but the ocean took pity on his ass and he crashed on coarse sand. Still hurt, though; his knees were probably scraped, like his palms by how they prickled, maybe some bush scratches if the stinging was any clue, and some sore muscles along his spiked heartbeat.

He checked quickly for his phone, making sure it was still in one piece and working. It was, and he had in fact some new notifs. 

He got up and dusted the sand off his butt, looking back up to make sure he was not stuck. But no, the ground had a gentle enough climb by a side that he could probably go back up with little effort, the only apparent inconvenience being the messy shrubs up at the top, which he had gracelessly slipped through. He could still see the narrow trail he had been following, but this little space was nicely nested on the outer side, past the upper bushes and down the coarse dips of ground (or the mossy slope he had stepped on). It opened directly to the ocean, with nothing but a rocky mound doing the times of a low barrier. Well, talk about fucking perfect. He just made sure there was no weird bug nest in the lonely bushes at the back and corner and then dropped on the warm sand, groaning in appreciation at the encompassing warmth of the sun hitting fully over most of the few square meters of his newfound space. 

When he felt the phone vibrate in his hand again he remembered the messages.

**Yoyo**

were u at june?

chanwoo will be free in a few and im done for the day, wanna come have dinner?

june?

june im calling you in 5 if you dont answer

He groaned, rolling his eyes wildly and pulling a face at his phone as he tapped an answer

chill will ya? im fine, just went exploring along the shore

sure im down for dinner, just maybe in an hour?

i just found a nice place

**Yoyo**

where? are you still near the docks? 

is there any people near? is your signal good?

jfc Yun chill the f out ok? im fiiiiiiine

**Yoyo**

im trying! i just worry ok?

i know, but im just fine, im not that far off 

and can get back in like 10 to our normal spot

promise, if i see any weird creeper ill run and call you

**Yoyo**

well im worried you wont even notice them, knowing you

just keep an eye open, ok? please?

msg in the gc when you are coming back

He sighed, dropping a last _ ok _ before pocketing his phone again. He really just wanted to relax a little in the sun and by the water and forget for a moment of precisely _ that _. But honestly, he couldn’t be mad at Yunhyeong for being worried, as much as he could become an overbearing mother hen, he had his reasons and Junhoe himself kind of agreed. 

He at least didn’t have to deal too much with Junmyeon, that would be a proper pain in the ass, Chanyeol reminded him of it at least twice a day since… Well, just two days ago but it was enough, even though he was secretly glad there was someone keeping tracks on the loose cannon that his tall mechanic friend was. He could never, he’d go insane. He had enough already, after the previous day’s little tirade, he’d had enough. 

Why couldn’t it all have been just a silly drunken coincidence like they had thought before? But no, just two days after their trip to the south, Junmyeon had been approached by a seedy stranger again, just this time he wasn’t drunk and didn't try to pick a fight. Simply followed him very creepily all the way from the port to the pub where he could finally lose him. Weird enough on its own, but then, that very night, yet another stranger had done the very same to Chanyeol as he closed his workshop and walked home. Chanyeol though, being the ballistic dumbfuck he was, had tried to directly confront the stranger, a very dangerous move given the circumstances and even Junhoe agreed on that. But thank all heavens, the person just backed off.

And up until then they had thought well, maybe these people are after anyone involved with the Emerald crew after all. And that’s why they just didn’t understand why, two days after that (that’d be yesterday as of now), Junhoe himself had been followed by some weird guy when he walked from the bookstore he worked at towards Yunhyeong’s family dinner after his shift. 

Now, Junmyeon had been a smart cookie and attempted to lose the guy at a crowded shop and then took a cab back home, and Chanyeol had been a hot headed idiot who tried to go straight to the stalker’s nose. Junhoe, on his part, just didn’t notice he was being followed. 

It wasn’t until he had to stop to tie one of his shoelaces, just half a block away from his bus stop, that he noticed something was odd. It had felt suddenly so silent. 

It was after he resumed his walk that he realised why; he had been hearing another set of footsteps in time with his own the whole way, and whenever he stopped, the second pair did too. It was only then that he took notice of how void the street was, and just how close this person walked behind him, and just how fucking obvious they were being. That could be either because they were bad at this or they just didn’t care, which didn’t sit well with Junhoe at all.

He was lucky, just as Chanyeol had been, that his bus arrived just right then and he all but sprinted to the bus stop and jumped in. He couldn’t help himself and looked back the moment the doors shut, though, just in time to get a glimpse that would stuck to him vividly and creep him out for hours on end. He had seen the person just outside bus doors; hardened, sharp and cold eyes stuck on him. It was unclear to him still if the stranger had tried to board behind him or just had followed him to the very last step. Either way, Junhoe was freaked the hell out, his heart hadn’t stopped running for the whole bus ride, and he had been unable to stop glancing back over and over in fear of seeing them again behind him somehow.

They weren’t sure exactly why they’d go after Junhoe, but all they could think of was it being all due to their involvement with one another. Junmyeon with the crew member, Chanyeol with the day of the return... And Junhoe with the both of them? Or was it because he went looking for Donghyuk, who was also involved with their arrival? But then Yunhyeong and Chanwoo would be at risk too. And had been Donghyuk approached too then? Was that why he hadn't returned north in his usual schedule?

In short, they were all reasonably worried. They’d had now four weird and scarily similar deaths, Junmyeon had been approached twice by strange people, Chanyeol and Junhoe once, they still had no news of Donghyuk besides the call Junhoe saw in Kyungsoo’s phone, and now the only remaining crew member from the Emerald’s last trip insisted on speaking his creepy tale. 

Junhoe sighed and wrapped his arms around his knees, trying to relax his back from the tense discomfort all of it had brought back. He closed his eyes and tried to push the unnerving memories away, focusing on the calming and constant whisper of the ocean and the comforting warmth of the setting sun. And it was soothing, it felt nice, all of it, but the worry just wouldn’t really stop tugging at his spine. He refused to go to Yunhyeong’s still coiled up tense, the other would smell it on him and go off on a tirade. Not a chance. 

He made the extra effort of blanking his mind as much as he could, hyperfocusing on the tiny bits and quips of everything around him. He tuned in to the birds in the distance, the wind running through the gaps in the rocks, brushing over the coarse plants nested along the shore. He felt his own clothes shift minimally with the pull of the air, the heat of the falling sun on his face. He could hear in the distance the muffled noise of people and the boats, much closer a splash in the water, the wind moving plants, shifts on the sand, water moving around. The hairs in the back of his neck standing up, a chill running down his spine. More water moving, close. 

There was a humm, low and vibrant, melodic but eerie in a way that chilled his blood and kickstarted his heart into a race. 

Junhoe opened his eyes with a startle, gasping as if waking up from a nightmare. His heartbeat was quick and thumped in his chest with intent, and he felt cold sweat forming behind his neck. Almost immediately, something splashed, just behind the raised rocks at the very edge, water splatters jumped up... 

And then it was silent again.

He needed a second to understand what exactly had happened, then a few more to look around himself and make sure there was nothing on land with him. After that, he finally gathered some courage to move near the water, crouching and keeping an eye on the edge of his little nook where the ground crumbled into rocks that went down into the ocean. The one bigger rock that blocked the low sight on a side looked harmless enough, but Junhoe was just a bit on edge, and feared something would jump out from behind. He tried peeking around first, but couldn’t really see all the way to the other side, so after a few moments of arguing with himself, he finally slid over the rock and looked what was there.

Nothing, of course. Just moss and water and more rocks below; the humid walls that rose further along to the sides, some floating pieces of plants. Nothing else.

He took a moment to look down and around, to make sure he was alone, there was no one creeping up on him. Probably a fish, a big one, splashing too close to the rocks. Probably that, yeah. He breathed out slowly, trying to settle his pulse, holding his weight on the big stone.

The rock itself was wide, flat on top, and warm from the rays of the setting sun. Junhoe splayed his fingers, pressing his palms, leaning over it slightly. He could rest his whole torso over it, soak up some extra warmth right over the water, feeling the sounds just below him. If he pushed a bit further, if he let his arm hang on the other side, his fingers would dip, his whole hand, touch the ocean. Oh what a nap he could take, taking all the best of everything, the warmth, the calming sounds, the peace and quiet, the cool, gentle water-

Something splashed loudly, and he realised he had closed his eyes again. He opened them to water on his face and a big fat seagull scrambling its way away from the rocks. He jumped away, almost getting a palmed kick on the face and falling on his ass for the second time.

Well, maybe it was time to go back after all.

\--

He wouldn’t say he was surprised, really. He supposed it was bound to happen, just maybe hadn’t expected it to be so soon and so ordinary. But there he was, shoulders slightly up and eyes curved almost shut over a little smile. A colorful windbreaker on and his dark, short hair peeking out from a electric blue baseball cap. And Yunhyeong, well, he was all over it. Half sitting on the empty table and leaning on it, smile big and stupid. You could almost see the hearts in his eyes, jesus, Junhoe was really fucking blind.

“Oh, June! Finally, I was about to send the police after you”

“Would you seriously calm down, Yun?” he huffed in annoyance, approaching with some hesitation, unsure if they were going to have dinner all together or maybe just later?

“Well, I would if you’d pay attention to your phone”

He finally came to stand before them, and nodded a greeting to the guy sitting “Hey, Donghyuk, good to see you”

“Yeah, same” the other answered, voice soft and mellow, but eyes now open and right on Junhoe’s face “Heard you went looking for me down south”

“Ah yeah” Yunhyeong chuckled, clearly uncomfortable “No it was just… We, well, we kinda wanted to visit and then they said it had been a while since- I mean, it’s not like- like any of us keep track or… Just, just-”

“Yeah” Junhoe interrupted “Yun was a little worried because he hadn’t seen you in a while and…” then he trailed off, realising he would have to explain the whole suspicious thingy going on and just exposing Yunhyeong’s crush outright was not an option as it had been with the southern mechanics. Donghyuk’s eyes were pinned on him, though, had been the whole time, and in all honesty it was kinda unsettling. The guy had sharp eyes, soft on his smiles but kind of hard otherwise. And he wasn’t really smiling anymore. 

Thankfully for both Junhoe and Yunhyeong, that was when Chanwoo rushed into the shop, giggling and stuttering high pitched nonsense about this new record he had broken in some game. He stopped when he noticed their guest.

“Oh, hi! Hi, hey” he rushed, quickly looking at Yunhyeong and back to Donghyuk “How-how is it going, eh?”

Some extra seconds of silence went by and Chanwoo cleared his throat. Junhoe looked back at the guy sitting and found him, really unsettlingly, _ still _staring at him. Before he could blurt a question, though, the smile was back, eyes soft and curved towards the youngest of them and voice gentle again “Fine, thank you”

“Well,” Yunhyeong clapped his hands softly, surely trying to both stirr away from the previous subject and refloat the conversation “We were going to have some dinner together, do you want to join us?”

“Ah, thank you Yun, but I really must be going now” Donghyuk said, the image of absolute politeness “I’ll be seeing you soon, though”

“Oh, sure, yeah” his friend accepted, unable to hide the disappointment in his voice. He wasn’t sure if Donghyuk had noticed, but Junhoe, and he was pretty sure Chanwoo too, had “Hope to see you around, then”

“Of course. See you too guys” he stood up, turning to the rest, smiling to Chanwoo and then to Junhoe. He could swear his eyes had opened up a bit when he did, growing more observant than just polite. Just a second, and then he was back to his smiles as he waved at them and walked away.

The moment the door shut close after him, Yunhyeong sighed loudly “Oh well, come on you two, help me cook”

They both followed amidst half hearted protests, but soon enough were efficiently working like a production line in a fabric. Practice (and Yunhyeong) had them well trained. They cooked (Yunhyeong did, mostly, Junhoe and Chanwoo pealed, chopped, washed and so) in their secluded kitchen area, as they usually did when the shop was still open so not to bother Yunhyeong’s parents while they worked, and then took their plates, bowls and glasses to the table at the very back, right beside the kitchen’s doors. The table was usually occupied with extra menus and condiment bottles and shakers, so no one really ever sat there beside them.

Junhoe was following along their routine almost absentmindedly (nearly cutting himself twice in the process), so he almost didn’t notice when Chanwoo jumped from his seat while they set the table, to go back into the kitchen because he had forgotten his phone inside. 

“You ok there June?” Yunhyeong asked him, evidently picking up on his drifting attention.

“Yeah, sure” he nodded, pondering about asking what was on his mind or not. He supposed he wasn’t losing anything “Was Donghyuk ok?”

“Huh? Why do you ask? Yeah, he seemed just fine” his friend shrugged.

Sure, it wasn’t him or Chanwoo who got the weird contemplative look.

“Well, did you say anything about me to him then?”

“Not really, we just talked about the whole weird stalker thing because I was worried and he asked me about it. He seemed alarmed himself so I told him you were just looking for a new place to rest by the ocean as you liked to do” 

“Oh…”

“Why the question?”

“No, it’s just, he looked weirdly at me”

“Oh, he was probably just worried. I told you, he looked concerned when I told him what had happened. And rightfully so, I mean, it could also happen to him at this point” he added, his very own concern coming afloat in his expression “Seriously, I think Junmyeon contacted the police about these weird things, but I wonder if they’ll do something”

Just then Chanwoo came back, still talking with someone from inside “Yeah, sorry, I’ll be more careful” he was chuckling in embarrassment. When he sat down and placed his phone on the table, still snickering and with some receding blush, he commented “It had fallen in the cabbage”

\--

He woke up. Simple as that; no startle, no nightmare, no weird sounds. He just woke up in the middle of the night, silence and darkness around him. All light was the moonlight coming in from the window, and all sounds were the wind and some lonesome owl in the distance. Maybe the brush and rustle of the tree branches beside his window. 

The covers were still snug around him, his cat sleeping at the foot of his bed, his phone dark and quiet. Why was he even awake? It wasn’t hard for him to sleep at night, but when he woke up like this in the middle of the night, completely alert, going back to sleep was hard.

He turned around, grunting in protest and kicking at the weight that was the fat calico near his feet (she just rolled and slept on), then sat up. The window was right beside him, just a meter away or so, the block of pale light stretched over the floorboards, up to his bed. He could see a few treetops from his place, he was just at a second floor in the building. One on the edge of the city, from where you could see the ocean in the distance, just not as much the shore. 

The branches shifted in the gentle wind, murmuring very softly, Junhoe noticed the sky had some clusters of clouds, the deep black and speckles of silver looming behind. He stood up almost wondering if his window was open. He wasn’t cold, he didn’t feel wind, but he could hear the trees swaying, such a subtle sound. Like… Oh, no, it wasn’t the trees at all. It didn’t sound of leaves and creaking wood in the wind. It was fluid and deep, it was water humming. It was the ocean, far in the distance, so much further away than the few treetops by his window.

He walked closer, bare feet getting cold on the floor, and peered through the window. He puffed some fog on the cold glass, eyes still adjusting to see. He couldn’t really make much of the ground, the trees obscured some of his view and the darkness of the night did some more. The light at the back of the building was motion sensitive, so it was off. It was all shadows shifting in between the nooks of leaves.

But the sound didn’t come from below, anyway. It sounded far away, from the very ocean, and then so close, like from his head. Sloshes and whispers so gentle and comforting, and then a hum, the same hum. The sound that went deeper than the water, melodic and eerie, thoughtful and anheling. Tired, melancholic. Junhoe felt himself shiver, then whiter a little. He didn’t like the sound, it was equal parts uncanny and sad. He couldn’t pinpoint its nature, a voice? An animal? The wind? None of those made sense, but there it was again, low and subtle just under the water, crawling up his spine and clenching on his heart with sad longing.

Something brushed his ankles and he startled with a gasp. He looked down in alarm, only to find his Mimo rubbing against his leg, tail up and eyes still sleepy. She meowed up at him, probably demanding for him to come back to bed. He had a hand on his racing heart as he sighed out the confused fright, then he bent down to pick the cat up, throwing one last look out the window into the still night. 

There was nothing. It was silent again. But he went back to sleep with his heart heavy with a foreign longing that was not his, could not be. He was half sure he had stolen it, maybe directly from the ocean.

247

_ Like the clouds dressing up your velvet skin _

_ Freckled in silvers and diamonds of deep _

He sighed in frustration, this wasn’t it. Something just wasn’t doing it right in there. He tapped his pen on the paper, pursuing his mouth to a side in thought. What was it? What was making it all fall so flat? Where had his burst of inspiration come from if this is what it amounted to?

He clicked his tongue, huffing in slight irritation when he heard the door open. Yeah, it was his job but at this rate he would never get this one to work. Might as well just give up for the day and get to organize the rest of the new arrivals once and for all. It’s not like he’d get much done anyway, it was fifteen minutes to the end of his shift, but might as well chip some of the pile off. Or he could clean up the counter, actually, it was a pretty mess of papers, receipts, coffee cups and dry pens. He had to throw those away so he wouldn’t be stuck trying to use them when he got to write down shit from a phone call. Always the same crap.

“Oh hey” a voice greeted him, pulling his attention from the assortment of pens on the counter. He recognized the friendly voice before looking, but there was Donghyuk with a little smile on his face, walking up to him in his bright blue baseball cap and yellow windbreaker “June, I didn’t know you worked here”

“Yeah, hey, didn’t think I’d see you again so soon” he straightened up, clumsily trying to tidy up the counter “Uh, you still in town, eh?” obviously, yeah.

“Yes, I still have some things to do” he answered. Rather curtly, Junhoe would’ve said if not for the still present smile on his face. He then regained his friendly tone and shot quickly “Say, I’m not sure I have enough time, what time does this store close?”

“A-at 7” Junhoe tripped a little on his tongue, a bit caught off guard.

“Oh well, you have a long while still”

“What do you mean?”

“Your shift here, don’t you stay until it closes?”

“Oh, no, I’m about to take my leave actually”

“Oh really? Lucky you still have some sun to catch at the shore, huh?”

Junhoe blinked quickly a few times, unsure of the direction of their conversation. Donghyuk was keeping his sharp, smiling eyes pinned on Junhoe’s, his whole demeanor bubbling with a engaging, eager intensity that made it strangely hard for him to look away.

“Uh, yeah, I suppose-”

The door opened again, this time swift with familiarity. 

“Hey, June!” greeted the owner of the store as he walked in “Oh, hey Donghyuk” he smiled to the visitor. He approached them both and dropped his bag on the counter, ignoring the remaining mess from Junhoe’s shift “I thought you were back home already”

“Ah, no, I decided to stay one more day” the other answered, smile intact.

“June, you ready to go?”

“Ah, I was… Uh, tidying up a little-”

“Don’t worry, it’s not like I’m not used to clean up after your mess, at least there are no coffee spills today”

He could only sputter in embarrassment at that and the way Donghyuk snickered along.

“Go along now, I know you need your daily fix of lizarding at the shore and it looks like rain is coming soon”

At this very simple, offhanded statement, Junhoe immediately looked outside the wide windows of the front. It didn’t really look that unstable, but there were some suspicious clouds floating rather low in the distance, one tone too dark to ignore. Was this going to be another freak storm? 

He turned back to as the owner, Sungwoon, about it and then noticed that the man was already walking towards the back, while Donghyuk seemed contemplating something as he looked out the front of the store.

“Go June” the owner insisted as he opened the back room door to drop his things “sun’s gonna hide soon”

“Right, ok” he started picking his things up and into his backpack, leaving the computer in order and the receipts at least tidy before walking around the counter and to the door “Thank you, see you tomorrow!” he called over his shoulder, getting a wave and a greeting back.

He only noticed when he was out that Donghyuk had walked out just before him, and was now looking up into the sky, expresion closed. He followed his gaze but didn’t see any changes from a minute before. He debated between saying something or just leaving, wasn’t really sure how to navigate the ambiguous exchanges they had. The guy’s face was strange and concerned, and Junhoe couldn’t stop thinking of all the weird happenings of the previous weeks. What if Donghyuk was actually aware of the link between the freak storms and bodies washing ashore? What if he had connected the weird stalkers with them? Or what if he hadn’t at all and walked unaware through it? Junhoe felt the need to warn him, even when he wasn’t even sure it would make any sense if he tried to explain himself. He remembered what Yunhyeong had told him the night before, so maybe Donghyuk had been drawing the same strange conclusions as them?

Unable to make up his mind, and having no clue how to explain any of it to the other guy, he hoped that he was right in assuming Donghyuk was actually thinking along the same lines as him regarding this storm and would be cautious enough to book it before the night or the storm, whichever came first.

“Uh, see you around, I guess” he offered, hoping it was the right call.

Donghyuk didn’t seem to have heard him for a moment, attention still stuck over their heads, but before Junhoe could feel properly offended, he blinked slowly and away from the clouds and looked at him in the eyes, face way more somber than he would have expected.

“Yeah” he said dryly “See ya” without blinking his dark eyes away, expresion serious, he turned and walked away.

\--

His notebook was lying beside him over the cold sand, discarded after one minute too many trying to figure out what the hell was not working with his stupid poem. Now Junhoe was leaning back against a flat-ish patch of stone on the packed earth that climbed up the mounds. The sun was already crawling down and running from the approaching mass of clouds, but he was trying to get the last bits of sun rays he could before he had to book it back to his appartment. Yes, it seemed that the weather was getting antsy but not as quickly as the last time. 

He had his phone on his hands, had been texting Chanwoo for a while, then watching cooking tutorials he would never try (maybe ask Yunhyeong to), and now he was simply checking on his feed for something interesting. But the truth was he was actually getting sleepy under the lukewarm light, with the calming sounds and the leveling pull of the ocean. He wasn’t even cold. He cursed the incoming storm for cutting this beauty short.

He had switched to instagram now, delving into the comment section of a random celebrity post, then back out and to the stories. Out again to youtube, out again to the cursed bird app, his finger slipped and hit fave on a promoted post. His eyes blinked slowly as he fixed that and exited the app before he could do something worse, and dropped the phone over his closed notebook.

Resting his head back on the stony low wall, he moved his eyes over the smooth plain of deep blue water just past the flat stone at the edge of his little corner. The sun had already left its spil of colour down the sky, trailing behind like warm ripples from the melting gold to the firsts hues of the ocean replicated high up above. The first dots of stars, the bold ones invading the daytime, were already breaking through, but would soon be swallowed by the storm. 

He heard more than he felt his phone vibrate, but he was just too lazy and warm to move any of his limbs from its place. Just some minutes more, until the sun stopped heating up his face, just until his clothes started losing the warmth and smell of the beach. Just a moment and he’d check his phone. Just until the moment the reddening light of the sun was no longer visible behind his eyelids and he couldn’t feel the sun rays on his neck anymore. 

Wait, had he closed his eyes? Oh, but it was just so pleasant.

The water rolled and roared softly, only a whisper of power. There was no wind to join, it was all the ocean on the rocks, coming and going and spraying the birds far away. How could anyone not succumb to this? To the rustles and whispers and gentle nothings murmured from the very deeps to the surface. It was like putting a seashell on your ear, hearing the cavernous echoes ripple so seamlessly, so soothingly. Like Mimo’s purring, the ocean was purring too, right by his ears, pulling and pushing and making him sway along the current in the gentlest way, splashing over wet stone and moss, spraying sand and soil. Droplets as tiny and delicate as the very tiny dots in the sky. Cold and soft on his face.

_ The mist of mornings and nights, the embrace of the tide, the welcome of the bright sun above, the chilling air, breaking the water to see the sky, bright and vibrant. The sounds exploding and bouncing along the waves that crashed further in, on the shore. It was warm and vivid and… Just there, he could hear the voices and the ships, feel the vibrations echo in the water, hear them crisp and sharp above. Thrilling, maddening. Dangerous. _

_ The one song that invaded him, the one tide that overpowered him, the one sound that ringed over his water. Feeling the warm setting sun, the molding sand, something vibrated. He felt the enveloping warmth, it was like the water but not. _

So warm, like the setting sun, but not. 

Tiny droplets spraying on his face, _ cool air suddenly on his cheeks, _ as if the ocean were just under his nose, _ or his face breaking the surface into the sky, _ the heat of the setting sun cooling, _ and the soothing touch of the water giving way to the sun. _

_ A humming sound, deep and curious, _ almost confused and distraught. Air on his face, _ warm air. _

Junhoe felt something snap, all the hairs standing up, goosebumps explode on his skin and his heart kick wildly up to his neck. He opened his eyes when he heard a gasp, so near him it pulled one of his own from his chest. Water splashed, not droplets but a whole bucket load right up his face.

He pushed up and his hands slipped, chest falling on stone. He blinked and rubbed the water from his eyes and looked around, to the surface just below, still disturbed, the trail moving away into waters darker than he remembered, than he expected. It was spotted in silvers over velvets, a reflection of the night sky. He watched the glimmers and flashes, mind running to catch up. 

It was night time, it wasn’t but now it was. He was leaning over the flat rock at the edge, looming over the water, face dripping, heart racing. His head was mushed and cottoned with sloshing water and echoing caverns, his skin confused with warmth and cold, dry and damp. His eyes were flashing in colors and silvers. He wasn’t sure what he saw anymore.

The ocean and the sky were both shining black and white, silver in their depths. But it was not silver what Junhoe had seen, flashing barely a distance away just after snapping back from his confusing sleep. 

In the dark ocean, under the dark sky, among the silvers dotting up and shimmering down, a flash of glimmering, fiery red went lost in the water in the blink of an eye.

\--

The storm caught up to him, as he had expected. It hadn’t been the idea, but it hadn’t been the idea to fall asleep at the beach either. Not falling asleep in the sun nor waking up to darkness and rumbling thunders at his heels. And definitely not falling asleep on the sand to wake up by the rocks. Whatever that had been, however that had happened, that nap had not been in his plans. And that was the sole reason he was now huddling under an awning over a store at the very corner of a street, surrounded by curtains of water and hugging himself in cold. 

He was timing his sprints from cover to cover with no particular method and just to give himself a breather in between showers, but this last one had left him soaked wet and now that the wind had picked up he was positively freezing. He could feel and hear his teeth chattering and had been jumping in place for the last few minutes to shake some of the cold (and water). The next milestone should probably be the balcony across the street, and then he could sprint to the bus stop near the crossing. He could also take a turn instead and aim for the taxi stop across the pub. Both options would take him home, but the bus was way cheaper and he had no idea if he had enough cash on him that wasn’t soaked. And no, his little port city had no fancy card-accepting cabs yet, in case you wondered. 

So the balcony would be.

After another five minutes or so he accepted that the rain wouldn’t stop any time soon and he had to make his run before he missed the bus, as much as he didn’t want to face the cold water again. He hugged his backpack close to his chest, getting mentally ready to leave his little shelter. He peaked to the sides of the street, the bus was not in sight, couldn’t hear it either. It was all rain and some voices from the street behind, probably the pub.

“Come on Koo June, stop stalling” he scolded himself through chattering teeth “Any moment now the bus’s gonna come and-”

He jumped a little in startle when a loud voice garbled something from the other street. It didn’t sound very sober but neither did it sound angry. Just, jesus, loud.

He clicked his tongue at the drunkard in half hearted reproach when he heard him still talking loudly and approaching. He really should hurry, he didn’t want to be near this dude. He took a long breath and checked the streets one last time to avoid any surprise cars, then took off from under the awning. Two steps under the rain, though, he stopped. He hesitated under the water, just two seconds, mere steps from the street, brow furrowed in concentration and slight confusion. The drunk guy was close, around the corner probably but there was a second voice with him. 

Junhoe hurried back under the awning, curious, just wanting to make sure-

“You have to believe me, it’s right at the south beach, the storm must have brought it up!” the second voice was saying, insistent and uncharacteristically loud. 

Junhoe stepped closer to the corner, not daring to come out just yet, but he was almost sure it was him.

“You kid” the man drawled, much lower now but still within earshot from Junhoe “You talking nonsense, it wasn’ real! Y’all bunch of shits sai’ so all this while, righ’? huh?”

“No, I never doubted you guys, you know I believed you!”

Yes, it was him. As strange as this all was, this had to be Donghyuk.

“I…You don’” the guy sounded hesitant “Are you… You honest?” he asked.

“Yes! Listen how would I know otherwise? I told you, that’s what you saw, right?”

“I… Y-yeah, it was…” the man’s voice sounded more grounded, as if suddenly starting to share Donghyuk excitement “Are you sure you found this?”

“Yes! Big, dark and shiny, it’s as big as a dolphin” the younger man was saying, voice shaking with some emotion “I’m telling you it’s down there, you _ have _ to come with me”

Junhoe felt a shiver go down his spine and it had little to do with the cold by now. 

“I… I can’t believe...” the man faltered “They said I should forget about it, they said it would get me killed” he said, and something in him sounded almost uncanny and unhinged. Something was off with the dude and his words made little to change that “They said I’d end up dead, that all of us would!”

“What? Who-?” Donghyuk started asking, but the man continued.

“Just you wait until I show them, just you wait until we get this in their faces, huh?”

This didn’t sound right, and Junhoe was now feeling all kinds foreboding running over him. Donghyuk didn’t know of the drowned men? Wasn’t he aware of the crew being dead? And now he was getting himself directly involved with the last of them, who, in addition, sounded kind of off his rocker right there. 

“Where? Where is it kid, come on, show me!” the man said, sounding fully changed into an enthusiasm almost off putting “Come on!”

“Y-yeah… It’s…” the younger guy now didn’t sound as sure, and Junhoe sure couldn’t let this continue, could he? Oh shit he really shouldn’t but- "It’s down at the edge of the bay, south, it’s not far from here, I can show you”

In the end he didn’t really have to gather much courage to jump in heroically or anything, because the two men walked straight into him when rounding the corner of the store.

“Uh-” he started loudly, having clearly no idea what to say but impulsively trying to catch their attention.

He was right after all. Donghyuk was there, baseball cap under the hood of his yellow windbreaker, but still soaking wet, and the drunk dude right behind him looking a little out of it. The younger seemed totally taken aback by Junhoe’s presence, eyes wider than he had ever seen them to the point he almost laughed at his expression. 

Well, he had their attention, now was the time for his brain to start functioning and give him something to work with. Before that could happen, Donghyuk himself blurted a loud “What are you doing here?”

“I was… I was going back home and the rain caught me” he said, eyeing the drunk sailor warily. The man seemed somehow confused, looking between the two of them. He really had to do something about the whole situation before it ended bad “Listen, Donghyuk, man, I… I don’t think-”

Something in Donghyuk snapped then, as if he were realising something suddenly “No, shut up!” he said, one hand out to Junhoe’s face “You shut up, what-? Fucks sake, what the hell are you even-?”

“Who you kid?” the drunk man asked Junhoe, and then Donghyuk spit a sharp, full _ Fuck! _ surprising both of them.

“No, he’s- It doesn’t matter, I don’t know, look-” Donghyuk said quickly, turning fully to the sailor and partially blocking Junhoe from his view “Just don’t mind him, whatever, you said you were coming with me, yeah?” 

“Uh, Donghyuk-”

“You gonna come or not? I swear, you gotta come before the water comes up again”

It went without saying that Junhoe was kind of confused by all this, the sailor was eyeing him in suspicion and Donghyuk was ignoring him and he wasn’t sure how to stop them from going… Wherever. Was he doing the right thing? He suddenly wasn’t sure but the bad chills were still going rampant and the almost vacant eyes in the sailor, paired with a sudden flash of thunder and Donghyuk’s growingly frantic voice were just too many bad things to ignore. 

“Dude, stop! You don’t know what happened with the rest of the crew?” he said loudly to Donghyuk’s back. 

A heavy silence fell over the three of them, the sailor was eerily still, and Donghyuk had fallen quiet. 

“They’re dead, man!” he insisted “All drowned in days exactly like this one, and everyone involved got these weird ass stalkers creeping up on them” None of the two seemed to react to his words, but the tension had grown to be so thick he could probably taste it in the back of his throat if he breathed deep enough “Look, just stay outta this dude’s hair, alright? Stay outta the whole deal, man, something’s fucked up”

For a moment he feared the sailor was going to lash at him, the sudden movement from the guy made him back up instinctively. But it had been nothing more than a twitch, a full bodied spasm and then a few blinks as he looked around. He eyed him again and then Donghyuk, seemed to be as tragically drunk as he had sounded at first.

“Hey, what you want brats?” the man asked “Huh, I don’t think I know you” he said to Junhoe, then turned, clicking his tongue and wobbling on his legs “Fuckin’ kids” and slowly walked away, probably back towards the pub. 

Suddenly Donghyuk bent over, hands on his knees and voice mumbling under his breath intelligibly. He was shaking his head and gripping the fabric of his pants tightly, then straightening up again just to throw his hands up to his head, pulling his hood at cap all out in the same movement. 

“Fuck’s sake” he was saying, voice high in some sort of distress “He was… That was… Motherfucking…” then, to Junhoe’s utter bafflement, he threw the cap in his hand to the wet ground with a loud and nonsensical yell that stretched under the white noise of the rain.

That alone had been plenty strange, but stranger yet was Donghyuk sudden turn, his eyes sharp and dark and ablaze with an anger so evident Junhoe felt his stomach recoil in alarm over his absolute confusion.

“What-”

“You-” Donghyuk’s voice was so tight it could barely be heard over the rain, before it went up in volume “You asshole!” he yelled, then went up in Junhoe’s face, hands going to his collar and pushing him up against the wall behind with such speed and strength he felt his air knocked out of him before understanding why “You fucking idiot!”

It took him a second to push the guy away, but some more to catch up to the situation. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” he spat, body now coiled in anger.

“Me? You dumbfuck! Why the hell did you meddle?” he turned in a circle, as if completely disoriented “He was the last one, I had to show them, they have to _ see _and he was the fucking last one! You-” a frustrated growl followed as Donghyuk just covered his face with his hands.

“I just tried to help you not get involved-”

“Shut up, shut the fuck up!” the scream was muffled behind his hands, posture shrinking, voice cracking “You don’t fucking get it, so just shut up”

For a moment he was unable to reply, overrun by anger and puzzlement and trying to grasp at the words bouncing around his head, from questions to insults and all inbetween. He just couldn’t understand what in hell was wrong with the guy now, but he was sure this was not the conversation he expected to be having two minutes ago.

He forced himself to breathe deeply and not just let the anger win this one out, as hard as it was, in sight that Donghyuk seemed to be leaning more on an emotional breakdown than an aggressive outbreak. He could see his shoulders shaking and he was not moving his hands from his face.

Maybe he could try and bridge whatever confusion was going on? Maybe he should try and talk calmly before things got messy again. He was still agitated by the unpleasant surprise but at least the urge to hit the guy was fading. It was either he tried to get an explanation or he left, couldn’t really do anything else, wouldn’t bode well for either of the two and he never really wanted to be in a situation like this with Donghyuk. Why were they even like this? Donghyuk was a cool guy, what was wrong? And shit what if Yunhyeong got word of this? Fuck, well this really sucked and he really couldn’t understand why it had happened at all. Alright, talk, that was it, he needed to sort things out before Donghyuk went back south for an undetermined amount of time with things messed up and-

“Listen,” Donghyuk said then, voice unstable. He had uncovered his face but wouldn’t look at Junhoe yet “whatever this was, forget it. This was all messed up, shouldn’t have happened, it’s done, it’s over-” he huffed sharply, sniffling and looking up. Junhoe could put his money now that the guy was about to cry and he was more confused than ever.

“What-?”

“Forget about it, ok?” he repeated turning to him, a bit more intense and with a shaking voice. His eyes were a bit reddened, this evident even in the poor light of the street posts under the rain. He sniffed again, looking to a side, his voice growing raw “You don’t get it and you won’t get it because this isn’t your business at all. So just _ forget it _”

With this, he pulled his hood back up and stormed off into the rain, leaving Junhoe looking at his quickly retreating back and still trying to make some sense of the whole situation and his own feelings about it.

257

“So what happened with Donghyuk yesterday?” 

Junhoe was frozen, traveler cup filled with coffee in his hand and eyes straight ahead fixed on the pedestrian red light.

“What? Why?”

Yunhyeong side eyed him reproachfully, but with much more less intensity he’d expect if he truly knew what had happened. So he was probably asking because he really didn’t know. Well, good.

“Come on, something happened”

“I-Why are you asking? Why do you think something happened?” he tried to laugh it off, but the forced chuckle got stuck somewhere on its way out and made him cough. 

The little light man turned white and they started crossing the street.

“I got a message this morning from him, like super early” his friend said offhandedly, taking his phone out from his pocket and looking for something. They stopped after crossing, moving near the window of a store so not to block the path, and then Yunhyeong showed him his phone “Here”

A chat was open, the first message showing from 5:24am.

**Donghyuk**

Hey, sorry to bother you at this hour, just wanted to ask you a favor bc I don’t have his number and I’m leaving in 5

Can you please please tell your friend Junhoe that I’m rlly sorry for last night and that it was all a misunderstanding? He’ll know but it was really all so stupid and I really feel like crap for it, it was ugly and I was stupid and it’d be better if we could forget abt it

I know you won’t ask if I tell you not to, so I’m sorry about that too

Just know it was all a stupid confusion at a very bad time

Thank you and see you next trip

Take care! :)

He returned the phone to his friend with a whole new assortment of feelings itching under his skin. For starters he was glad Donghyuk had stepped forward first and apologized, but then it was through a text to Yunhyeong and he was pretty much just wanting to be done as quick as possible. And also, well, he was still very much confused to hell and back about it and apparently he would not be getting any answers in the future.

“Well?”

Yunhyeong was looking understandably concerned, and Junhoe really didn’t like that look on him (his eyes kinda got weird and rounder and he started pouting like a fish), so he shrugged and tried his best nonchalant tone.

“Nothing, we both got caught up in the storm and I saw him and, uh, went to say hi and ask him what he was doing but I guess it _ was _ a bad moment and I scared him and well,” another shrug, his mind was working double time to build up the story as plausible as possible under the heavy worried mother hen look from Yunhyeong “he kinda sent me to hell and there was some pushing and I got mad and he got also mad and we just, you know… It got awkward, and we left… Because… It was still raining and, yeah” 

He focused on his coffee for a moment, feeling his friend’s eyes on his profile.

“I… I don’t know what to say, honestly” Yunhyeong finally admitted, sounding more mistified than upset “Well, I hope this settles that, then?”

“Yeah, yeah, it does. It was stupid, like he said”

They resumed their walk, and after two blocks Junhoe parted to walk to the bookstore while Yunhyeong continued his way to the market.

He walked through the door and greeted the owner absentmindedly, walking to the counter and dropping his backpack on the chair. He set his travel mug on the counter and turned the computer on, eyes on the screen but not really seeing the setup run. His mind was still drifting to the previous night, trying to understand how the level of apparent anger and frustration in Donghyuk was now just _ a stupid confusion at a bad time _ . It was odd how the other insisted on forgetting it when something had visibly upset him so much. Why had he wanted to show this weird fish so bad to the drunk sailor? _ They need to see, he was the last one _ , he had said. Was it because it was his last chance to show one of them? But what would he get from it? And why did he act like he had lost the opportunity? He could go and talk to the guy again, right? Unless… Unless the storm had been one of _ those _. Maybe Donghyuk knew that?

He supposed the important thing was that he seemed to be ok that morning, no weird creepy thing happened to him during the storm. The sailor though, there were no news about that yet, and he was kind of anxious about it, because he had seen the guy. What if he was one of the last ones seeing him? What if he got called to testify or something? And what about the weird whale thingy? He hadn’t heard anything about that either, had no one found it? The south shores just past the bay were not as frequented, they were rocky and with sharp climbs, it could be just around where Junhoe had his little corners. Was the thing still there-?

“June!” the owner slapped his arm softly “Yo, come back to earth, kid”

“Sorry, what?”

“I asked you if you knew what was it that this Donghyuk kid was looking for yesterday?”

He blinked up from the computer screen to the owner “Huh?”

The owner blinked back at him, eyebrows up “What _ huh? _ He was here yesterday, no?”

“Yeah”

“Was he looking for something? He left so quickly, he looked to be in a hurry”

“Uh, I don’t know?”

“Wasn’t he talking to you?”

“Well, yeah but he never said what he came looking for”

“Oh, well pitty. I guess he can get if next time if he doesn’t find it back south” the man shrugged, dropping the keys in the drawer and giving Junhoe a pat on the back “All yours kid, remember to sort those new arrivals before the weekend”

“Sure, yeah, later”

The chime at the door tingled when the owner left, and Junhoe set to slowly go over the boxes behind the counter, half his mind trying to figure out what the hell had Donghyuk wanted the previous day. It was really strange, because he knew he had talked a bit with him and yet he could not remember what they had talked about at all. Damn his head was a proper clusterfuck sometimes, no wonder people kept complaining about his lack of attention.

He tried not to dwell on it much, he had had enough of Donghyuk and Donghyuk related headaches to last him a while, so he went about his day with as much normalcy as he could. He actually managed to declutter half the boxes through his shift and leave a more or less tidy counter to Sungwoon. 

He didn’t visit his little groove in the rocky side of the shore after work because he was roped into some gamer cafe with Chanwoo and then grocery shopping for himself. By the time he realised, it was nighttime and he was helping Chanyeol close up his workshop.

“What a day my dude!” the tall mechanic announced loudly, dropping a big, heavy hand on Junhoe’s shoulder.

“I guess”

“No?”

“What?”

“Not much of a day for you?”

“Oh no, it was… Ok? Nothing to write back home really” he shrugged one shoulder, checking his phone for the time. It was 7:47pm.

“Oh well, lucky you. I had to deal with two arrogant pricks,” he started counting with his fingers as they walked to his truck “one old lady set on me fixing his ancient unfixable cart, one mad pigeon inside the workshop, the crazy Emerald dude talking about shiny dolphins again, Kyungsoo ignoring my calls the whole afternoon and Junmyeon’s fit because I missed one of his ritual check up calls he does every two hours or so” he huffed, dropping his bag on the back of the truck and walking to the driver’s side “Come on up, dude, up!” he yelled from the door, seeing as Junhoe had stopped at the back.

“Wa- Wait, you said the crazy Emerald dude?” he asked, rushing to get in.

“Yeah, what about him?”

“He came here? When?”

Chanyeol looked at him funnily from the side, turning the truck’s ignition “Yeah, I just told ya pal, today”

“No, yeah but as in what time of the day?”

“Why is that relevant?” the other laughed, but answered anyway “Not long ago, ‘round five?”

“What was he saying?”

“Same old, man, same fucking old as the day he walked down that cursed ship” he drove into the streets, relaxing back into the seat and then adopting a weird voice Junhoe supposed was meant to imitate the sailor’s “Y’all don’t believe me I know, but I know what I saw. And look it now, we’re cursed, fucking cursed, that fucking beast cursed us all” he waved a hand in circles, voice back to normal “etc, ya know”

“Same old” Junhoe nodded, not really knowing what _ same old _ really was but aware that none of the previous night had been mentioned “Crazy guy”

  
  


_ 247 _

_ It was cold up, the air was still humid and clinging to the rain, wet and chilling in the dead of the night, the storm just having blown past, deep into the dark hours. The coulds were clearing and the light of the moon slowly reaching down. But he could still see. In between all the shadows and across the distance in between them he could still clearly see him, sitting alone on an outcrop, one of those stretching out past the beach, the ones doting their way into the water. Moss and cold were probably not comfortable for him, but there he was, waiting alone. Hoping in his loneliness that someone would come close, and he wanted to. He ached to reach out and talk to him, hold his hand, comfort him. It pained him to watch from a distance as his little brother suffered alone. _

_ His fingers twitched against the rotting pillar of the old, deep pier, the far lights of the sleeping city sank further in the raising mist of the stagnant hours between the dying night and the approaching morning, all floating in the silent air. And over the mellow sounds of the quiet night, the trees and the waves and the abdicant wind, as faint as it was, he could still hear the most painful sound he had ever heard in his life; the tiny sobs of his younger brother far in the distance, swallowed by the void around him. _

_ His hands spasmed, his back tensed, he wanted to go, he wanted so badly to go to him, even though he knew- _

_ “No” a gentle voice told him, just after a warm, little hand rested on his shoulder “You know you can’t” _

_ It didn't really startle him, he'd felt this presence near him for a while, and he was glad it was Jinhwan and not Jiwon, because he was not sure he could bear his other cousin's intensity at the moment. He'd break. _

_ Even now he couldn’t speak back, he just swallowed tightly and blinked his own withheld remorse filled tears away from his eyes. It was not fair, there was his little brother blaming himself and crying alone in misplaced guilt, hoping for a word of relief before his departure. And here he was, stuck, bounded and unable to comfort him as he should. As he well should. _

_ He should and he shouldn’t, his place as a brother and his place in his clan. One was weighing more than the other, even though he knew that to him they held value the other way around. He was out of touch with it all, askew with himself, confused and lost and hurting and longing in all his sides, inside and out, on his skin and in his heart. More voices and calls clashing in him. _

_ All was confusing, these times all was so difficult and frustrating. So many sounds and songs calling to him, some threatening and ominous, some hurt and vulnerable, and some… Some foreign and enthralling. Ah, but that one, that one no one should know of. _

_ “I know” he whispered to his older cousin, looking beside him into his troubled eyes, behind the lonesome flash of pale green shining with silver in the moonlight. _

_ He was given a sad nod “Come on, you hurt doing this, he’ll be fine. He’ll be back to his safety soon enough. Let’s just go” _

_ He nodded in return, taking the truth in the words and the kind sentiment behind his cousin’s pull, the comfort his small frame offered when gathering him in his arms for just a second. He didn't want to concern him, them, anymore. As much as they'd fought, both his cousins had been by him through all this endeavour, risking themselves just to look after him. He had to let them be at ease, keep them away from his reckless decisions. _

_ So he’d go, he’d abide to this prohibition for now, bear this one last denial. But only this one, this last one until he would no more, he’d take prohibitions no more. He was not allowed to go to his younger brother anymore and it killed him inside. He was not going to let them forbid him from anything else. He’d take his treasures close to his chest and hold them safe in his shadows. Starting then, with his new song. This new, thrilling, strange call from the sun at the shore. This one song was his and his own, it would be his secret. His dark haired secret hidden at the corner in the rocks, the one with eyes of coal and skin shining golden under the setting sun. _

  
  
  



	3. III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um, so my laptop is in repairs and won't be coming back for a while, therefore I'm updating from my phone. It's really uncomfortable and weird, I hope I didn't mess anything up! If anythings goes weird in the format, I blame my phone.
> 
> Alright so, finally finished this chap, had it 3/4 done for a long while and now finally got around to getting it more or less decent. I hope it helps pass some time! 
> 
> As a side note; in these crazy times, please be careful. Stay home if you can, be mindful and take all precautions advised. Remember that protecting each other is the only way to minimize the inevitable damage. Stay calm, take care of yourself and those around you, all the best for you all ❤
> 
> Now, on to the chapter.

307

The moon was bright and clear, a silver thread embroidered in dark velvet. There were no clouds, the stars not blinded by the modest city lights were bare and sparkling high.

And Junhoe was not entirely sure why he was contemplating this. He had been in his bed, watching a series’ episode on his phone and then at some point fell asleep. But now here he was, standing by his window, staring up into the night and far into the distance, eyes almost pinned to the imperceptible line where the ocean met the sky. There was his whole attention when he blinked and realised… That he was awake. And out of his bed. Standing.

His foggy mind went back to the impromptu nap nearly a week ago at the beach, falling asleep under the setting sun sitting on the soft sand, and waking up in the dark under the looming storm, lying on the wet rocks. What was all that about? Was he sleepwalking? Since when? No one ever mentioned anything to him, and he was dead sure his friends would have taken the chance to poke some fun out of him if they could.

A sleepy meow called his attention back to his bed, where a very comfy looking Mimo asked him to come back and be her human furnace. And Junhoe couldn’t say no to that so, with a last inquiring look at the sleeping city through his window, he got himself back into bed.

It was hard to sleep though, with his brain now alert but still confused, giving him the misleading sensation of a presence near him, like eyes fixed on his back. It was unnerving.

He ended up getting up again, checking the window, turning all lights on and checking his tiny apartment with his groggy cali in tow; the doors, all windows, even through the peephole on his front door. There was no one, Mimo was not reacting at all, just following him with increasing annoyance all over the place. By the time he went back to his room his brain was finally understanding this and proclaiming all to be sleepy confusion.

Once back to bed, Mimo slowly walking her circles to settle at his legs, he took a moment to repeat in his head that there was nothing and no one around, before turning the bedside lamp off and dropping his phone by his pillow. It was now 3:46am, and he cursed out loud at this. It was wednesday already and he had the morning shift, he really hoped his alarm would wake him up. He was still unsettled after the whole round, sleepiness long gone.

And yet, ten minutes later found him completely out, soothed to sleep by a sound that he would not remember hearing at all; the same that woke him up and pulled him by the window now cottoned his thoughts with a yearning white noise and gentle warmth. A low, longing sound, an imperceptible voice coming from far away and echoing within himself, like in the inside of a seashell on the sand. 

018

“It’s just some minutes down that way” he pointed south, finger towards the narrow path opening between the piling rocks that rolled down into the water and the patchy soil climbing up the high mounds that framed the beach on the side. 

It was a distance away from the wider beach and the cleaner sand where people actually went to walk or enjoy the water when warmer. Junhoe, on his part, usually roamed nearer this edge, where the rocks started dotting the ground and some wiry bushes and plants clung to random corners, it was more humid and less bright and picture pretty, but it was calmer and closer to slightly deeper waters, as the drop of the seabed was sharper. People usually didn’t like this, and that served him just perfect, that’s why this had been his favourite little spot for so long. His friends often complained it was damp and got cold and windy quickly, that the sun didn’t last and they couldn’t really get much in the water, that the rocks and shrubs were annoying and had bugs and moss, and the ground under water was tricky and dangerous, and even that when it got dark there were weird sounds from the rocky path to the south. Junhoe really didn’t care, mainly because it was all bullshit. The sun was enough, the cold and wind weren’t so bad, the water was accessible enough and he much preferred the soothing sound of the water crashing on stone that the noise of people. It was pretty and quiet and there was no such thing as spooky sounds at night. He’d been plenty a time after sunset in there and could give statement of that.

But, with all these usual complaints in mind, he really didn’t find it surprising when both his friends’ faces scrunched in displeasure when they saw where he was pointing.

“Oh, don’t tell me that’s gonna be our spot now. I’m not following you” Chanwoo whined.

At this Junhoe hesitated, furrowing his brow a little in mild confusion. 

“What do you mean _ our _ spot?” he asked, wondering how his friend had gotten to that conclusion. He was happy to share his time with them and bring them with him to the water to enjoy it together, but that little nook… Well, he hadn’t thought about it really, but it was _ his _place. His own. And it was kind of surprising to find out the sudden selfish feeling bubbling in him at the sole mention of someone invading it. 

“Don’t follow, I don’t want you to follow” he said honestly.

“Oh” Yunhyeong raised his eyebrows in surprise “You don’t?”

He doubted for a moment, worrying that he might have offended them or something, but guessed it was only curiosity. He had, after all, always insisted in having them accompany him to this very place, even when Chanwoo complained often. Maybe it was strange for him to now keep this one corner away from them. 

“No it’s just that, well, it is hard to get. The trail is weird and I actually found it because I slipped and kind of fell. And it’s small and full of rocks and the sand is even less smooth than here, it's basically dirt” he rambled, half conscious that he was pretty much pulling excuses “The other day I saw a big spider, I think it lives there, there’s a massive cobweb under this one bush at the back-”

“Ew, ok, ok, you can stop. It’s not like I wanted to go” Yunhyeong waved his hands, grimacing dramatically “Just found it odd, that’s all”

“But isn’t it creepy?” Chanwoo asked, lowering his voice for some odd reason “It’s near the old pier, isn’t it?”

Junhoe blinked in wonder “The old one? Is it?”

“Well, yeah? It down that way, if you say it’s some minutes walk, then it must be close?”

“I guess so? I didn’t see it” he shrugged.

“But you did go past the bay”

“Yeah, I just don’t know where the place even is. I just slipped and fell and it was nice so I stayed”

“And how are you going back if you don’t know where it is?” Chanwoo asked amused.

“I just walk until I see it? How’s that so weird?”

“Alright guys, stop the nonsense” Yunhyeong interrupted them, looking at his phone “June, Donghyuk is, for some bizarre reason,” he pulled his eyebrows up in a weird face “asking about you”

“Huh?”

“Don’t know, he’s asking _ how’s June, is all good? _” he read out loud.

Junhoe wondered about the sudden interest, thinking of the last time he had seen the guy, more than a week ago “Is it because of that other time?”

“Your guess is as good as mine” Yunhyeong shrugged.

“Well, just tell him it’s all good”

“Alright”

With that he went back to texting and Junhoe, not interested in bringing the subject of his new little place back, settled back on his hands and closed his eyes to the sun for a while. Two seconds in, though, Chanwoo’s voice broke the calm.

“Uh, excuse me? Am I the only one out of the loop here?” he sounded between amused and offended.

“What? The loop of what?” Junhoe asked, then realised that their younger friend had probably no idea of his situation with Donghyuk “Oh, that. It was just a little misunderstanding we had like a week ago. But it’s all cleared out, it was silly” he waved the issue away with a hand.

Chanwoo, on his part, kept his inquiring expresion insistent on his face.

“Huh” he flat toned “ok, good for you two then. And the rest?”

That had him drawing blanks “What rest?”

Chanwoo moved his attention to him for three full seconds and scoffed “Of course, Koo June doesn’t even realise”

“Chan, don’t be mean” Yunhyeong scolded softly, attention still on his phone.

If he was being mean Junhoe didn’t even realise about what, and was actually more interested in knowing what he had missed this time.

“Of course,” Chanwoo nodded, now starting to sport a smile “back to the important subject. Here June, I’ll explain…” he pointed to Yunhyeong with his hand “Since when do he and Donghyuk have each other’s numbers _ and _ talk on the regular?”

He heard Yunhyeong’s muttered curse but it still took him some dripping seconds to get the point. 

“Oh”

“Yeah, _ oh _” Chanwoo emphasized. 

“Can you not?” Yunhyeong asked, already sounding fed up.

Junhoe couldn’t help but to start laughing, piggy snort and all, ungracefully accepting of his oversight “I didn’t-” he wheezed, feeling his voice thinning in effort to speak over his laughter “I didn’t connect the dots” he pointed to Yunhyeong and his phone “Oh my god, I didn’t-” he clapped in amusement, not even sure what he was laughing about but evidently infecting both his friends, who started laughing along.

“You’re an idiot” Chanwoo snickered.

Junhoe couldn’t really deny it, he had learnt to take it as it was. He clutched his tummy as wiped a tear from his eyes “I am”

\-- 

He tried to walk back but tripped and stumbled until he hit the wall and smacked his hand to the handle of the door. He hissed and shook his hand while giving the stinky eye to Mimo, who strutted away with an offended huff and her tail held high.

“Can you watch where you’re going?” he complained to his cat, resuming his walk to the stove where the water was boiling noisily, and turning the fire under the kettle off “One of these days I’m gonna step on one of your tiny paws and _ I’m _ gonna cry”

The calico jumped unperturbed to one of his two chairs and watched him from there, smelling the air when he took out the package of her food from the pantry and immediately starting meowing in demand.

“Yeah, I know, shut up” he muttered, filling her bowl and letting her eat while he went to make himself some coffee. He was dead set on working on his writing that night and was going to put his best chances to play. He had the night and the snacks and coffee (and a new loose thread on his sweater thanks to the chair’s crooked nail) and his cat around. His mood had been slightly distracted, detached and floaty all day (hence the loose thread), he could feel it in his fingers, there was something to be written there, his head had something to say. He just needed to pull it out before it vanished.

“Alright” he said to himself, sitting down on his little table with his notebook and laptop “Come on, let’s do this” a fist pump in the air and he picked his pen from the notebook’s spiral.

He passed the pages at random, but it dropped open at the one he had scratched over and over the previous week. He had messed the page up so much he had ended re-writing what little he had on the following blank page and left the unfinished work there, unwilling to repeat the blue carnage of words.

“This bastard” he mumbled, suddenly feeling a little of his initiative drain out of him. But he gave it a try anyway.

… _ Freckled in silver and diamonds _… What had he been trying to say? Where had this one come from? He tried to remember when he had started, what it had spurred the words that died so quickly in his pen. He knew it was the moon, it was the night, you could read that easy enough. It had been a really pretty night, the moon had been bare and confident and the stars were bold and steady, but as much as he had tried looking up night and day for another drop of inspiration to continue, his muse ran dry and the ink wasted in flat lines and scratches on the paper.

And regardless of this very clear on his mind, he still looked up from his notebook, eyes through the window of his kitchen, which overlooked, just like his room, to the miles left of city and coast until the ocean. And open and wide above was the night sky, but the moon was not there. It was just the dark sky that greeted him, absent of the biggest, brightest of its dwellers, the stars doing their best to shine in the void of the moon, yet falling flat. He sighed, resting his head on a hand and staring at the flat block of sky. Not even the stars were nice that night, what a bummer.

“Of all the times I want to continue this crap, I chose tonight” which was kind of a lie, because he had tried many times before. The point stood anyway, and he kept his eyes trained on the boring sky that denied him some aesthetic to fuel his words. 

He heard his cat jump on the chair next to him, meal finished “Come on Mimo, help me out. Do your cat magic” he said, not peeling his attention from the window “Should I start something from scratch?” Mimo chirped at him distractedly as she groomed herself and he took that as a positive “Yeah, maybe I should… But now I’m stumped again” 

The vacant space where he could picture the moon would be that night was starkly dark and flat in between the smatter of struggling stars. It looked deep and never ending, as if he could actually see straight to the endless void of the space. It was almost drawn, painted black in marker, he could line a circle, thicken the lines, fill it in with acrylic, perfect and silver, white, yellow, honey... Copper… It grew more clear as he stared, as if some contrast were sharpening progressively at his mind's persistence. 

He yawned “And tomorrow I have the morning again” 

Or maybe it was the other way around, wisps of something were enveloping the faraway shape, like mist around light. Fog, that’s what it looked like, thick fog like the one that plagued the city near the coast, heavy and damp... 

“I should go to sleep” 

… And so, so cold.

Mimo mewled softly, and Junhoe hummed in response, tracing the curls of mist around the glowing moon. It curtained the lights in opaque white, water floating in the freezing air. _ It was like looking through a cloud, it had grown so thick, heavy and overwhelming, sliding around him coldly, trapping him in solitude. He knew it would be pointless in the new moon, he was lost, blind, deaf… Should be deaf. But there was this pressing thumb over his sternum, and the pulling cord tied to his heart. _

“The moon is gone…”

_ He should be deaf, but he was not. Yes, he was lost... _

He started humming, low and dazed, a song long ago learnt and embraced, feeling the calming sound vibrating from within him.

_ … But he was not deaf, there was his song. There was his secret, beautiful song calling out to him again. _

_ Where was he? _

He felt himself rocking softly to the melody playing in his head, singing the words in half a voice, murmuring or whispering to no one, to the copper moon, to the ocean, to himself. It had been a long time since he had sung this, but it took over him like a sudden high tide, took him away, adrift.

_ He was lost, the fog would not let him see where to go, but he closed his eyes, moon hidden and useless in this night, and drowned in the soothing sound of his song breaking through the mist. _

_ Where _ ** _was_ ** _ he? _

Eyes closed, he could only evision the full, bright moon in his mind, clearing away from mist and clouds, bare and fearless pushing stars aside, golden and silver in day and night. Freckles of diamonds, droplets of water on his skin, silhouette cut in the shadows, two silver moons flashing copper in the dark-

_ “Where are you?” _

Junhoe startled, gasping the next words back inside and stopping his song all at once. The rhythm was off, his heart had rushed, he now felt it thundering inside and echoing in his head. He had a hand on his chest, feeling the hurried pace of his pulse.

Mimo mewled again, louder, and he turned to see her by the door of his room just before she went in to claim his bed for the night. He breathed out long and slowly, trying to get his nerves under control again. Maybe it was time to go to sleep, Mimo was right, he had an early morning.

After cleaning up and locking his door, having turned the lights off, he took one last glance out the window to the sky. The song was leaving him, the moon was still hidden, the stars sad and dim. He moved his eyes down, to the horizon shrouded in shadows, where the ocean met the sky. 

He shuddered, feeling cold, humid air dense against his skin, like mist around him. But it was a fogg-les night, the blind moon cut clean from the sky... No, he really needed to go sleep.

078

_ Golden sand a silk coat inked in lust and desire, _

_ soothing touch of warmth sparking fire _

_ The bloodied moon plunging into the abyss _

_ And your notes of longing engraved by red iron under water _

He blinked, frowning at the messy scrawl of ink on the page, missing lines and margins, wobbling up and down and crossing tops and tails here and there. He didn’t remember writing this down. He would be creeped out by it if not by the fact that it was probably the third time he did something like this the last weeks. Well, maybe he _ was _a bit creeped out. It seemed to him he had started to sleepwalk or something similar. The nap at the little groove, the night at his room, and now this? He was evolving quickly, from crawling to standing and now waxing weird poetic shit, all without noticing. Had it been that weird night when he kinda fell into sleep trance? It had been a week since that moonless night, it had also been the last time he had tried to write.

He turned the page with annoyance, moving from the messily scribbled page to a new one. Was there any point, though? He had been stuck on that freaking burst of words for so long now, and all he had managed was a useless page full of doodles and now a sleepwalking, trance-induced weird ass ghostwriting. Was it even his? Well, the scrawling handwriting was his, if only, clearly, done not looking. But at least it wasn’t so bad, maybe his subconscious could pull some decent wording from his unsuspecting muse this way. It was weird, yeah, but at least it was something, it was going somewhere… Maybe. 

*snap snap*

A pair of fingers were presented an inch away from his nose, snapping loudly and making him go slightly cross eyed. 

“Yo, hello? Earth to June?” it was Chanwoo, of course, being purposefully annoying as his grin denoted “You also space the fuck out at work? What if I was shoplifting, huh?”

He slapped his friend’s hands away form his face with an offended huff “Excuse you, I was paying attention” he lied “I knew it was you”

“Right” Chanwoo nodded, still smiling and clearly not buying his shit “Whatever, listen” he leaned over the counter, his grin growing sweeter.

“Oh, no” Junhoe waved a hand to dismiss him “No, I know what you want. You’re gonna ask some ridiculous favor, I know that face of yours”

“What? No!”

“Oh come off it, you don’t trick me Jung Chanu” he wagged a pointer finger while driving his attention back to the computer screen.

“Shut up, I wasn’t going to ask you for a favor,” he clicked his tongue, looking to the side in a very convincing act of offense. It just didn’t work on Junhoe, he knew the brat too well “But ok, be that way” he shrugged finally, leaning over the counter and idly playing with a pen by the computer mouse, one with a little plaster kitty figure at the top.

“Sure” Junhoe offered at a length, trying to focus on the spread sheet on the screen and not the expectant nonchalance from his friend or the way he tapped the little cat figure of the pen against the counter as if following a rhythm. 

When the tapping grew to a steady percusion session, Junhoe sighed and snatched the pen from his hands “Knock it off, I swear if you break it…” he threw the pen in a drawer and tried focusing back on his screen.

But “You broke it before”

“Yeah, well, it’s _ mine _, so...”

“Whatever” the younger mumbled, picking yet another pen to resume his tapping.

Ten seconds into a new improvised percussion set, Junhoe sighed “Why are you still here?”

Chanwoo responded with a sigh of his own, dramatically disappointed “I mean I just thought maybe you’d be interested and could offer you to come, you know” was his answer, and Junhoe had a moment to feel slightly confused before his friend continued “Knowing how much you like going to the ocean when it’s calm, you know, being the good friend I am…” he shrugged “But it’s ok, I can ask someone else” 

“What?”

“But nevermind, I won’t bother you with it then” he shrugged again, his voice thick with taunt as he plopped the pen back into the holder and stepped away from the counter.

Junhoe watched as he hovered near, inching away slowly as if waiting to be stopped. Which he clearly was, but Junhoe was just not playing into it. Yes, he was curious and yes he wanted to know what interesting offer his friend was talking about, but he was also refusing to give into Chanwoo’s little ruses. 

They must have let a whole dense minute pass holding their ends before Junhoe noted that the younger was starting to look kind of sulky as he looked attentively at his phone. And alright maybe he was actually trying to offer something he thought Junhoe would like and his lack of interest might be a little bit mean. Maybe. And maybe Junhoe had a very tiny, minuscule, almost imaginary soft spot for this goddamn brat and couldn’t really bear his stupid disappointed face and-

“Alright, stop sulking, what is it?”

Chanwoo immediately grinned and leaned over the counter again, showing him the screen of his phone where a photo from a chat was open. Junhoe ignored the triumphant little gleam in Chanwoo’s eyes (and kept the “little shit” commentary for himself) and instead focused on the boat in the picture. It was small fishing boat, looking in good condition and vaguely familiar. Before he could ask, though, Chanwoo, who suddenly looked like a kid on a sugar high, started speaking so quickly he had to focus extra hard not to miss what he was trying to say. 

“So, Moonbin had a friend of his from the mainland visit and he told him that there’s this lake where people go night fishing and that’s really cool because they get rare fish and glowy things and some even see weird shit and he asked his dad and he told him that it’s not done here and he thought maybe it was forbidden or something but no people just don’t do it because the rocks and currents in the bay get too bad at night so it’s dangerous and kinda unproductive because of the whole port and he’d have to go too far and didn’t like that but then he thought what if they move sides and around like the old pier area, has nice depth and is not disturbed but not as wild and it's out the bay and his dad said he could try and he told me if I wanted to and I said yes then I thought it’s the ocean and it’s night and it’ll be weird and creepy and weird and maybe you’d like it so I came to ask you if you wanted to come?” he finished, voice thinning in his expectative and eyes round and bright.

Junhoe took a moment to finish processing the information and making sense of the words hurled in rapid succession until he came to the conclusion that Chanwoo was inviting him to go fishing. Ok. The rest? He was getting there.

“Alright?” he said slowly “So… You are going fishing with this guy Moonbin” Chanwoo nodded, apparently undeterred by his less that excited response “Night fishing” another nod “Somewhere by the old pier” nod nod “And you are going just the two of you?”

“First, I’m also inviting you” his friend held a finger up, then another “second, no, I can’t drive a boat and Bin can’t do it alone so we’re going with his brother” 

“Oh alright” that was a bit more reassuring “So…” he made to tidy the receipts he was sorting into the computer to consider. It was night fishing. Going out into the ocean in a little boat at night, in the dark, for weird creepy fish or creepy things or probably something of the sorts, at the old pier. Well fuck, why in hell had Chanwoo thought he’d be up for any of it? But he was clearly so sure it was a brilliant idea, by the expectant look and the evident excitement in the way he told him about it. Could he really tell him just _ no dude, no way _? If it was at night, maybe he could pull a morning shift to avoid the decision “What...When were you going?”

“This Sunday, you have second shift on Mondays, right?”

Well, there went that. Now what?

“You _ have _ second shift, right?” Chanwoo asked at his two second delay in answer, excitement dwindling a little “I was sure you had, I convinced Bin to go Sunday because I thought you’d be free”

And cue the round puppy eyes and Junhoe cursed in his head. Fuck it “No, yeah, I have. It’s ok, Sunday’s fine”

“Awesome, so you’re coming?” his friend leaned further over the counter, grin back in place.

“Sure, count me in”

It’d probably be a short trip, he doubted they’d catch anything at all and the cold was sure to usher them back home sooner than later. How bad could it be?

118

One thing he had gotten right. It was cold as all fucks. 

“Don’t you h-have the second pair around-d?” he hissed through clattering teeth to Chanwoo, who was on his part fighting his wool hat down to cover his ears as much as he could. Junhoe was crouching against the panels of the cabin, hands crammed tight between his legs, pressed just behind his knees for maximal warmth. Damn the cold for rendering his hands numb and stupid, and damn his numb and stupid hands for losing his own gloves so early into the night. He should have called quits when he felt off that very afternoon “My f-fingers are gonna fall off”

“Ah, I think I had them…” Chanwoo started checking his pockets, his thick padded jacket and then patting inside “I think?”

“Oh god t-tell me you brought them, Chau for the love of all g-good on this earth” he whined in a puff of white breath, rocking slightly on his heels.

“I did, I’m sure I did, I just don’t know where I put them” his friend looked around, hands pressing his hat against his ears and shoulders bunching up to hide his neck. He giggled some of his own white breath “Oh-ho, it’s cold! Perfect night to drop your gloves into the ocean first thing into the trip, eh?” he smiled to Junhoe, little dimple puncturing the corner of his mouth.

“Chanu, I swear to god-”

“Ok, ok, I get it, but I wasn’t the one with buttery fingers, don't get angry at me” he bounced on his heels a little “I’ll go look in my bag” he said before stepping down below deck.

He sighed and looked outside, through the door of the cabin, to the thick fog sliding under the dark night sky and over the inky water. He questioned himself again, why the hell had he agreed to come along? He was freezing, his back hurt, he was starting to get a headache, it was nearly pitch black dark, they had been stuck in the mist for forever now and he didn’t even like fishing. But then he conceded that Chanwoo had been so fucking enthusiastic and even thought of his schedule beforehand and yeah. Whatever. At least his friend (and just everyone except Junhoe, actually) was still optimistic about the whole endeavour.

Coiling himself tighter, he tried his best to cover his hands and neck and not think of his precious gloves lost to the depths. Should have stayed this one out. Chanwoo was a bit of a brat but he’d have understood, maybe, he’d have been pissy for a while but he’d get a pass. That neck pain and the cold spells had tried to warn him earlier in the day but he just was too good a friend, damn it. And now here he was, cold and feeling weird and achey and he was very probably nursing a cold somewhere inside and his drowsy brain had lost him his favourite pair of gloves barely after starting the trip. Just great. 

He had considered for a moment locking himself up in the shoebox sized bed and remain burrito-ed in blankets for the duration of the trip. He wasn’t sure if that wouldn’t be a bit rude of himself, though, so he dropped the idea. He was being such a good sport, Chanwoo should better appreciate that.

“Oh?” the voice of Chanwoo’s friend came from the deck “Joonie, hey, I think fog’s letting on?” 

The brother, a rather short dude with a surprisingly jovial attitude, was checking some thing or another on the control board and hummed abstently in response, so Chanwoo’s friend entered the cabin with a funny smile while pointing back over his shoulder “Hey, Joonie, the fog” he repeated, then noticed Junhoe’s shivering figure pressed against a corner of the cabin “Oh, are you ok? Hey, Joonie, Chan’s friend is…” he hesitated, looking him over quickly as if to assess what exactly was up with him. Junhoe was not very pleased with the situation, but he really didn’t have the energy to fake nonchalance or good disposition “Uh, I think cold? Are you cold?” he asked Junhoe.

Before Junhoe could reply from his very depleted reservoirs of diplomacy, the brother turned around from his whatever task at the board and looked at him with widened eyes, as if he just now noticed he had a passenger freezing his balls two meters behind.

“Ah, but Bin, you can’t let a guest freeze to death! Boy, what have I taught you?” he said in a loud but young voice, apparently a usual pantomime as Moonbin smiled and rolled his eyes slightly, but the older guy went on “This is no way to treat a friend of a friend, what if he gets sick? I’m not paying no medical bills, kid, I have enough to pay for as it is. How long have you had this boy freezing? Oh dear, it’s ok, are your legs still functional? Do you feel your fingers? I don’t think hypothermia kicked in yet, we’re on the clear Bin, we’re good, don’t worry!” 

The younger on his part chuckled and shook his head calmly “Alright so, do I fetch a blanket?”

“Blanket, nah!” the other waved him off “That’s a never ending cycle, he needs to warm up from the inside!” he smiled, and Junhoe was just a bit too cold and achey to bother answering his personal thoughts on that.

“Uh, I don’t know…” Moonbin’s voice sounded much doubtful than his overly enthusiastic brother.

“I do know!” the oldest of them laughed, then proceeded to stride confidently to Junhoe, the glint of purpose terrifyingly sparkly in his eyes “We’ll find you something to do”

Oh no, he knew that look, it was scarily similar to Chanyeol’s just before putting him to haul a whole greasy engine or unload three bikes from his truck because he “looked bored”. Where was Chanwoo when he needed him? 

“C’mon buddy, you’ll warm up in a blink, you’ll see” the short guy was saying as he softly pulled at his arm to prompt him up. 

Sighing, Junhoe resigned to his fate without much fight because, well, he was really cold and maybe he’d be given some silly chore as he was a guest of sorts. Maybe a distraction would help him keep his mind off the cold and make time move faster. But the moment he stood to his full height, (which by the way took a head over their impromptu captain) the shivers on his arms poured all over his back and a swarm of freaky little dots clouded his sight for some terrifying seconds as he lost his balance. A weird rush of warmth ran up his spine, quick and misplaced, and he then felt a dampness he had not noticed before under his shirt. 

When he blinked the dots away and his head stopped swaying, he noticed the two brothers staring at him with caution.

“Alright there big boy?” the older asked, clearly having left the joking spirits aside “You sure is just cold you have?”

“I’m…” he started, noticing how dry his mouth was and how he kinda needed some extra air to just speak “I dunno, I don’t think I feel so good”

“Yeah, no shit” the short guy said curtly, but still pulled him softly closer, placing a hand on his forehead and immediately clicking his tongue, face turning to a reproachful scowl that transformed his demeanor considerably. Suddenly he did look like the oldest of them “Take him to rest, Bin” he said with no preambles.

“What is it?” the younger brother asked, even as he stepped forward to comply.

“He’s got a fever, just look at him” he waved a hand over his height, “You sure he was ok before?”

“Yeah, he looked fine” Moonbin started guiding him to the stairs to below deck, and Junhoe was surprised how much he actually relied on his help “Chan didn’t say anything either”

He didn’t hear anything from the older brother, and for a moment he felt a strange sense of guilt and shame course through him. He turned his head and actually tried to apologize to the man, but he found him with a slightly admonishing but kind expresion, just like what Yunhyeong would look like when miffed yet used to their antics.

“No fishing for you tonight big guy” he said lightly, his smile returning with more gentleness “You sleep this off and maybe next time, eh?”

He said nothing to this, just let himself be guided down to one of the little bunk beds. Chanwoo was actually standing just by one, immersed in his phone, when Moonbin shoved him out if the way to help Junhoe climb up the top one.

“Huh? What are you doing?” he asked.

“Dude, your friend’s sick, he’s got a fever”

“What? Sick?” Chanwoo asked, sounding as confused as Junhoe himself was “Are you serious, Junhoe?”

But Junhoe was in no mood to talk, he grunted his way under the covers and curled in on himself, shivering violently under the new warmth and uselessly shifting to get away from the sticky sweat building on his back.

“Come on, Chan, you come help us out, the fog seems to be shifting some. I'll see if we have something to get his fever down and he’ll sleep this one off”

The friend walked away, and after a short moment of silence, Junhoe heard Chanwoo murmur something, and then, louder-

"Should have told me man, but well, your loss anyway” he said, almost uncaringly, even though Junhoe felt very distinctively the blanket being pulled up high under his chin and tucked into the mattress tightly.

Chanwoo was annoyingly good at making it hard to be truly annoyed with him. 

It was with thoughts of this kind, one chunky pill and one glass of cold water in, that he started drifting off into a messy rest, although calling it “rest” was being optimistic.

He was now recognizing fully the symptoms of his fever, the shivers and cold, sweat and sore muscles, the persistent headache and patchy throat. He started swinging in between uncomfortable wakings and restless slumber. 

The nature of his little bunker would not make it easier for him either, the unfamiliar place, sounds and smells were playing tricks and pranks on his mind and body and he would wake up startled to imaginary visitors and floods more than once. At some point he swore there was a fish staring at him from the little window; dead, yellowed eyes pinned on him, unblinking, swaying to the dark waves and giving him nausea both from the movement and the sheer (albeit maybe irrational) fear it provoked in him.

Then his matress was floating, the water leaking in from the stairs somewhere, he could hear the rush and the splatter. The voices of the other guys distant and frantic. He tried sitting up quickly, heart pumping fast in fright, his whole body protested in shivers and aches, his head particularly so. His stomach rolled a little and the rush of water got louder, closer.

He tried fruitlessly getting off the bed, going to the other guys, they were leaving the sinking boat, had they forgotten he was down there? Were they leaving him? Chanwoo would remember he was there, right? Right? 

His legs were tangled in the blankets, and the tiny space of the bunk bed did not allow his heavy and sore body to move quickly enough, he was stuck. He called for his friend, but his voice was clogged somewhere in his neck. He let out a weak whimper as he tugged feebly at the tip of the thick cover, just as he caught a stray reflex of what must have been water on the floor. 

He couldn’t hear the others anymore, they were gone, he’d been left behind. The fear and anguish overpowered him suddenly and he couldn’t help to sob and trash around on his narrow bed. He was gonna drown now and his friend had forgotten about him and he was angry and sad and didn't want to get wet, he was sick, dammit! 

He kicked at his blankets again and sniffed, struggled to sit, swayed steeply to a side and then back, whined softly. The rush of water was too close now and he wanted to go back home. He felt the sobs climbing up his throat as the water grew closer, but just as he was starting to build up the despair, the invasive sound flattened out. It mellowed down smoothly into a whisper, flowing and murmuring instead of splashing and pushing. It grew depth, air, wind, it was now distant and open. 

Junhoe was suddenly hearing the ocean in the open and not water in the cabin. It was clear and enveloping in soft hushed notes and… Comforting. 

The glistening dark below him was no longer, the sparks of water now blinked at him from the window, the fish was gone. It was gone and Junhoe’s relief was even bigger than for the water disappearing from the floor. He let his eyes close, feeling the dread of the incoming flood and the peering fish alleviating from his head, his headache stepping down a meager notch as he stopped focusing his sight on the dark.

“Thank god” he was whispering to the room, following a cold surge with a shiver and picking his blanket up to his neck again, pulling it tight around himself in search for some warmth. 

He sighed deeply, emptying his chest before breathing in again, hearing the soft whispering of the water follow him now, gently and patient, rolling in his head and pillowing his thoughts so they wouldn’t run away from him again. It enveloped him, isolating his feverish senses from the madness outside, hugging him close to its peace and hush. He felt himself swaying softly along with it, to a side, the other, forward, the side.

He touched the wall with a shoulder, collapsed against it, still wrapped in his blanket and the soothing currents of the ocean in his mind. His headache was now just echoing somewhere in the back, his eyes resting shut, his breathing serene, his thoughts floating aimlessly on the harmless tide. His head lolled to the side, tapping his forehead against the cold window, humid and blind.

The pressure behind his eyes had loosened up so much, he felt light, free, but anchored to safety as his center of gravity had returned to its place. He blinked his eyes open, to the window, to darkness and water, the deep night and a moon somewhere above. He pulled his hand slowly from his cocoon, shifting it up with effort until his fingertips shivered just away from the fogged view. He could feel the cold and the dampness in the hairwidth distance, see his own breath clouding warm against the surface. 

His fingers were still trembling, weakness, effort, cold or something else, he did not know. But he shifted his index, closer to the night, to the cold. He was watching intently at his fingertip, at its reflection approaching from the opposite, index to index against the window, the touch cold and wet. He followed with his palm, braving the shivers to press it against the outside, melting against his reflection, fingers pale and ghostly from the other side. Slender, _ thinner _. His reflection was thinner, oddly shorter, white and… Mismatching, the thumb just below, the wrist bent away. His reflection moved without him, shifted to match his palm better, and Junhoe watched in awe as it moved, twitched, crawled against his still hand. His reflection was warm, his own palm soaking heat through the window like a leech. 

A humming sound broke through the whisper of the ocean filling his head, deep and rumbling, like pulling from his heart down, vibrating deep within his own chest. He knew this humming sound, he had heard it, _ felt _ it before. It made his blood run faster, lighter; his lungs feel deeper, his heart bigger. It was warm but distant, eerie and lonely and strangely moving. 

But not now.

Now it was warmer than ever, its rumbling setting sparks to his throat. It was calling and soothing, yet strangely possessive. It was longing and eerie, but close, so much closer. But how? How was it? How could he even know this? He didn’t, he felt it.

He felt it in the rumble and the weight, in the warmth in his palm and his face… His face was warm, he was pressed against the window, not only his hand but his forehead, and at some point his cheek. And it was damp, yes, but not cold at all. He watched the strange, mismatched reflection of his hand and then blinked slowly, moving his sight closer. Would his own reflection be mismatched too? Would he look paler, thinner, off to a side maybe? That’d be scary, but would it?

He shifted slightly, eyes blinking to focus in the close distance. Where was his reflection? It was too close, he could not see clearly, it was there, though. Pale again… And so off set. It was lower, almost half a head down. Why was he so off? Was it the water? Was it-?

His reflection moved then, but he hadn’t. The pale blur shifted upwards, as if trying to match with him again. It shouldn’t, why was it... _ What _ was it?

He tried focusing his eyes, but were those his eyes on the window? They must have been, but they were not. Because the eyes of his reflection blinked, and he did not, or did he? And then he did, heavy and drowsy, one blink and when he opened them again, he had lost his reflection to the night. 

The water rolled higher outside, swallowing the unfocused vision, splashing the window, it took all away. The fog, the hand, the eyes, his reflection. The warmth. It all left.

The humming sound pulled back sharply, almost ripping a piece of his spine out of him in the way. It emptied his head and left him bare and hollow, cold inside and out and it took the ocean and its whispers with it. It was all ripped off from him in a shallow breath. Gone. 

He tried to fill his hollow chest with air, but it was cold and damp, and the sounds all around him were clattering back in a cacophony of dissonance and reality that floored him back to the bunk bed and the boat and his fever roaming around in his head. 

“-ne?”

He blinked at the window, now much clearer and… Real. The water outside was rolling and droplets clung to the surface. He saw the sky up and the wooden wall around, he saw himself now in the reflection, translucent and flimsy, his meager carbon copy, as any reflection would look- 

“June!”

He startled and turned his head. Chanwoo was looking at him with his eyebrows up from the door of the tiny bedroom. 

“You ok?”

He took a moment to fully reconnect with his surroundings and then hummed “Y-yeah, I guess”

Chanwoo on his part seemed to quickly asses him before shrugging minimally “Well, you look, like, marginally less like shit”

“Oh, thanks for that” he retorted without much energy, but noticing that it was much easier to thread thoughts with words now. He must’ve been better then, maybe the nap did help some. Even if he wasn’t sure how much he slept or if he slept at all. He had some fucking weird dreams, that’s for sure.

“You’re welcome” his friend smiled chirpily, then turned to go.

“What, is that what you came down here for?” he asked after Chanwoo as he left, only slightly offended.

“Just checking if you were still kicking” his friend’s voice answered from somewhere below deck, probably already climbing back the stairs if the creaking wood was any indication.

He sighed in reluctant dejection at this, staring a little at the door and then back to the little window. The night still looked deep and cold, the fog much thinner and dispersed by then. The water didn’t look particularly agitated, just… Dark. 

He shifted closer, inspecting the thick glass to find his vague fingerprints splayed on a side, nothing but the stickiness of his sweaty, feverish body against the cold surface. But as the water and fog shifted outside, the steadiness of the window gave him an anchor to notice something else. On the slowly reshaping condensation there was something accompanying his own fingers on the panel. He swiped at his side, water collecting in his hand and smearing on the window, wiping his fingerprints from it. And yet he was still left staring at the outside counterpart, pale and stumped in five singular points. Five fingertips pressed to the glass, but from the outside.

A loud bang from the deck broke him apart from his musings, and the following shuffling and racket kept his attention pinned to the door for a moment. It was then that he noticed the lonely mug steaming from its perch on the tiny table attached to the wall, just beside his phone and under the light switch. He blinked at it vacantly for a second before snorting and rubbing at his temples softly, because right beside the mug rested a little packed cookie, just like those Chanwoo had brought in his bag to snack on the way. 

“Just checking if you’re kicking” he mocked softly, but unable to stop the grateful smile pulling from his mouth. He leaned over the edge of the bunk bed and reached to the mug “Stupid brat” 

By the time he had downed both tea and cookie- which hadn’t been more than few minutes honestly- he was feeling much more like himself already. The ghost of the headache was echoing somewhere in his head and his back was a bit tense and achey, but the worst of it all seemed to have dissolved. 

He was pointedly ignoring the dark view through the window, just peaking once or twice to make sure no weird fish was staring at him and no weird dopplegänger fingerprints were pressed on the glass. He thought it was a bit too soon to be having cabin fever but damn, those had been some vivid hallucinations.

The sudden rumbling of the engines almost made him drop the empty mug, and he hurried to climb down the bed and wobble his way to the little kitchen just outside to drop it on the counter. The boat was now swaying noticeably, probably just starting to move, and it took some effort not to fall flat on his ass as he moved to the stairs.

With one foot on the first step, though, the boat lurched and he effectively crashed on his bottom, only to be found by Chanwoo’s friend peeking down from the deck.

“Oh” he said, looking confused for a moment, then smiled “You look better! We’re already going back anyway”

“You missed the whole fishing of the fishing trip” Chanwoo piped from behind his friend “That’s a very _ you _thing to do, huh?” 

“Shut up” he said into a groan, laboriously standing up with the help of Moonbin “And thank you for the tea and cookie, it was good”

Chanwoo snorted at that, mumbling some unintelligible words into his trademark high pitched awkward speech before finally saying “What are you talking about? Myungjoon told me to bring that” as he shrugged the topic off and turned back to the deck.

Moonbin, on his part, was smiling openly at Junhoe and slightly shaking his head in denial, then silently mouthing enough for him to read “No he didn’t” and rolling his eyes.

“You can go back to rest, we’ll call you when we’re docked” the young guy finally added before returning to deck.

Junhoe wasn’t sure what to feel, he was much better and didn’t want to feel useless, but he also didn’t want to go back to the biting cold outside. Maybe he could help out… With something.

“Oh!” Chanwoo’s voice resonated from upstairs “I almost forgot,” he peeked again from the stairs to where Junhoe was still stalling. His face was now illuminated with something of a mix between amusement and wonder “Look what we caught just before calling it a night”

He had a towel bundled up in his hands, it was pale and so the dark green inside was popping out glaringly. He stepped close and reached for the garment, soaked wet and freezing cold, but otherwise intact and clean. 

A pair of gloves, _ his _ gloves.

For a moment it didn’t register in Junhoe’s mind the oddity of it, he was just relieved to have retrieved his gloves, but just after taking hold of them, his brain caught up to the circumstances and froze.

“Wait… How…?”

“Right?” Chanwoo emphasized, eyes big and round “What the hell, right?”

“But did you... I mean, where did you get them from?”

“Duh, the water?”

“What?”

“The sea, man, we fished them out”

“How did-?”

“With the fucking fishing rod, dude, plucked them out like a trout!” then made a mindblown motion with his hand next to his head, laughing in amazement as Junhoe himself stared in confusion “They were tangled in a piece of net that must have snagged from some other boat, but what are the odds?”

“I... I don’t-”

“You have a personal lucky charm somewhere”

He scoffed at that “Yeah, no, I doubt that”

“Right, because it’s just daily happenstance that you drop your gloves in the ocean in the middle of the night and then fish them out miles away, intact” Chanwoo swept a hand in front of him, dismissive “Just like keys in your pocket”

“Alright, alright, I get it… But I’m not lucky, this was just… Odd”

“That it was, but hey!” he patted his shoulder softly “Lucky this time at least, some nice fish brought you your gloves back”

With that, he returned to the deck, only turning to remind Junhoe to go back to nap until they made it to the docks. But Junhoe was still hanging onto the pair of wet gloves on his hands, which had apparently followed them all the way and then pierced themselves to the hook? Tied themselves on a net and _ then _pierced themselves on the hook? What was all this? He couldn’t help a quick shiver running down his spine, thinking of exactly what had pulled the garments along their boat. Had they gotten stuck to it, somehow? 

He squeezed them tightly, letting cold water drip copiously on the floor. They looked to be really intact, not even a piece of seaweed stuck to them. Just drenched. He squeezed them again, shaking more water out of them, but a weird crunchy sensation gave him pause. He rubbed his fingers on the fabric slowly, pressing along the palms. There was something inside one of the gloves.

Hoping fervently it wasn’t some fish remains, he started turning them inside out, but what fell to the floor was no dead animal. Something tiny and thin clattered quietly on the wooden boards, catching stray glimmers in the light. 

He crouched down, cautiously and still plenty confused, and examined what looked to be a long, slender band of some type of shiny material. He picked it up gently, feeling the smooth pieces under his fingertips. It looked like the inside of seashells, pearly colours almost washed out, dimmed somehow but still holding to shadows of their hues, all except for one, at the end, bigger, fully red. That one clearly a scale of some type. The thin pieces were tied together by a much coarser, thicker fabric, black and roughed up by water. The ends looked frayed and twisted, as if they had been cut off and tied for a very long time, or maybe until very recently. 

Completely baffled by the whole situation, he stood up and walked back to the bunk beds, attention still captivated by the unassuming little trinket in his hands. But there was nothing he could do to stop himself from pocketing it back into his wet glove, wrapping it carefully and placing it in the towel and at the very top of his bag. He really had no idea what the little thing was, where it had come from or how it had gotten into his glove. Just like he didn’t know how his gloves had returned to him. Or what he had exactly seen on the other side of the window in his feverish dreams. If they had been a dream at all.

He almost welcomed the unpleasant roll of uneasiness and fear in his stomach, but as much as the hairs at the back of his neck stood in uncanny discomfort, the last echoes of that lonely, strangely yearning humm still nested deep in his chest.

It would only be finally overthrown by the cold shivers of unease once they were walking down the pier, bags and equipment loaded and legs readjusting to the firm ground. He was lagging slightly behind, still exhausted from the fever, and letting the three actual fishers chatter away about their trip. 

It was just about half the long wooden platform that he felt it, intense and searing against his back, pinching at his spine like prickles of static, the feeling of being watched. He tried not to look back for a moment, tired of the oddities and eeriness of the night and wanting nothing but to go back to the safety of his home and sleep all the confusion away until it was nothing but nightmarish fever delusions. 

But he turned, the strange feeling too strong to ignore. And it was just the water for a moment, the boat still and resting, the night deep and still strong, the moon high above, the few, lonely lights around the pier. And the dark water glistening under the light, ripples of the tide moving here and there. Silver, calm... And then still, strangely still. One blotch of dark stillness in between the tendrils of silver, two single dots unmoving, just past the end of the pier. Silverish, focused, like the eyes of a cat reflecting the moon in the night, staring straight at him. 

He turned around quickly, hurrying his way to catch up with the other three and ignoring the hammering in his chest and the building cold sweat on his neck. Enough for the night, it was enough of the weird shit for one night. He was clearly still feverish and his mind was playing tricks on him still. It was probably just a play of the lights on the water and the shadows and his tired eyes. There could be no cat floating in the water, staring at him unabashedly from the darkness, silent and unmoving, shining their eyes in silver and red. 

There could not.

128

The coffee had gotten cold already, he knew that, felt the tepid temperature on the ceramic. But he just couldn’t peel his eyes from the rippling liquid shaking as he softly tapped the side of the mug. His mind was stuck to this movement, yet far away, watching over the ripples and waves of much colder, larger, deeper waters. Unforgiving depths, not as pleasant and comforting as the drink between his hands.

“Come on, Dong, drink that before it gets cold”

“It’s already cold” he mumbled in response.

“Well, give me, I’ll warm it up for you”

“Nah, don’t bother” he sighed, taking a little sip and grimacing at the unpleasant sensation of tepid coffee.

He got a click of tongue for that. 

“Give me that, don’t be silly” a pair of gentle but firm hands took the mug from his reluctant fingers, then pressed softly on his shoulder before leaving along with his step brother towards the kitchen “Ease up, kid. It’ll be fine”

He sighed, pressing his face to his palms “You don’t know that”

“No, I don’t, but I can strive for some hope”

“What’s the point-?”

“Donghyuk, we’ve been through this already. You can’t do much more than wait, they’ll reach out, just trust them”

“What if they can’t?”

“The issue lays with your brother, not them. They should be free to move as always-”

“They _ know _ they’re close, they _ know _they have helped him before”

“They’ve known that for a long while now, and it never came to blunder their freedom of movement”

“It’s different now, you know that!”

“Calm down Donghyuk, yelling at me won’t help anyone”

He opened his mouth to protest, but one look at his step brother was enough to silence his rebuttal. His face and demeanor were still gentle but his eyes were set on a firm reproach, and he looked tired. He was surely tired of it all, as was Donghyuk himself. But he was more worried than anything, and Donghyuk could understand that.

“I know” he said at a length, defeated “I just… I can’t stand sitting on my hands and waiting when I know I might have screwed things-”

“No, no, stop that. You are not starting on that again”

“Kyungsoo-”

“Enough,” he was interrupted in a voice now slightly louder and sharper “I told you a hundred times already that it was not your fault. You should have never been tasked with such awful endeavor in the first place” his step brother returned, mug steaming again, and sat the ceramic loudly on the table. He was clearly building a temper now “How it occured to them that you should do so baffles me, but if I were to have a few words with any of them I’d-”

“I-I know, I know” he held the other’s arm, pulling softly to make him sit beside him “You’ve told me a hundred times, yeah?”

His step brother huffed sharply, pursuing his lips in clear disapproval, but apparently, luckily, choosing not to continue that particular conversation. Noticing this, Donghyuk tried to apaciguate both their moods, offering truce and doing just what the other was trying minutes prior.

“I understand, but… It’s done, I won’t say I’m proud of it or that I fully understood but, this is them and their laws, Kyungsoo. If something like that wasn’t done… Isn’t done…”

The other sighed “It’s done. You told me this was it, you did all you could, and that’s it, right?”

“Yeah, yeah. I… I guess”

“Donghyuk, you promised this was the end of it” the shift in tone, from suspicious to imploring, made something seize up in pure guilt inside him. 

He had caused so much concern and unrest to his brother, to _ this _ brother of his, he really couldn’t let him worry anymore for him. Heaven’s knew he had had enough of the ocean and its cruelty, the stray shimmer just under the collar of his shirt reminded him so. 

“No, yeah, it’s over, I’m out. It’s not what I meant, please don’t worry about it. I just feel like I left things… Undone, I don’t know”

“No, Donghyuk, you did far more than you should have been asked to. You did your part, you did what they should have done themselves if they really wanted to keep such…” he seemed to look for the right wording “vengeful and feudal way of justice”

He couldn’t help a sad smile at his brother’s way of expression, still trying to stay diplomatic when this probably brought back so many sour memories to him. 

Deciding to cut away from the painful topic, he relaxed against the backrest of the chair and took a sip of the re-warmed coffee, humming in appreciation and directing a thankful smile to his stepbrother. This seemed to ease the other’s worry a little, as he allowed himself to relax his heavy frown and pull a hint of a smile in return. 

And yet, Donghyuk needed to get something clear at least. One last thing.

“But,” he started, trying to sound both firm and polite, just like Kyungsoo could with such ease. It was not a feat Donghyuk could mimic easily, but he tried, but his step brother immediately picked up on his effort and adopted a cautious expression. He continued “I will continue to go north”

For a second he thought the other would protest or fret over him again, but just a few seconds of contemplative silence were enough, and he just sighed.

“Are you sure about that?” he was asked, softly. He knew very well it was a delicate subject for him, and Donghyuk appreciated his leniency, just as he knew that deep down he understood why he needed to do this.

“Positive. I know it may be pointless, but I’ll keep trying. I can’t bear the chance of him coming back and not finding me there, I wouldn’t… I can’t do that to him”

“They told you not to bother, they told you he couldn’t go back” he said, albeit without much conviction.

“They say many things, not all of them are set in stone. I understand they may be trying to keep me or him or both safe, but I don’t care. If I’d wanted to stay safe I’d never gone to meet them in the first place, this is not about it, he’s- he’s...” he looked up, feeling his heart growing heavy and troubled, but the soft, understanding look in his step brother’s eyes put a cold press on his agitation ”You know” he said finally, and Kyungsoo just nodded slowly.

“I know,” he agreed, his voice soft, reaching a hand to pluck his fingers from their tight hold on the mug and rub the tension away “I know”

In that moment, his phone piped from the table with a new message. Peering at the screen, he saw it read _ Yunhyeongie _ and reflexively looked at his stepbrother, unable to stop the mild blush when he noticed he was also watching the screen, only with a knowing smile on his usually stoic face. 

“Uh, it’s…” he started, immediately regretting it because why should he explain who he was texting with? It just made things worse.

And as expected, it did. Kyungsoo lifted one single, thick eyebrow at him in amused question, his lips pressing lightly, probably stopping the smile from growing. 

“Yeah?” he asked, his voice clearly playful.

Donghyuk laughed awkwardly and picked his phone “No, you know, it’s… It’s just this guy from the north bay, this… Uh, this dude-”

“Uh-huh” his brother singsonged “Yunhyeong, I remember him” he nodded, holding himself back just a second before adding “So, _ Yunhyeongie _, huh?”

“Ah, shut up, don’t make it weird” he whined childishly, knowing very well it was his ticket out of a very uncomfortable situation. 

As predicted, his brother rolled his eyes and stood up “I’m not making anything weird, you are being too obvious” he poked his forehead with a finger before walking away.

“I’m not” he said to himself, opening the chat with a little smile. 

It was a building routine of theirs now, texting good morning or maybe good day, having at least one little conversation each day, if only about something yummy they ate or a cat they found or some friend being annoying. That last option had been today’s topic, as Yunhyeong greeted him good morning with a picture of Junhoe knocked out on a table of his family's restaurant, hair sticking out in all directions and clothes rumpled.

It seemed he had skipped sleep and crashed first thing in the morning at the family shop crying of hunger. And then proceeded to inhale half his food and collapse on the table.

**Yunhyeongie**

He’s out like a brick

I don’t know if I should let him sleep on or wake him

Does he have work today?

Yeah, but the second shift… altho i’m pretty sure he’d want to shower before that

lol id imagine, was he out partying last night or what?

nah, he went night fishing with Chanu

don’t know what kind of fishing they did tho

Oh rlly? thats weird

Is it?

Before he could even organize his own ideas and doubts about that, Yunhyeong spammed a few incoherent lines of letter smash and then a very distressed looking emoji.

what??

he’s drooliiinnngggggg!!!

He snorted loudly, covering his mouth not to catch the attention of his brother.

LOOOOL

on the tableeeeee

Cue another string of distressed emojis, and then, after a second’s pause, a picture. Donghyuk was already ughing before the image fully loaded, the close up of the guy in question taken clearly by a troubled Yunhyeong as he had added little arrows pointing to the mouth hanging slightly open.

He snorted ungracefully, luckily his coffee away from him. Up close the guy looked almost hungover, with the shadow of stubble, dark circles and, indeed, little pool of drool just below his slack mouth.

Hes a mess Yoyo! wake him up

His answer was another little emoji, and he sniggered some more while looking at the sad picture again. But his amusement was short lived, and was immediately snuffed like a little flame against the wind as he looked in more detail at the image on his screen. 

He felt his smile recede and his confusion settle in his brow, tapped the picture and zoomed in to the sleeping man’s hand. 

The mirth was gone, completely. He felt something hard and hollow lodge in his chest, ignoring the buzzing of his phone as new messages came in.

“What the fuck” he whispered to himself, unable to pluck his eyes from the hand on the picture, the wrist bare, shirt sleeve rolled back to the guy’s elbow. 

It was tied around the bare skin, black cord and pearly plaques, the reddish hue barely visible in the sloppy picture, the silver ones at the sides, two and two, then a new one, a drop of blood red at the edge, crimson as the single red thread coiled in between. That was a new one, but it made it all the more evident. There was no mistaking it, that was not Junhoe’s, and the question of how he had gotten his hands on it unsettled Donghyuk beyond measure.

He was not one to think ill of people, and had stuck to this even after the unfortunate scene he had had with the guy back at the bay city, under the rain. But he couldn’t reign in his anger as he watched, barely holding himself back from questioning Yunhyeong on how the fuck that had fallen into the other guy’s hands. 

“You son of a bitch” he muttered between his teeth, glaring daggers at his phone “Why the fuck do you have that?” 

He wasn’t supposed to get himself into more trouble, but he really wanted to have a talk with this Junhoe guy again. This was not ok.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you are liking it so far! Let me know ❤


	4. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See, I shouldn't be posting, I shouldn't because the following chap is so far from being done and this is the kinda position that cramms my writting into a bottle neck. So yeah, this is a bad decision and I'm very aware of this, but I was feeling very unproductive and stuck and classes just resumed and I realized it'll be a very long time before I can touch this again and I really needed to feel I could get something, anything, done.
> 
> So here we are.
> 
> Hopefully the baby steps this fic is taking will sufice for now (and the foreseeable future) and I really hope you like it!
> 
> On to the chap.

128

He all but crashed against the door of his apartment after failing to unlock properly, cursing out loud and taking a moment to gather himself before pulling away and trying again at the key. It was surprising how hard it could be to do something as simple as coordinate his hands to turn a key and open the door he had been opening for years. But it was, it took him two more tries while getting increasingly frustrated and hearing Mimo’s demanding meowing from the other side growing confused.

He stumbled in, body heavy and sore, almost stepping on his cat’s tail and simply dropping his bag on the floor while he shut the door by leaning back on it heavily. He was so fucking tired. And hungry. And yucky. He had skipped the shower having falling asleep on his kitchen table after returning from Yunhyeong's family restaurant. He had had barely enough time to feed Mimo- who had woken him up -and change out of the clothes of the night fishing trip before running to work.

So yeah, he felt like a disgusting mess, probably looked like one.

“Ok, let me… ” he grunted, struggling to straighten up and move to feed the cali for the night. She, on her part, amped her demands when she noticed him moving, walking in between his feet and leaning against him as they walked to the point of Junhoe having to hold onto a chair not to stumble and fall. 

“Stop it, Mimo!” he chastised her, tired and wanting nothing but to eat, shower and sleep. At his scolding tone, the cat stepped away slightly, looking at him in mild offence, but finally allowing him to walk normally. 

He took a step towards the kitchen counter, but a sharp pull at his wrist made him stop abruptly and gasp in alarm. His heart gave a stray hard kick at his chest and he felt his stomach about to drop as he slowly turned and shifted his left arm. 

With careful fingers, he plucked the black thread from the nail sticking from the chair where it had gotten caught, and then brought his arm back close to his chest, gently cradling his wrist in his other hand as he inspected the pearly little plaques to make sure they were undamaged.

He didn’t realise how tense he had gotten until he felt his spine relax and the air he had been holding come out in a relieved sigh. 

Mimo’s demands for food brought him back to the task at hand, and he resumed his chores, albeit with a much more alert mind now.

It was long after, eaten, showered and ready for bed, that he gave himself a second to think that brief moment over. It had been, for all accounts, nothing but a slight accident. One that had happened numerous times already (he really needed to get that chair fixed), and yet the sudden alarm that had overtaken him that very moment had not been present any other time before. Not even when he dropped his phone after getting his sleeve caught.

He pondered this as he watched the bracelet, just like he wondered, again, why he had felt like wrapping it around his wrist in the first place. And he had no real answer for that either. He had just left it on the table, and then felt the urge to hold it, not to lose it, to keep it close. So he had done what he thought was the more reasonable route of action and wore it. After all the ocean had kind of gifted it to him, right? It was in  _ his  _ glove. It was as his as it would get. 

* * *

138

**Unknown**

_ Message deleted 06:14 _

_ Message deleted 07:05 _

_ Message deleted 07:31 _

_ Message deleted 08:12 _

_ Message deleted 08:14 _

Junhoe narrowed his eyes, rubbing on the left one with the heel of his hand and blinking to focus on the screen again. He was recently awoken, had just come out of the bathroom and thought he had heard his phone  _ ping _ with a new message. But this odd scenario is what he had found, apparently having just missed the last one, as his phone read now 08:16.

He pondered over it for just a moment before shrugging it off. It was very likely someone with the wrong number realising it a bit too late and deleting all messages in embarrassment. It had happened to him before so he was not judging this confused soul. No big deal.

What was a big deal… Or maybe just a deal. Whatever, the fact was that he had the first shift today, so he needed to get his coffee going. Now. 

It was 20 minutes later that found him two blocks away from his apartment, power walking to the crossing where he usually met Yunhyeong to join him on his way to the market. He saw his friend standing against the wall, looking busy with his phone.

“Hey” he said when he walked up to him, breathing a little heavy from his hurry.

“Hey” Yunhyeong said back, not looking up from his phone. He made a face and then pocketed the thing harshly, as if it had somehow offended him “Let’s go?”

“Yeah, let’s go” he nodded.

Junhoe was not a particularly attentive person, you should know this, but there was something very odd about Yunhyeong being as terse and quiet as he was being that morning. There was also a rather heavy look about him, in his expression, as if he were constantly fighting off a frown. 

He tried asking, in the best Junhoe fashion, how he was doing and the likes, but he only got a noncommittal  _ fine  _ as answer. So he left it at that.

Different case was when, after pulling his phone from his pocket for the third time in the scarce minutes they had walked, his friend all but walked straight into the traffic while tapping at the screen. Junhoe thanked his quick reflexes that, despite himself being half the time spaced out, kicked in immediately to pull the other man back from his cardigan. He was actually so quick that there wasn’t even a stray honk directed at them.

“What-?”

“Pay attention, Yun!” he stressed, voice loud enough to gather some attention from other morning pedestrians “Light’s green for traffic, man!” he sharply waved at the street, and Yunhyeong took a moment to understand the whole situation before looking back at Junhoe with a face that clearly denoted delayed shock.

“Oh, I-... I’m so distracted, I didn’t see…”

“Yeah, I can tell” he huffed, feeling the stray little spark of adrenaline settle down “Geez, man, what’s with you and that phone today? You can’t rely on  _ me  _ of all people to stop you from walking straight to your death”

“Well… “ he seemed doubtful for a second, then sighed “But you just did, thank you June” he gave him a half side hug, rubbing at his arm before resuming his walk (now at the right time) “Sorry for being so distracted”

“It’s ok” he mumbled, walking beside him.

He threw a few looks his way, noticing how he checked on his phone and frowned slightly. He wasn’t sure if there would be any point in asking, Yunhyeong didn’t seem to be all that willing to spill. But, to his surprise, the moment they reached the other side of the street, his friend leaned on him softly and started talking.

“It’s nothing really, it’s just… It’s Donghyuk. He’s being so weird and I don’t understand if it’s something I said or what” he peeked at his phone quickly, then straightened up “He was just fine yesterday morning and then stopped answering, then was back to normal for like an hour and then got… Just... Like, snappy and curt. And now he spoke to me at like 6 in the morning and I replied to him when I woke up past 7 and maybe he got mad for that? I don’t know, but now he’s not answering again and I’m just confused”

“Oh,” Junhoe offered simply, honestly at a loss of what to say “yeah that’s weird” Human relationships and their nuances were  _ not _ his forte, at all.

Yunhyeong shook his head and breathed out deeply, as if shaking it off “It’s ok, maybe I’ll try calling him later. He’s not been answering messages, but maybe we can talk it out. I’ll just give him some time”

“Sure, you do that” he mumbled unsure, and Yunhyeong, knowing him too well, chuckled at his passive response “What? I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say, I don’t give good advice for this” he defended himself, but his friend just shook his head and smiled at him.

“I know, I know, it’s ok. Just tell me, would you be up for some take-out if he keeps being weird and I get sad?”

He huffed a stray laugh “Yeah, sure, I’ll let you pick. And we can get drunk and talk shit about him all night if you want. I can do that at least” then thought about that for a second and added “Well, you’ll get drunk, I’ll probably just gather blackmail material”

Yunhyeong laughed “That won’t be necessary, but thanks for the sentiment”

A bit more high in the spirits, Yunhyeong finally gave his phone a rest and engaged with Junhoe in some chit chat until they reached the bookstore. It was 9:02 and he could see Sungwoon just opening the shop inside.

“Alright, go June, have a nice day” Yunhyeong pushed him softly.

“Sure, you too” he said absentmindedly as he stepped into the store, but then turned around and called after his friend, maybe just a bit louder than needed “And let me know if we gang up on Donghyuk tonight, don’t get too down if he’s being stupid”

He was gifted a bright smile and a last wave “Will do, thanks!” before his friend walked away.

“Well good morning to you, June” the owner’s voice greeted him from deeper inside the shop “Nice way to start the day, not sounding suspicious at all”

“What? No, no, it’s nothing serious” he waved the matter off as he walked to the counter, setting his travel mug down and then moving to the door behind to leave his bag “Just some good ol’ bro solidarity”

“Alright, don’t worry, I’m not giving testimony against you if this other guy goes missing tonight”

Junhoe snickered softly, but the owner seemed to re think his words, then click his tongue “Well, maybe that’s not a very happy thing to say”

“Why?” Junhoe asked confused.

“Well, you know, with all the…” he sighed, dropping the keys into the counter’s drawer as usual “I guess we should call them accidents for now but I don’t think many believe this anymore”

“Oh, yeah, those”

“Yeah, those”

“But why do you say that? Did something happen?” he asked then, his mind suddenly going to the last sailor left roaming the city saying nonsense. Had he gone missing or something?

“No, I don’t think so, but don’t you think it’s quite enough with four tragic accidents in such little time?”

“Uh, yeah, of course, I just meant-”

“I know what you meant. But no, the last guy is still alive and singing all his woes through the pubs. Poor guy really sounds so off his rocker, I can only imagine what goes through his head these days” he shook his head in apparent pity, and Junhoe himself couldn’t really feel much different. 

As bad a feeling and impression the sailor had given him, it must’ve been at least perturbing to know you were the last survivor of your pals, even if they weren’t exactly friends. Moreso considering how sure the man was that there was someone after them, or now rather  _ him _ .

“You think he’ll go back to the boats anytime soon?” he asked.

“I don’t know, honestly. I don’t think I’ve seen him around last days either. Maybe he moved out, some people‘s been telling him to, would be the best for him I think”

“Maybe, yeah”

“Anyhow” Sungwoon said loudly, clapping him on the back “In this jolly mood I leave the shop in your hands, kid. Later!”

He snorted, but bid the owner his laters and set to get all in order to start his day.

It was nearing 3pm and he was eyeing one of the takeout leaflets they had stored in the drawers, thinking of calling that night and forego cooking, when a lonely chime from his phone brought his attention back from the extra cheddar cheese & bacon fries calling for his money. He eyed the phone absentmindedly for a while before reaching for it.

“Oh, what the fuck?” he mumbled in mild annoyance, glaring at the repeated text.

**Unknown**

_ Message deleted 14:49 _

He clicked his tongue, checking that it was now 14:50. Who was this person and what were they playing at? He had half a mind to write back and ask what the fuck they wanted, but Yunhyeong always told him not to answer weird messages from unknown numbers and not to get into arguments with an empty stomach. Both cases applied, so he put the phone back on the counter with a sigh.

The moment he let go, though, it chimed again with a new text, and he all but snatched the thing and started redacting his angry reply, only to notice it was Yunhyeong himself and not the unknown creeper.

**Yoyo**

>Hey June, you free soon?

As he started to write back, the door of the shop opened and in walked the owner. Nice timing, you’d say.

>Yea almost why?

>Just checking if you were still up to some takeover at my place?

>Did the guy fuck up? are we shit talking him? 

>is he a persona non grata already?

>No, no and no, calm down

>We talked things out… but he’s still weird and maybe just pissed about something else

>so it kind of left things ok but feeling weird too

>so maybe i still need to eat some frustration, want to join?

>lol, yea sure! 

>not lol at you frustrated tho just lol bc of course i’m in if theres food

>k?

>haha don’t worry June I know you ;)

>Alright, go on with your day, come to my place around 7?

>Sure thing

>Is chan coming?

>Nope, he’s got an exam this week and he’s on study duty/penitence

>weeeelp wont catch ME on that

>you dropped out June

>exactly

>my point

>ill find my greener pastures elsewhere

>i’m sure you will

>that sarcasm??

>No! I wouldn’t do that

>… and that?

>Also no! 

>look it’s past 3, go see Chanyeol as you promised him

>See you at 7!

He groaned, having forgotten his promise to help out Chanyeol at the mechanic’s shop. Before he could complain to his friend, though, the owner slapped his back harshly, dropping his bag on the counter over the leaflet of take out.

“Go kid, scram, shift’s over!”

Not wasting a second, he picked his stuff up, dropped it all in his bag and haphazardly tried to tidy up the counter before the owner sighed and pushed him away.

“One more mess to clean after you won’t change my life, June. Now bye!” 

“‘K, bye, sorry, I’ll clean up better tomorrow!” he called over his shoulder as he walked out of the store, but the owner knew better and just waved him off.

* * *

138

Something poked him sharply in the ribs, and he startled awake… Because apparently he’d fallen asleep at some point?

“If you’re tired go back home”

“Wha’?” he drawled.

“Go, you can still catch a bus” it was Yunhyeong talking to him.

He smacked his lips, getting a feel of his still sleepy tongue “Nah, ‘s ok ‘m not so sleepy”

He heard his friend chuckle from behind, probably in the kitchen. He could hear the soft sound of the coffee maker running, and that alone got him blinking the sleep from his eyes.

“You making coffee?” he asked turning his neck around, remembering he was on the floor against the couch and wouldn’t see much that way. He stood up then, slow and painful process while stretching his back and his stiff neck and making something pop loudly.

“Yeah, and I still have some meringue cookies from yesterday, want some?”

“Oh, hell yeah” 

He walked into the tiny kitchen, spotting his phone abandoned by the stove. He picked it up and instinctively checked it for notifications, but his last chats were still Chanwoo complaining about not being invited to their take out night, and Chanyeol sending him a picture of what he claimed was a squirrel on drugs but looked like nothing more than a postmodernist composition of blurs and lights.

Yunhyeong, on the other hand, seemed to be occupied with his own conversation, making faces and noises at the bright screen while tapping with both hands rather quickly. 

Then he remembered “Is that Donghyuk? We didn’t really talk shit about him in the end”

His friend snorted “I told you it wasn’t necessary, but yes, it’s him”

“You don’t look all that happy with him”

“No, it’s not… I mean, it’s just-” he sighed, running a hand through his dark and now messy hair. He turned and leaned his hip on the counter “It’s me, actually. I’m just… Bitter, I guess” he shrugged languidly.

Junhoe couldn’t help to laugh at his overly dramatic fallen face, just tried to cover it with a hand and more questions “B-but why even?”

“Because…” another shrug, and Junhoe noticed that he seemed a bit reluctant to talk, but it was Yunhyeong, he always favored his beloved communication, so he waited him out. It took him just a few seconds “Because he didn’t want my help” he finally said voice grave and breathy and face so serious that Junhoe kind of guffawed at that, unable to keep his cool 

“Sure, laugh at me” his friend said, crossing his arms in apparent offence.

“I’m sorry” he wheezed “I’m not-” he spurted some last laughs and then wiped a stray tear “Ah, man, sorry about that. It’s just your face, you need to audition for some drama, I swear to god” 

Yunhyeong clicked his tongue in annoyance, but conceded his point with the tiniest curl of his mouth “Are you gonna listen to me or just make fun of me?”

“I’m listening, I’m listening” 

The coffee maker started making the sounds of a choking dog, signaling the coffee was done, and they took their cups and moved back to the carpet in front of the couch. 

“So, it’s actually very simple” Yunhyeong started after a beat of silence, holding his cup with both hands to soak the warmth. Junhoe busied himself with his own warm cup, trying to ignore the unintentional flare of dramatic delivery his friend was so prone to, and simply lend an ear “When he relented and admitted there was something bothering him a lot, I offered to… Well, to listen to him, or to help him if I could. But he kind of avoided the subject. He was clearly still pissed about something, and it was uncomfortable to talk to him while he was so miffed. So I tried to get him to tell me, I just wanted to help him out and to… Not have to talk to an angry person, you know?” he shrugged, somehow looking shy or remorseful about something “And he got mad at me” Ah, probably that “And I get it, I got a bit intense maybe, but…”

“You just wanted to help him”

“Yeah” he took a sip, then leaned slightly towards Junhoe, like seeking for some extra warmth, or maybe just some comfort “I just don’t like it when people is snappy and angry, it makes me so uncomfortable. So maybe it was kind of selfish from me too, to insist so much”

“Well, you could have stopped talking to him until he got his shit together too, you know?”

“Yeah, but…”

“But?”

He got silence, but he knew his Yunhyeong.

“Let me help you,” he offered, not waiting for a response before continuing “you don’t want to stop talking to him because you are  _ so _ way in over your head with The Feels TM for that dude you can’t keep it in” 

Yunhyeong pushed away from him with a huff “Oh shut up, it’s not that” then slumped against the couch, nursing his mug for a moment “But maybe you’re right”

“Course I am” he flaunted, puffing his chest and nudging his friend's side softly with an elbow. That, at least, got him a genuine smile.

“Alright, yeah, shut up now”

“No, you didn’t finish”

“What else is there to tell?”

“I don’t know, you tell me. Are you still fighting with him or what?”

“Oh no, no” the other waved a hand at the apparently ridiculous idea “I apologized, and then he did, and then I apologized again and then him and then I insisted and then he almost got mad again but I managed to bring us both to a compromise”

“Oh god, you two truly are-”

“Yes, thank you for your opinion” Yunhyeong interrupted him in good nature, patting his knee gently “But no, we’re ok now. I’m just still a bit annoyed at my own lack of composure and… Honestly at the fact that he doesn’t really trust me that much yet. He said he had sorted things out and someone would help him” 

“Huh…” Junhoe took a long sip, mulling over what to say now “Then it’s all good, yeah?”

“Yeah, I just need to accept that we still have a long way to go before he unloads his problems to me and lets me help. I just have to learn his limits and respect his own times”

He nodded to the blank TV, in one of those occasions when he truly admired his friend’s emotional maturity. 

“Well damn” he said at a length, making Yunhyeong laugh in response “I would’ve been a bit more rough around the edges about it”

“I know you would” his friend said, and before Junhoe could protest, he quickly added “And that’s just fine, you’re a straight forward guy with a short fuse, maybe a bit too blunt sometimes, but hey” he nudged his knee with his own “You’ll find someone that understands your ways and bring you balance”

“Well, you guys do that already”

“Kind of, maybe. I mean we get how you work, but I don’t think we’ve managed to bring any balance at all” he chuckled, earning a nudge himself.

They let silence fall for a moment, turning to their drinks before they got too cold. Then Junhoe asked, a bit annoyed honestly “When did we start talking feelings and shit?”

Yunhyeong laughed heartily, but just said “It’s the coffee”

* * *

138/148

It was pretty cold and Junhoe was so sleepy by then, it all felt worse than it truly was. He was walking stiffly while grumbling in protest, munching lazily on a meringue cookie (that Yunhyeong had loaded in a tupperware and strictly told him to eat at home but fuck rules) while keeping an eye for his bus. He didn’t really have much hope, he had walked a few blocks already and he was pretty sure it was past the last bus’ time. Stupid small city bus services. Or at least just the bus that took him home, that was a particularly stupid one, yeah. 

To make it all worse, it was a weeknight, so people on the street was scarce. Thank goodness he was a 20 minute walk from Yunhyeong’s. It still sucked, though, so Junhoe continued sulking his way home while glaring sideways to the bus devoid street. Or just devoid street, actually. There weren’t even cars around, his own cookie munching was growing to be very loud in his head. What a lonely walk, man.

He was halfway home by the time he thought he heard the particular rumble of his bus, and debated for a second if it was worth a sprint to the stop when he was already so close. But he was cold and tired too. Wait, did he even have his commuter’s card? 

“Oh shoot” he mumbled, patting at his pockets in search for the thin plastic while balancing the open container in his other. He threw a look over his shoulder, having heard the vehicle grow closer but, to his disappointment, he discovered it to be the trash truck and no miraculous bus coming to pick him up.

He felt his soul deflate a little as the truck approached slowly, and watched it go past him in despondency, kind of wishing the bus would be magically behind it. No such luck. All there was was one other lonely pedestrian also looking at the truck from the other side of the street. Probably also wondering why the one bus with the worst service had to be to one that took them home. He sent them a little imaginary salute and turned to resume his walk.

At least now he didn’t have to worry paying attention, once past half the way he really didn’t see the point in paying the fee. He’d walk.

By the very last block, he was licking his fingers clean from the last meringue cookie and probably gotten a one way trip to stomachache-land for the night, he could almost feel the sugar clinging to his teeth and burning his throat a little. But it was worth it. He put the lid on the tupper and pushed it into his bag, then adjusted it and set to the last stretch home, already feeling the hot shower and the warm bed. He let himself smile softly, even hurrying his step slightly in the prospects of home and sleep. 

Without the cars and his eating, the silence had become more present, and so had the shift of his legs, the subtle tap of his soles, even his breathing was audible. It was a bit unnerving, like the whole world was keeping quiet to watch him go, but it was just the strangeness of it all. That’d be the case if not for the one off-step little tapping of shoes he heard just after thinking this. His tired mind placed the sound very close to his back, and that misfired an alarm in him that wouldn’t have surged in any other situation. 

He was conscious that he was probably being a bit too jumpy, but wiped his head around to look behind him, immediately feeling like an idiot when all he saw was the empty sidewalk, a distant, lonely light in the street, and one single person sitting on a bench, tapping at their phone some good meters back. He quickly turned back around, hoping he hadn’t been seen doing the dramatic hamster turn on thin air.

In retrospect, though, a less tired mind would have maybe noticed that the bench had been empty when he walked past it seconds before. But tired Junhoe felt stupid and just hurried home to avoid further embarrassment.

That’s why he also didn’t notice the shadow walking past the hall's window the moment he closed the building’s door behind him, or the figure coming to a stop by the other window as he beelined to the stairs.

Junhoe had nothing but to get to his shower and bed in mind, and that he did. He got home, dropped the bag on the table, went straight to the bathroom and twenty minutes later he was on his pjs, drying his hair with a hand towel on his bed while setting the alarm for the following morning. 

Mimo was already kneading her spot at his feet as he pulled the covers up to his chin. He was sure he was going to clock out the moment he closed his eyes, but the sudden thought of having forgotten to lock the door sparked some wakefulness back into his halfway to dreamland head.

“Fuuuuuuuck” he groaned, unwilling to get up. He tried sitting up, but just then Mimo walked over his chest to plop down her heavy body and purr violently over his covers. And that was it. The door would remain unlocked, it wouldn’t be the first time, honestly. So with one last, long sigh, he let himself sleep.

Ironically, just like Mimo was the one that had kept him in bed, she was also the one to later wake him up. 

At first he was frightened and very confused by the strange sound that had pulled him out of sleep, but quickly enough he recognized it was his cat and tried to calm his racing heart. Seconds later he realised that yes it was Mimo, but it was still strange. 

Because she was growling. Loudly.

“Kitty?” he managed to grumble half asleep “Wha’s wrong Mimo?”

But she ignored him, as usual in their relationship, and promptly jumped from his chest. He sat up, still in half a haze, and managed to pinpoint her chubby figure zoom out of his room. Junhoe was thoroughly confused by then already, but after a moment of silence, the loud angry growl of Mimo, immediately followed by a loud clatter and some bumping sounds got him awake very quickly.

His body still clumsy, he struggled out of his bed and stumbled to the living room. Not the smartest choice considering he was very uncoordinated, slow to react and clad only in his pajamas when he could be dealing with a suspicious or even dangerous situation, but, lucky for him, no one attacked him as he stepped out of his room.

He took a moment to adjust his eyes to the dark scene instead, squinting intensely to locate Mimo. He found her when she moved, barreling against the window and repeatedly hitting the glass with a paw. 

Alright, that explained the weird bumping noise, and, when he tried to approach his very distressed cat, he found the source for the earlier clatter when he tripped on a fallen chair.

He cursed and grumbled loudly, barely catching the attention of Mimo, who was now attentively looking through the window, apparently looking for something outside.

He sighed and approached her “What is it, baby?” he asked, foregoing his reflex to pet her head to avoid getting bitten “Whatcha looking at?”

He leaned over her carefully, peeking from behind the closed window to one side and the other, but there was nothing he could see in the night. Just the shapes of buildings and trees scattered here and there. The streets empty under the lonely street lamps, the shadows around the edges seemed still.

“There’s nothing there, baby” he said, noting how the cat had now fallen back to intense vigilance instead of outright aggression “Was it that ugly bird again?” he asked, daring to pet her softly and coming out unscathed. She still felt tense under his hand, though.

At the stray call of a crow or something alike in the proximities, he sighed and felt what was left of his tension melt away.

“Silly cat, you don’t do that to your human in the middle of the night” he scolded leniently, still petting her softly “Let’s go back to sleep”

He padded lazily to his room, stopping at the door to look back at the cat still perching on the table, looking intently out the window. 

“Mimo” he called “Come on, let’s go to bed” he tried patting his thigh, then clicking his tongue at her. But she was not having it, so he shrugged and went to bed.

Once he was tucked back in, he reached blindly for his phone on the nightstand and checked the hour. It was three in the morning. 

“Well fuck” he said to himself, hoping he’d be able to go back to sleep quickly. He'd had only a couple hours of sleep so far.

He dropped the phone on the pillow and breathed deeply, willing himself back to sleep. As he shifted on the mattress, though, he felt something catch softly at the sheets and pull the slightest bit at his wrist. The tiny rush of dread that followed took away what little drowsiness was left in him and had him almost paralized in order not to pull more. The moment he could regain his rationality, he huffed annoyed and reached with his other hand to turn on the lamp, effectively blinding himself in the process.

Groaning in equal parts effort and exasperation, he blinked the flares away from his eyes and checked his hand. It was, again, the bracelet that had caught one of the little plaques on a corner of the pillow. It had already dislodged, but he contemplated taking it off to sleep all the same. He had completely forgotten when he showered, but it didn’t seem to had taken any damage. He didn’t want to have it catching on something while he slept and snap it off, the sole thought gave him phantom heartburn.

“Alright, off you go” he said, gently unlatching the little lacing he had done and turning to deposit the bracelet on the bedside table. As he did so, the pearly plaques caught the light of the lamp, shimmering shyly. The artificial light was harsh and invasive, especially at such short distance, and Junhoe could suddenly see all the tiny imperfections in the pieces and even the discoloration and tiny frayed threads in the black thick cord and the thinner red braided through. Rugged or chipped edges, streaks and dots of color, a scratch here or there; it was somehow charming to see signals of use and wear on the little thing. It looked… Personal, warm in the way something used and cherished would. 

Junhoe found himself running the pad of his thumb over a chipped corner, feeling it catch and prickle. It was sharper than it looked, and he was surprised to find the tiniest dot on his finger, the skin punctured just enough to grow pinkish with the threat of a drop of blood, but not enough to push through. 

Contemplating both his finger and the bracelet, Junhoe ended up picking the thing back up, and gently re-tying it to his wrist, remembering even in his clumsy state to tie it tightly, but not too much. 

He laid down on his pillow again and raised his arm, watching the worn, little trinket rest on his skin and catching the light. With a long sigh, he let his arm fall and rested his hand on his chest. He didn’t usually move too much in his sleep, it should be ok. 

“Alright, now sleep” he said to himself without conviction, feeling himself way too awake to be hopeful. He reached out and turned the lamp off before getting more comfortable, and, almost unconsciously, resting his right hand on his left wrist, as if to protect the bracelet from getting caught again. 

He didn’t think much of it, he really didn’t want to entertain thoughts that could keep him awake, he really needed to sleep.

But it was not gonna happen, because the moment he relaxed against his bed, new rustle came from the living room. And now that he was more awake he could very well recognize the sounds of his cat not so graciously getting down from the table.

“Mimo” he called pleadingly “Leave that stupid bird and let me sleep, please” 

He got some silence in response, and he grew hopeful when he heard her little meowing at the door “Come sleep baby” he said, patting lightly at his side.

Out of nowhere, though, he heard her hiss and run into the room, going straight for the window and, predictably, as there was no table under it, falling down after barrelling against it. In a blur of shadowy motion, she jumped on his bed and hissed again at the window, stepping on Junhoe’s chest and growling loudly.

Caught between surprise, amusement and annoyance, Junhoe could only wish whatever bird was out there would go fuck itself asap or it was going to be a long night.

His own curses startled the cat and he earned a hiss for himself. Despite his irritation, he found that funny and chuckled deeply at the feline’s antics. Until the cat turned her attention back to the window with another loud hiss, and Junhoe follower her line of vision with a tired sigh. And then he actually saw what she had been growling at.

There was something at his window.

For a moment his brain could not comprehend what he was seeing, a large, dark shape perched on his window, unmoving. His brain could not conjure a reference quickly enough to make sense for him. There was something, just  _ something,  _ big and dark, right outside his room. 

Then it moved, and his blood ran cold at the sight of a shadow shifting from the edge of the window to the other, promptly disappearing behind the wall. 

Mimo growled aggressively from his chest, and suddenly her warning sounded terrifying. His heart had shot into a race, and a quick flow of hot shivers cascaded down his back. His eyes were stuck to the square of the window, fearing and expecting to see the figure again, deeply hoping it had been just a trick of the darkness. 

But it would not grant him the respite. He could have been seeing things, but the dark shape slowly creeping from a corner looked way too real to be just a finicky illusion. It was there again, still, perched at the outside of his bedroom, as if peeking inside… Staring at him.

Mimo meowed an awful sound, loud and aggressive and Junhoe felt all his hairs stand on end, the solid weight of his cat seemed to have multiplied, pressing down at his lungs along the hot fear.

He couldn’t stop looking, in irrational fear of the thing getting in if he lost sight, but also unable to move in absolute terror and the stark feeling of being intently watched.

“What the fuck Mimo what the fuck is that?” he heard himself ask in a whisper, to what his cat only hissed at the window, then growled again.

Every nerve in his body was screaming at him to both hide and run, but he was stuck staring at the black shape looming from the glass. The thin, fragile glass that was his only defense against it, whatever it was, whatever its intentions where. Was it a person? How the fuck-?  _ Why _ ?

The sudden pressure and burn on his chest was all he got before Mimo charged against the window again, violently hitting the glass with a wild growl. The shape moved, and for a horrific second Junhoe thought it was about to crash in to attack his cat. In the span of a second he was up and rushing to collect the furious little animal in his arms, ready to bolt away. And he tried, only his cat had other plans and scratched her way out of his hold immediately.

Overcome with fear, frustration and sudden anger, he turned to the window ready to- to... Do  _ something  _ he wasn’t sure about (probably getting himself murdered), but, to his puzzlement and alarm, the window was empty.

Before he could understand what was going on, the motion lights flashed on at the ground level, illuminating the blur of a dark figure rushing at the edge of the backyard of the building and swiftly disappearing into the night. 

And then stillness. 

Mimo was back at his bed, growling steadily, but he was still stuck in place in the middle of his room, eyes scanning the backyard in between confusion and alert with his heart still beating all the way to his throat and into every muscle. 

After a certain time he could not keep track of, the motion lights turned off, and despite one last rush of fear coursing through him at the lack of visual control, nothing else happened. He still waited, and waited. Counting in his head what was probably only a handful of minutes, but nothing else moved.

Was the… Thing gone? There was nothing at the window and nothing below, his eyes could pick up nothing now besides the usual shapes and shadows he was used to, although he would briefly think he saw a wisp of movement here or there, those did end up being just plays of his eyes in the dark. But the looming shape was not there.

His chest stopped pushing so much against his breathing, or maybe his breathing stopped forcing so much of his poor lungs. Whichever, he breathed deeper, the taut lock on his arm relaxed and finally allowed his eyes a rest from the intense scrutiny on the square of half light.

Gathering some extra courage, and doing his best to rationalize his thoughts, he approached the wall and then the window, peering out to a side, and then the other. He was kind of scared to come too close, fearing something would stamp against the glass or even break in if he got too close. But he still didn’t see anything out of place.

His bedroom window pointed to the back of the building, so there was no immediate street lamps to throw light on the ground. It was more darkness and the voluptuous shapes of the trees and greenery of backyards, then the geometrical lines of houses and buildings, only one with a tiny outdoor light, and then the street again. So it was a bit messy to try and pinpoint anything in between shadowy trees and fences.

And still, after a few minutes intently watching for movement, he saw nothing. He looked quickly behind him to find Mimo resting still on his bed, but now considerably more relaxed. Her tail was still curling in and out a little, and she was kind of attentive to him and the outside, but she was clearly not worried. 

Taking that as a good sign, he directed one last cursory look outside. He wanted to think it had been a bad joke of his bogged brain after all, but his cat going nuts over it and the motion sensitive light snapping on weren’t really letting him do so. Maybe it was some animal? A really big one, and a really ballsy one. One that would climb walls and cling to window sills… 

Alright, was it a person then? That was not comforting at all. Why would a person climb up two stories and cling to a window to peer at him so creepily. Was he being stalked, or-?

He gasped in realization when the unsettling memory of a person following him at night came back to him from those weeks ago. Could it be the same person? The same that had tried to follow Junmyeon and Chanyeol and then him? Had they figured out where he lived? Had this anything to do with the Emerald then? 

He shook his head, trying to dislodge the growing idea from his mind before it made him paranoid. But what if? Or what if not? Who was that then? Was he trying to draw too many connections? Was this just a creep peeking into the wrong window?

“Oh for fucks sake” he breathed out exasperated, running his hands through his already messy hair and trying to loosen up his muscles a little. 

It was clear that he was not getting a blink of sleep anymore, his head was all over the place and his nerves frayed. He let himself breathe and check one more time outside his window, convincing his eyes and brain that there was truly no longer a figure there.

Then he set to lock his door, key and bolt, and then gather courage to open the windows to reach out and close the shutters. He did so as quickly as he could, feeling his heart catch speed and his hands shake some while bolting the wood panes in place. Once he had that done, his whole body loosened up and he flopped on a chair by his table. Mimo had been snoozing off since he left the room, clearly unbothered now that she had successfully chased off the threat. But Junhoe was another story, he was only comforted that it seemed to have gone for the night, but then what? Would it come back? Should he call the police?

He groaned and planted his face on his palms. There was really no point in that, he guessed. He had nothing to go on, did he? Just a shadow by his window and a maybe stalker weeks ago? And Junmyeon had already reported that, hadn’t he? And should he tell the guys? He could only imagine the absolute freak out Yunhyeong would have. Chanyeol? He’d had the creeper situation too, but again, was there any point in doing that?

Well, in any case he could do nothing as of yet. It was barely four in the morning and if he was not reporting the freak out to the police (which he was still debating with himself about) then he should try to keep himself awake and in his right mind for the rest of the day.

With this in mind, and one last squeeze to the bracelet on his wrist, which he had been inadvertently messing with, he set to make himself some coffee. His still squeamish stomach would have to come around, he was not going through this without caffeine.

* * *

148

By the time he had left the bookstore, nerves pulled thin and jumpy as all fucks, his brain was already misfiring under the strain. His eyes were starting to burn in exhaustion, he could actually  _ feel  _ the dark circles under his eyes, and his stomach was churning in complain for the excess of caffeine and lack of actual food. 

In the end, he had called the police but, as he had predicted, there wasn’t much they could do. They had showed up near five in the morning, asked him some questions he was not sure how he’d answered to, checked around the building and his apartment and found nothing, and then tried to take the recordings of the security cameras in the hall and back door. But, to hammer the nail to the coffin of the whole endeavour, it turned out that the cameras had not been working for some months. None of them. Junhoe sent some kind thoughts to the building’s administration.

So with nothing to show for their efforts and the sun now crawling up the morning sky, the cops just left it at that. A shrug, a sigh, a non committal reassurance and the promise that there would be an officer keeping watch for some time, but Junhoe knew they thought he was either imagining things or just messing with them. It was far from comforting for Junhoe’s frayed wits. 

Maybe he shouldn’t have called the police after all, but at least he did the right thing, right? Right.

Now he was tired, sleepy but at the same time on his toes every ten minutes or so. It was a weird cycle his body had started sometime past noon, falling in slumps of fatigue and absentmindness then jumping up on high alert, feeling his senses pull in all directions and his mind flare alarms at every single pop of movement or sound. It was exhausting.

As he walked out of the shop, sluggish and too warm due to his body overtime work, he felt for the first time since the previous night his stomach demanding food with a rolling growl that was not just heartburn or nerves. Maybe he could drop by Yunhyeong’s for some food, and maybe also nap on his table… Again.

And so he did. He more or less maneuvered his way through the whole thing on autopilot, barely registering Yunhyeong’s concerned looks and questions and managing to avoid them with tired nonchalance and poor jokes just long enough until he got distracted with finishing the clean up for the afternoon lapse.

Junhoe ate less than he expected, his stomach throwing in the towel pretty quickly and his body pretty much cutting his energy influx the moment he had gotten full. He was dozing off in his seat, plates half full still, and head lolling to one side and the other while he struggled not to fall asleep before making sure Yunhyeong would be ok with him staying around.

But he did not make it. Next thing he knew, he was being softly shaken awake, a gentle voice calling his name.

“Come on, boy, wake up now”

It wasn’t Yunhyeong, it was a woman.

“You are going to get such a bad contracture if you keep sleeping like this” she was scolding without heat, her hand patting at his shoulder insistently “Come on, up”

He finally opened his eyes properly, feeling his eyelids so heavy it actually hurt his eyes for the effort. His face was pressed against the table and, yeah, his back hurt along with his neck. He painstakingly straightened up, feeling his spine cracking along.

Yunhyeong’s mother was looking over him, a hand on her hip and a reproachful but kind expression on her face “I don’t know why my son lets you sleep like that, you’ll hurt your back” she scolded, swiftly trying to fix his hair, which was very likely sticking out in all directions.

And where was this son of hers now?

“‘m sorry” he said, mouth still dragging behind a bit. He rubbed a sleeve over his mouth, fearing having drooled or something. Seemed dry enough “I was gon’ask”

“Oh it’s ok, are you having trouble sleeping again?”

“Yeah, som’in like that” he stretched his back and then his neck to both sides, relishing in the pops and cracks and groaning at the slight relief. Then he noticed something warm sliding from his shoulders, and moved his hand just in time to snatch one of Yunhyeong’s snuggly cardigans falling off his back.

On second inspection, he noticed the table had been cleared and cleaned, and that his phone was plugged and charging next to him.

“Ah, shi-” he stopped himself in time, switching words with very little grace “-eesus,” he chuckled awkwardly “I really slept, sorry I must have looked like a bum”

“Nonsense, we are about to open just now, you just slept through the afternoon lapse” she smiled.

He then noticed that the curtains were actually drawn shut and it was really silent inside. The only sounds were some murmurs from the kitchen. 

“Yunhyeong?” he asked, failing to see him around.

“He just left for an errand, he told me to come wake you up before we opened. If I had known you were here sleeping hunched over I’d come wake you sooner, you could have used one of the booth seats, the cushioned ones, kid”

“Ah, no, it’s ok I really wasn’t planning on…” well, he actually was, but she was not hearing that “It’s ok” he finished.

“Well, in any case, want me to fix you something to eat?”

“Oh, no, thank you, I actually had something before… Falling asleep” he stood up slowly, folding the cardigan messily and hesitating as to where to leave it.

“Give that to me, I’ll give it to him”

“Ah, yes thank you” he took his phone from the table, it was past 5:30. Right, they were about to open for the evening, he really needed to go “Uh, I’ll… I have to go, sorry for the trouble” he laughed awkwardly, but Yunhyeong’s mom just smiled at him and patted his face with a gentle hand. 

“You know it’s ok, boy. And it wouldn’t be the first time, or the last, I’d wager”

“Well, you know me” he conceded with a guilty smile “Thank you then, I’ll take my leave so you can start your evening”

“Sure you don’t want me to get some snack for you at least?”

“No, no, it’s really ok,” he insisted as he picked his bag and pocketed his phone “I have to go back home, my cat’s gonna eat me one of these days”

“Oh that poor chubby princess, you forgot to feed her again” the woman chastised.

“She’s got enough fat to last a whole winter“ he rebutted, only part in joke, while making his way to the exit. 

“Oh, Koo Junhoe!” he heard Yunhyeong’s mom call after him in mild reproach, but waving at him regardless when he turned at the door to wave her goodbye. 

Truth be told, he had left her three bowls of food that morning because he knew he was prone to stay out of the apartment, so she was probably well fed by then. But it was still fun to poke some fun at ms. Song, mostly because she took it in good grace and knew he cared for his little fur ball. And with his mood lightly boosted and having napped some, his body didn’t seem so set on driving him insane and behaved more normally at last.

He still needed to go back home and rest properly, he just wanted a moment of respite before facing his now bunker-ized apartment. The sun was still out, just starting to slide close to the horizon. Could he make it to his little groove for a moment of peace? He really, truly wanted to rid his head from all the paranoia and tension lingering within him. He’d be on his toes again that night, he just knew that, so he really, really wanted to have a moment with the ocean to empty his head and just... Be.

He could have walked, Yunhyeong’s family place wasn’t far from the harbour, but, again, he was tired. Nap and all, his energy levels were still on the low side and he didn’t want to fall asleep again. So when he heard the bus approaching from behind, he rushed to the following bus stop, where someone was already halting the car. 

In scarce minutes he was walking his way along the piers and to the open coast. Slowly leaving the noise and smells of the harbour behind and approaching the rocky grounds mostly void of people. 

The wind started picking up slightly as he left the shelter of constructions and walked further into the empty beach. It was chilly and humid, and the sun was growing orange in its descent. He would clearly not make it to his nook with enough time. He could still catch some leftover sun but it’d be gone in no time, and the tricky walk to and fro was not one he dared making in the dark. That did dampen his mood a little, but he was still going to at least walk up the rocks at the edge of the bay.

When he finally started stepping up the gentle way up the first prominent formations, the ocean was already the most he could hear. Far behind were now the clatter of people and the last strings of the city reaching into the port, boats and business left on the way. He could now hear the rush and rumble of the water and the low whistle of the wind. It was like an immediate balm to his state of mind, like entering his own safe bubble. It was as if the ocean were taking hold of him and shielding him from all the noise and dangers of the world behind him.

Just few meters past the rocks he felt as if he was breathing for the first time in a long while. Lungs growing big and full of the fresh, sea air carrying water and salt and his skin finally soothing down and letting go of the prickling current he had been feeling the entire day. He felt his head lighter, his thoughts mellowed down to a steady flow, sliding one after the other and not clashing like car crashes stuck into a tunnel.

He flopped down on a dry patch, not even minding plants or possible moss near. He was tired, he was now feeling every muscle in his body melt down in equal parts tiredness and ease. Oh he would end up falling asleep, he could feel it creeping up on him from the back of his head, the strings tangled around him the whole day were cutting loose one after the other. With every wave crashing softly against his perching spot, every time he saw the stray droplets reach up to spray the edge of the rocks, it was one step closer to sweet dreamland. 

Maybe he should keep himself distracted so not to fall asleep. It seemed apparent that he couldn’t just sit and enjoy the setting sun and the ocean without risking waking up in the middle of the night and probably with water running after him. 

Huh, he wondered, actually, just how high the water rose at night around there. Would it be actually safe to sleep there? Not that he planned to, but… Just in case. Would he wake up with the fishes? 

He checked around him to see just how mossy the rocks were, but it all seemed quite safe from the ocean and the salt. He took his bag off, let it rest on the ground, and then leaned over, crawling his way to the edge to peek down to the water swirling and splashing in wisps of foam and glimmering droplets under the sun. It wasn’t high at all, maybe a meter and then some, and the drop of rock was actually messy enough for him to climb down to soak his feet if he wanted to. Not at the moment, maybe, it was getting really cold if not for the bathing light of sun. 

He let himself flop down on his stomach, pillowing his head on one arm while he let the other hang down limp over the edge. He could feel some water spraying up against his skin like that, and damn if the warmth of the sun wasn’t fucking bone melting with the backdrop of the waves and the hypnotic come and go of the water against the rocks. It was almost like feeling himself rock along, slow and steady and so warm.

He forgot he was intending to check just how much the water rose, just let himself enjoy the encompassing comfort of his ocean and the welcome company of the setting sun. He kept his fingers moving, hand swinging a little, knocking softly on the rocky wall dropping beneath him just to keep something tethering him to the world of the awoken, but it was hard. He found himself peeling his eyes open more than once, each time with more effort, and each time enveloped in dimmer and dimmer light as the sun reddened into a very pleasant light that sparked on the vast surface of the ocean. 

You couldn’t blame him for dozing off once of twice, lulled to slumber by the murmur of the water, fresh and constant. He wished he could fall asleep like that, he really, really did. If only the sun were to stay with him as he slept, keeping him warm. And if the water stayed down, granting him space and humming long and soft to him like it did. 

Oh, yeah, that humm, there it was again! So soothing and mellow, so fucking soft and… Close. It was still sounding lonely, yearning, why did it do that? It was sad, calming and sweet but so fucking sad. It made him feel this strange longing too. Something growing heavy in his chest, a strange tingling in his fingers, a weird static on his skin. Like something was growing close, very close. The mild magnetism of another body millimeters away from him, but just not close enough. 

He felt his fingers twitch, as in response to this, his own chest pushing a humm out of himself, a response to the longing and the yearning and the warm comfort. He wanted it to stop hurting, but to stay close.

He sighed and cut his humming short, and his fingers twitched again, reminding him that he should be trying to keep awake even under the soothing spell of the sun and the ocean and the charming yet sad humming song. So, lacking the willpower to pry his eyes open again, he just moved his hand to try at tap on the rocks. But it was something else he tapped on, something that was hovering just beside his hand, something that had been apparently stuck to his bracelet, as it pulled when he moved, bringing forth that irrational surge of alarm again, making his eyes snap open and his head turn immediately.

The reflexive gasp got stuck in his throat, pulling one single cough out of him, and his hand closed quickly in a fist. His eyes took just a fraction of a second to adjust and focus, and then another to make sense of what he saw: 

It was his hand hanging down, curled, the bracelet had slipped down just shy of his knuckles, and there was one little pearly plaque sticking out. Not by itself, but plucked apart, standing sideways, held by a pair of fingers. Fingers not his, attached to a hand, also not his. And that hand- he followed its way with his eyes, dread quickly pulling in his belly- connected to an arm, and that to a shoulder... 

And he was suddenly looking at a dark pair of eyes. 

Just a fraction of a second.

He yelped, unable to scream properly in his shock, but scrambling backwards as fast as his limbs allowed, until he hit his back on the rocks. And then he stayed still, hand on his wrist, pressed over the bracelet. 

He almost feared something crawling from the edge, or something jumping from the side where the ground dropped closer towards the level of the sea. He held his hand over his racing heart, eyes running over the area suspiciously. After a moment, he was able to think rationally again, and realise that he had seen a hand. A hand and an arm and a face, or at least the eyes mostly. So there was no thing about to jump out of the water or crawl over the rock to attack him. It was a person. A weird one maybe, yeah, but hopefully not dangerous.

So with that in mind, and one last deep breath to calm his heart, he slowly moved to the edge again. He peered down cautiously, but found no one. There weren’t much places to hide, honestly, under the water or just away. Had the person left? Was he seeing things again? 

Well, the “again” could be still debated, but… Could it be the same person from the previous night? And the one from weeks ago? That would paint a very different situation, but his sleepy brain was still trying to catch up with all of the connections.

Suddenly, something moved in the corner of his eye, and he turned just in time to see someone ducking behind a rock. Without thinking clearly, Junhoe went straight after them, climbing down the path to the side away from the beach and close to the sea level, all the way keeping his eye strained on the one rock he had seen the person hide behind. It was kind of further in the water, so that meant whoever the person was, they were very likely getting soaked. What the heck were they doing? At this time of the day, in this weather, in this area?

“Hey!” he called just as he descended enough, deciding to keep some distance from the rock, just in case “Hey, you there” he called again, unsure of what he himself was expecting. Was it better for him if the person didn’t come out? If they truly were the same from the previous times, it was maybe not the best idea to confront them, he had thought Chanyeol an idiot for doing exactly that the first time. 

But this was just… Different. It felt different. He didn’t feel the hostility he had before, he hadn’t felt the need to run or hide like from the one following him or the one peering at him from his window. There had been fear in him those times, but now… Not so much. Besides the startle and once past the shock, all he had left were questions. A burning curiosity pushing him on. Was it the spell of daylight, even in its dying moments? Or maybe his tired mind just didn’t care about consequences anymore? 

Whatever the case, he was now calling again “I saw you hide in there, I can wait, you know?” he said, unsure just how true it was “Doubt you want to go back swimming all the way to the coast or along the cliff so…” he tried sounding nonchalant, going as far as to shrugg, even when he was probably not seen.

But he still got no answer. The silence stirred something like frustration in him, and even though he could see the sunlight dimming more and more, and the warm hues dull back to colder colors and fuzzy shadows, he felt himself unwilling to let this person go on or get away or just… Disappear again. 

“Come on” he heard himself say, his feet pushing him two steps closer. He was not sure who this was or what he was doing, but he needed to know.

“Are you the one following me around?” there was silence again, but the slight ripple of water at the edge of the rock, the last tendrils of it out of tune with the waves, edged him on to question “Were you the one creeping on my window? Huh? Was that you?” 

For a moment he waited anxiously, hoping for another sign, maybe reconsidering his demanding tone. If this was a dangerous person… But it really didn’t feel like it. At all. Maybe he was already delusional, maybe the ripples were just a fish. Was there someone back there at all? Was he talking to a rock? 

But then there was another stirr in the water, now almost imperceptible in the fading light. What did not escape his eyes, though, was the little something poking over the rock. Something little and indistinguishable that squiggled and then crawled up and gave Junhoe all the bad shivers until it formed a hand. And then another crawled at the side, and then the top of a head, slowly, started raising in the still weak shadows. 

Junhoe couldn’t see well enough to recognize them, but at least he was seeing a person. Not a shape or a shadow, he saw dark hair, damp and plastered to a forehead, a pair of eyes set on a cautious scowl, the bridge of a nose. He felt his breath stutter, his heart missing a beat. Were they…?

“S-so?” he insisted, feeling his voice weaker now, hearing it catch and quiver slightly “Was that you?” he tried keeping his composure, but he was really having problems focusing on the questions while having that pair of eyes suddenly nailed on him. They were intense, even in the distance, he could see the dark color and feel the heavy weight of them on his own. 

The person took a moment to gauge him, the hard eyes dark as coal going down to Junhoe’s feet and then back up slowly. You’d think it was a suggestive move, if not for the stern line of their brow. It felt almost predatory, but again, not in the suggestive sense, more like a very deliberate warning that Junhoe’s instincts seemed to catch very well, because his skin broke in goosebumps and he felt his pulse start to rush through his limbs. The sudden spasm in his legs were like his body saying ‘dude, we’re ready to bolt’.

There was something off with this person and it was starting to be clearer now that he was under their scrutiny. Maybe they were the same stalker after all, and still he felt stuck to them as much as his muscles tried to get him to move away. 

“Are you…?” he breathed out, trying to settle his nerves “Or not?” he demanded, managing to control his voice to sound firmer, pushing his uneasiness back and holding his ground.

To his surprise, the person shook his head slowly, eyes still fixed on him. Then he saw them blink slowly, and when the eyes opened again, the heavy set of the scowl was gone, and something in Junhoe snapped loose.

“No?” he mirrored the shake of head, which was once again reciprocated “No” he confirmed then, and the person, again, denied it with a shake “Alright” he accepted, in all his tired incoherency, believing in their word.

There was a moment of nothing, the person just watching and Junhoe waiting. For anything really. He admittedly startled a little when the other shifted, hoisting themselves up a little bit and bringing an arm up. That way Junhoe could pinpoint two things; the first being that he was pretty sure this was a man, for what he could see of his face and now part of his shoulders and collarbone, and second, noting that all he saw was bare skin, was he really swimming around the rock outcrops? He was either a very good swimmer or just stupidly careless.

But these assumptions flew out of his head when he understood that this man was actually reaching his arm out, towards him. His hand was kind of extended, as if still unsure of his actions, and he could see how he would minimally retract his arm before reaching out again. He was doubting, wasn’t he? This made Junhoe feel the slightly bit more at ease, for some reason, it somehow meant this guy was also quite doubtful of the whole situation, and Junhoe maybe wasn’t about to be murdered. Right?

He stepped forward, immediately noticing the other guy’s eyes go round in surprise. Was he not expecting him to approach? Even when he was the one reaching out? Or maybe Junhoe had misinterpreted the sign? But before he could hesitate, the man shifted slightly forward, like trying to get closer, if only just an inch or so.

So he continued his slow advance, carefully watching his every step, because this part was lower, and the water did go over it when the tide rose. The rocks were smoother, slimier, mossy and slippery in several parts. He really didn’t want to fall and break a bone or even get wet in the growing cold and receding light. He thoroughly hoped this was not some hidden agenda from this man, holding out his hand only to pull him into the water and drown him. Could you imagine?

But no, Junhoe was, maybe stupidly, trusting the stranger, and when he was close enough, he looked at the offered hand, and stopped in his tracks.

The man had bent his hand further down, exposing his inner wrist to him, his hand was not open in invitation, but rather curled in a slight claw, somewhat tense, untrusting. But what he was clearly trying to do was rather showing him something, the thing wrapped around his wrist, the black cord and the little pearly plaques threaded along its length. One just like the one Junhoe himself had.

He stared for a while, looking between the man’s eyes, still dark and intensely focusing on him, and the little thing around his wrist. Finally, he found his voice again.

“Is… Is this yours?” he asked meekly, showing his own wrist to him.

And then things changed, he could not comprehend how things had been any different just a second ago, but as the man’s face started parting from his cover, his lips moved, stretched, curved in a way Junhoe could not understand until he was overtaken by the sight of a smile that would render him speechless, breathless and motionless all in the span of one simple heartbeat. 

His brain could now only focus on this face, on the pair of eyes melting all the warning and mistrust away and opening in soft curves to him with nothing but warm excitement, bunching cheeks over what could only be the most charming grin he had ever seen. 

He was lost for a fragment of time, lost in between the day and the night, with the echoes of the sun painting new colors on this stranger while the shadows stalled just enough for him to commit the sight to memory. With the backdrop of the rolling waves and its foamy rivets, the earthy tones of the wet rocks framing him, the man was now burned in the most ethereal watercolors in his mind’s eye just before a prepotent leap of water came crashing on his new favourite piece of art and broke the spell.

But not quite, because away it washed the colors and shades, but it brought forth a bubbling chuckle that did strange things to Junhoe’s pulse, it diluted his blood and made it run lighter, faster, rush up to his head and then crash into his heart with a bang, ringing in his ears and leaving tendrils of mirth seeping into his skin. It was unreal, how he now could think of nothing but boxy smiles and roman noses and adorable laughter, rendered useless for the world as his overloaded brain tried to process all these shocks of endorphin inducing information as quickly as possible.

And then it all came back. The sounds around him and the night falling, the cold crawling up from his wet shoes and sneaking in through the wind against his clothes. And he was back at the slippery rocks staring at a complete stranger while showcasing silly bracelets to each other. 

And he found it funny, and bizarrely endearing and ridiculous and even embarrassing. But he laughed and his stranger laughed along with him, reigniting his thrilling rush of blood and the tingling heartbeats on his fingertips. 

In a dream crashing instant, a distant ship horn blared through the air, and the man on the rock wiped his head around so quickly Junhoe kind of imitated him in concern. But there was no vessel approaching anywhere near. With his senses sobered, though, he tried to solve his doubts.

“So, uh… Is this yours then?” he asked again, and the other looked at him curiously, like not completely understanding his question. Junhoe motioned to his wrist in case it had been forgotten, but the man just shook his head at him, smiled again, softer.

“It’s yours” he said, for some reason surprising Junhoe by speaking, as if he'd imagined this watercolor man beyond the mere trivialities of speech. But he did speak, his voice mellow and subdued, warm and placid like the sun while setting “Your name?” he was asked, the same softly lethargic color molding the words.

It took him a second to gather his thoughts and remember his own name.

“J-June” he finally offered. Almost adding in his last name but then just forgoing it. He wanted to ask for the stranger’s name, but doubted if it was alright of him to do so, there was something still elusive in the man, still hidden from him and distant, sheltered from him behind his rock and the ocean, just out of reach. But he was also just there, resting on his now folded arms and regarding Junhoe with unaffected calm, as if waiting for him. So he asked “Yours?”

“Hanbin” the man answered, simple and soft. 

And just like that, Junhoe had met Hanbin.

And just like that, they would part.

“I’ll see you again, June” Hanbin said, a tiny promise on his gentle smile, but also a resigned hue to his eyes. Junhoe couldn’t begin to explain how he understood, how he felt it all deep inside. But he did. And he also felt a deep longing just by hearing the words.

Before he could do anything, say anything, Hanbin had slid down behind the rock again, and in the following second Junhoe knew he was gone. Something in the damp coldness of the air feeling lonely against the vast ocean told him so.

And so, with a last mistified look at the darkening sky and a new void in a still vague shape, he turned around, and went back home.

* * *

148

“Do they know?” she asked, her voice unusually gentle.

He pondered his answer for a second, then shook his head, hesitated again, and just shrugged “I’m not sure, I haven’t talked much with them for a while now and… They don’t really say much to me anymore”

She sighed, closing her eyes long and slow, as if trying to conjure patience “Of course they don’t” she said with a tinge of sarcasm.

“They-they really can’t, you know… You know how it is” Donghyuk found himself blurting, because as much as he was frustrated with them, he also understood.

“Of course I know, kid” she agreed curtly “I just want to know how far this information has moved among them, if you get me”

A lonesome shiver crawled up his spine “Yeah, I get you” He really hoped this wasn’t known, that word hadn’t spread, that he just had been lucky to find out “But if… If they know, they won’t tell. I…” he felt himself get nervous, just by thinking of the implications of it all. He took a deep breath “They might be pissed with him but they are still his family, they love him, they won’t betray him”

He looked up to find her stare pinned on him, searching in the way she did to pull a lie out of hiding. Donghyuk dropped his eyes, it was a bit too much for him, but he knew he wasn’t lying.

“You know them well?”

“I know them well enough” he nodded.

“How much is well  _ enough _ ?”

He sighed, but relented “You know he’s my half brother, and they are his family… We’re kind of… Somehow related?” he shifted in his seat, feeling her scrutiny pushing at the side of his head. Her silence was indication enough that she wanted him to elaborate “We… Talked. When I visited him, they’d sometimes tag along, and they were nice to me, they supported us. They were just more cautious, and sometimes got mad at him when he got a bit reckless. And I understand, I was pissed because it meant I had less time with him but they did it for his safety”

He waited, gauging her reaction to see if that’d be enough for her, but she just crossed her arms and leaned back against the wall, cocking her head slightly to a side as if saying go on, I’m listening.

So he did “Things got… Tense after he started visiting more often, staying longer. They thought it was because of me, so they tried scolding me once, but he got really mad and then they argued really bad. After that they got kinda distant with me and he started avoiding them more… It was really awkward” he leaned back in his chair, knowing she wanted him to tell her all up to date “And then the boat incident happened when he was going back after one of our meetings. He had stayed really late and had been roaming for a day or two. He was so tired, I told him to go earlier but I didn’t really insist, because I…” he shrugged “I just wanted to talk to him more. So he went late and tired and yeah… You know that part”

“Yeah I know” she finally said, her voice soft but firm “And after that? I know that these fellows got angry, they came for you, didn’t they?”

“They did, and I get it. But they were just really upset, I don’t blame them for being mad at me, I should have sent him back sooner. But they never tried to hurt me or anything, if that’s what you’re implying”

“I wasn’t implying anything” she said simply “I just want to understand the situation, know the chances of shit hitting the fan”

“I… I don’t know that. They wouldn’t spill, if they knew. But I don’t know who might know”

She snickered lightly, for some reason beyond Donghyuk understanding. Then she sighed dramatically and pushed away from her perch against the wall.

"Well, well, well” she said airily “Besides the ever so charming family business, back to the land of the blessedly simple minded” she looked at him straight in the eye, but with less intensity “Some things  _ I _ know are that this Junhoe dude has no real clue what the fuck he got himself into” he raised one manicured finger, then another “he looks cute but is kinda slow” and a third “and his cat hates me but she’s adorable”

“Oh he’s got a cat?" he asked “I didn’t know”

“Yeah, chubby thing, very protective of her clueless human” she smiled “So precious”

He smiled at that, then thought of the guy in question and lost the joy “He really is clueless, huh”

“Indeed, but I don’t think he’s a mean dude, I believe your precious half brother really stumbled upon his perfect  _ lander _ ”

He grimaced “You really think so? This guy?”

His reaction amused her, obviously, she laughed again, eyes full of mirth “Oh, Dongdong, don’t be like that. Be happy for your brother” then her expression sobered a little, but kept a bit of the smile “It’s not ideal, I know. You’d know, Dongdong” she spared a swift look towards the kitchen before continuing “But this is what he’s been dealt, and in a way what you’ve been dealt too. They’ll have to work it out or let it die”

“I know” he said, already feeling the worry in his gut start to crawl “I don’t want him to be miserable, but I’m worried for him” he admitted “And this bloke doesn’t really look to be up to the task at all” he added heatedly “He really just- Ugh!”

She laughed openly now, clapping her hands in amusement “Oh Dongdong, how you make me laugh, you are yet  _ another  _ overprotective precious creature, you know that?”

“Are you comparing me with the fat cat?”

She leaned in and pinched his cheek sharply, smiling wide and unbothered “That’s exactly what I’m doing”

“Ah, stop it!” he tried pulling away from her grasp, his whining only amusing her further. 

But his wails did attract the attention of his own saviour from the kitchen. 

“Don’t stretch his cheeks anymore, Chaerin, we’ll have to pin them in place soon enough” his stepbrother said, walking closer with a slightly amused expression.

She cackled loudly, but finally relented her pinching.

“Kyungsoo!” Donghyuk complained, but smiled reluctantly “You are one to talk”

His step brother only smiled at him, unconcerned.

“Well, he’s not wrong” their guest said, wiggling her long nailed fingers at Kyungsoo “May I?”

“Ah” the man said with a finger up in warning “Our relationship is not quite there yet, I’m afraid”

“Fair enough” she said, picking her phone from the table “Well boys, as much as I love hanging around such charming cutie pies, I need to leave”

Donghyuk rolled his eyes discreetly and then smiled at her “Alright, thank you for helping me with this”

“No biggie, I hope you can stop fretting so much”

“I won’t, I still don’t like this guy but at least… I don’t know, at least it seems to be the right one I guess” he shrugged dismissively “For whatever that’s worth”

“Don’t be so fatalistic, as long as they keep it hush, they have time to figure it out”

He said nothing to this, unable to conjure enough optimism to agree with her, so he just nodded, smiling and waving at her as he greeted them goodbye.

Once the door was closed and they were left on their own, he could feel Kyungsoo’s stare on the back of his head. He didn’t want to address it, not ready to disclose what he knew he wanted to know. But it wasn’t necessary.

“So you went to her again?” was the question, and even without his answer, it followed “Dong, you need to stop this”

Containing his rush of anger he just spat a loud and curt “I won’t”

There was a tense moment of silence, then the sound of resignation in one slow sigh.

“I know” his step brother admitted “But at least be careful”

“I am-”

“You are not” he was interrupted strictly “You are actually scaring this guy, you know that. How long until he goes to the police or worse, just  _ leaves _ ”

The thought threw a damp towel on his irritation, and made him stutter a little in his answer.

“H-he wouldn’t- He wouldn’t just go, he lives there”

“Yeah, but what if he starts avoiding the shores or relocates or whatever? What if you actually manage to push him away from your brother?” 

“No, I won’t!” he protested, turning to confront the man “I’m not trying to do that, don’t say it like that” his brother didn’t relent in his admonishing stare, so he insisted, albeit more meekly “I’m not”

“Then stop with this nonsense” Kyungsoo said, his heavy eyebrows furrowing into a scowl.

“I just don’t trust he can be enough, I’m trying to know if-”

“Then talk to him like a normal person!” 

Kyungsoo’s booming voice startled him into silence. He rarely raised his tone to him, rarely even got mad at him to begin with. It was a bit overwhelming to be honest, especially after all the confusing emotions he had been dealing with lately. He felt a little choked up and winded, but tried to speak out still.

“I can’t-” he said, his voice unstable enough to make his stepbrother walk up to him and take him into a hug. Donghyuk didn’t refuse, he really didn’t want to argue with his brother now. Not about this.

“Yes you can, Dong, what are you talking about?” 

“I don’t know”

“How can that go wrong- Or rather, how can that go worse that having Chaerin stalk him to his home?”

It did sound really bad, and he groaned miserably as he shrinked against his brother.

“I don’t know what I’m doing” he finally admitted.

Kyungsoo let go of him and walked back to the kitchen, taking a mug from the counter and bringing it back to him. It was a simple chamomile tea, like he had already predicted Donghyuk needing some comfort. He snorted a little.

“I understand that you feel reassured if she helps you, it makes total sense that you’d want her insight and her help” his brother said, picking his keys and the truck’s “But I don’t think you are facing the issue in the right way, Dong. And I’m afraid it’ll end up backfiring” 

He said nothing, just seeped at his tea and watched his brother move around the living room as he readied to leave.

He finally walked back up to him and patted him gently on the arm.

“Talk to this Junhoe guy” he asked “If you think he has no idea what he’s doing or doesn’t have what it takes, then help him understand, help him be up for the challenge” Donghyuk felt the small hand pressing harder on his arm " _ Help _ him" his stepbrother repeated, tone almost pleading, and Donghyuk's heart panged in guilt and empathy. 

Donghyuk looked up to him, almost flinching at the pained expression in Kyungsoo’s face, at the way his eyes had unfocused slightly while pinned on the table. He knew where he was, where this damned business took him every time. His eyes were back to the shore, to years back. To his own braided cord, loose and faded around his neck. 

Knowing there was little he could do to soothe his brother’s pain, Donghyuk simply placed a hand over his, squeezing softly. And with a heavy blink, Kyungsoo was back. He seemed to blink his own memories away as he stepped back. He shrugged his jacket on and smiled good naturedly “Just talk to him, then you’ll know if he’s worth your trust or a good punch”

With that, he walked out the door with a final little wave, and Donghyuk was left to ponder on his own.

He knew where Kyungsoo came from and why he'd been disappointed in Donghyuk choices so far. He saw plain as day how he fretted on the sidelines as he watched Donghyuk pull and pull at a thread that could very well snap. He saw his mounting worry and his regrets as he held that lonely black cord wrapped around his neck tight in his fist. 

Maybe he should really try and talk with Junhoe before things got more complicated. Before he became someone he'd hate. 

He picked up his phone and stared at it for a moment. Maybe he shouldn't have deleted Junhoe's number, but it was whatever, he could always ask Kyungsoo again if he needed to. That is, once he dared admit to his step brother he had blown that one offer of help from his part. But he had one other number he also really needed to talk to. Maybe he would start there, righting his blunders one at the time.

He opened the contact and started typing.

**Yunghyeongie**

>Hey :)

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> If you got to the end and are still interested, thank you ;_;
> 
> Please let me know what you think and/or if you're in for this potential mess? Any (kind) feedback is always much appreciated~


End file.
